It all started 2 years ago. Things got
kinda tense... I started to kill a LOT of people or a LOT of people
started to get killed because of me...
- Their was that
Corporal... Bloggins? Joggins? Can't remember his name... Gave him an
order and he got gunned down by robots. Poor shmuck,.. Oh well!
- Had to kill assassins after me, after Tali, after Dr. Michelle, after blablablaBLA!!!
-
So I became a Specter... Went to Feros and killed all those villagers
infected by some plant. Their was that old lady that gave me grenades to
try to save them but, half way there, I already forgot I had them...
Woopsy! And that Asari that messed up my head... I got angry and I shot
her down like a sick dog just for the kicks! Hell yeah!
- Then I
went to Noveria. I killed just about EVERYBODY there to get a damn pass
for the garage... If only I said "please" in the first place... Their
was an old blue MILF with the biggest rack I've ever seen... Killed her
while her daughter watched (And I had sex with that daughter later. Ah
yeah!!) Oh! And I drowned a stupid singing bug in acid because I could.
Just saying!
- In stead of going after Saren, I decided to go
explore dozens of uncharted worlds because I got bored. I killed
scientists, giant worms, bandits, hostages, more bugs, alliance
soldiers, slavers, robots and wild puppies... And Batarians... God I
HATE Batarians!!!
- There was that azzwhole "Balak." He got me so
pissed of at him, he made it so personal, I told myself "screw those
hostages" you are a dead 4-eyed tuurd! So he blows up the hostages and I
get satisfaction! He died... I took a look at the room where the
hostages were. Very messy! Had to explain to the hostages father
afterwards... awkward...
- So we go to Virmire. Their are
indoctrinated people everywhere... I mad sure NONE of them could escape.
So I killed them all... and that Kaiden dude too. Sorry bros! Ashley is
a lot better looking! Plus, he got on my nerves with all his "logic"
thoughts on stuff.
- Then Saren attacks the citadel, the council got killed (F them!) and a month later, I got killed too.
-
Cerberus revived me and put me in charge! God, I must have destroyed 10
of their bases and killed hundreds of their men. I guess I didn't quite
understand the Illusive man. Damn idiot!
- Anyway killed many more people!
- Chose Morinth over Samara because I liked her style!
- Never opened the tank with the Krogan inside... I'm not stupid!
- Sold a robot for money
- Had sex with a crazy bald chick with Tattoos all over... The craziest are often the best lay!
- Got almost all my team dead trying to destroy a collector base... Bad decisions because I didn't care and tl;dnr! Sorry!
But
then... When the reapers came to earth and killed that little innocent
10 year old boy... I cried! I jumped in the shower and rolled up in
fetal position and cried loudly for hours asking WHY!!!!! Life is SO
cruel!!!! He was just a little boy!!! I had bad dreams with the boy... I
don't think I'll ever recover...
Oh well! Time to screw over
the Krogans and get the Quarians killed! We need to "synthesize" with
the reaper no matter how many people tell me they need to be
destroyed... Could also try to control them... I the Illusive man is
good, but I'm Shepard!!!
Hope you have enjoyed!
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