190 réponses à ce sujet

[spirosz]

Youth, you remind me of Kreia from KOTOR II.

[TEWR]

Youth4Ever wrote...

But why are you, at the very least, a "sarcastic ****" after you've been insulted? Honestly, why do you have to insult someone after you've been insulted? Would a truly kind person even repay insults or anger?

Ah, but is there ever such a thing as "truly kind"? "Truly kind" says, to me, a person who takes everything thrown at them. "Truly kind" says a person who will never lose their cool, no matter what.

No one's capable of that. 

Kindness isn't something to be defined solely by how you act at the worst times -- and as a note, I never said I can't take being insulted in stride. Only that if it's done up to a certain point, I lose my cool or temper.

It's also defined by concern for others, a pleasant disposition to other people, and many other things. All of those I have and all of those I display, unless a person sees fit that they should discard it first and then goes on to insult me repeatedly -- to the point where I have had enough.

Have you never gotten angry at someone for insulting you or doing something else? Have you never insulted someone after they've insulted you?

And you can't do this without insults or sarcasm?

I can. I've tried.

People don't listen. But if you scold them with vigor, they tend to listen more. Or so I've found. 

Being kind as I know it doesn't mean you can't express your opinion, but it means you do it without insults, sarcasm, rudeness, anger, self righteousness, etc. especially when someone has behaved in these way towards you. Being kind entails you do the kind thing whenever the opportunity presents itself.

But that's not the only opportunity for it. Helping feed the poor is another element of kindness.

It's not just "Turn the other cheek". Aristotle's remarks on kindness talk about other ideas of what makes kindness.

I wouldn't ask you to "take an insult", and I wouldn't say that being kind requires that you do. Simply, by most defintions, anger and kindness don't go hand-in-hand. For example, would you call your mother a loving person if she beat you when she felt stressed or angered, but otherwise treated you fairly? Personally, I wouldn't.

Neither would I, hence why I said "in certain situations". But anger and kindness can go together, I feel. Don't ask me to explain it though, as it's just a feeling that I can't put words to. 

As a note, anger is not synonymous with violence. An angry person is not, by default, violent unto others. If I'm angry, I may punch a wall as an outlet.

Doesn't help my hand any, but makes me feel better. 

Modifié par The Ethereal Writer Redux, 20 janvier 2013 - 05:52 .

[lil yonce]

spirosz wrote...

Youth, you remind me of Kreia from KOTOR II.

As I've never played KOTOR, I don't know who that is.

[Kaiser Arian XVII]

Yes, but I'm full of Ifs, maybes and perhapses. If one acts jerk or mistreats others, he will see my unkind side of personality. 

Modifié par Legatus Arianus, 20 janvier 2013 - 06:05 .

[Arch1eviathan]

Yeah. Maybe a little too kind. Or maybe I'm just really social awkward.

[Homebound]

Im so kind, people in the streets throw roses at my feet and I get to ride around on my own personal stallion.

[CandleJakk]

Only when I'm commanded to be.

[breakdown71289]

Yep, both online and in person

[lil yonce]

The Ethereal Writer Redux wrote...

Ah, but is there ever such a thing as "truly kind"? "Truly kind" says, to me, a person who takes everything thrown at them. "Truly kind" says a person who will never lose their cool, no matter what. No one's capable of that.

Yes, there is such a thing as being truly kind. As there are such things as being truly loving, caring, humble, fair, etc. And being kind doesn't require that you take insults lying down. You just don't repay them with insults of your own. If can no longer be kind, why don't you walk away from the irritating person or move on from the irritating poster? Why is it that you can't simply shrug, and say, "I'm sorry you feel that way," and move on?

Kindness isn't something to be defined solely by how you act at the worst times

I would disagree strongly with this remark, but it's interesting that you've stated it. It seems to be the prevailing attitude toward kindness in this thread.

-- And as a note, I never said I can't take being insulted in stride. Only that if it's done up to a certain point, I lose my cool or temper.

But why don't you leave or ignore the poster making the insult if you know you are becoming unkind? Online, if you know is prompting you to act in a way that conflicts with your described character?

It's also defined by concern for others.

That's sentiment, and to be kind is an active form of kindness. I can feel concern for others, but that doesn't mean I have to do anything to help them.

A pleasant disposition to other people, and other things. All of those I have and all of those I display, unless a person sees fit that they should discard it first and then goes on to insult me repeatedly -- to the point where I have had enough.

Do you not feel that this makes your character conditional?

Have you never gotten angry at someone for insulting you or doing something else? Have you never insulted someone after they've insulted you?

Absolutely, but I now realize it was not the kind thing to do, it was the irrational thing to do, and if I truly want to be a kind person I can't express my feelings on a whim. I can't repay someone with insults or ugliness. I can feel angry. It's natural to feel angry. I'm going to feel angry. But I don't have to do things out of anger. It doesn't happen overnight, it requires training, but I think I'll be a better person for it. In my view, I'll at least be the person I claim and aspire to be IRL and online.

I can. I've tried. People don't listen. But if you scold them with vigor, they tend to listen more. Or so I've found.

If an adult won't listen to sound argument or reason, why do you think they would respond to sarcasm, snide, rudeness, etc.?And do you really think you're being heard by the person you've just insulted or called out of name, etc.? Also, scolding or being firm is alot different from being insulting. I've never seen the latter work.

But that's not the only opportunity for it. Helping feed the poor is another element of kindness.

Yes, but in general that's easy. It's not hard for you to do that. Your character isn't being tested when help the needy after a payday. It's being tested when you're between paydays and the homeless person in the park begs you for a meal.

It's not just "Turn the other cheek". Aristotle's remarks on kindness talk about other ideas of what makes kindness.

No, it's not just turning the other cheek, but it includes that as a hallmark in most defintions.

But anger and kindness can go together, I feel. Don't ask me to explain it though, as it's just a feeling that I can't put words to. As a note, anger is not synonymous with violence. An angry person is not, by default, violent unto others. If I'm angry, I may punch a wall as an outlet. Doesn't help my hand any, but makes me feel better.

Going by the standard defintions, I have to disagree, but this is an interesting remark. So, IRL you may punch a wall, not becasue it's reasonable, but because you felt angry and it makes you feel better? And online, you may insult someone, not be because it made your argument better, but because it also made you feel better?

I take it back BSN, you've given me some great answers.

Modifié par Youth4Ever, 20 janvier 2013 - 01:03 .

[brettc893]

I don't care what others think of me, especially on the internet.

[lil yonce]

Arch1eviathan wrote...

Yeah. Maybe a little too kind. Or maybe I'm just really social awkward.

I've never heard these two things confused before.

CommanderShepard11 wrote...

Only when I'm commanded to be.

Would you kindly... be kind?

brettc893 wrote...

I don't care what others think of me, especially on the internet.

But what do you think about yourself? Do you consider yourself kind?

Modifié par Youth4Ever, 20 janvier 2013 - 01:28 .

[wsandista]

No.

[brettc893]

Youth4Ever wrote...

brettc893 wrote...

I don't care what others think of me, especially on the internet.

But what do you think about yourself? Do you consider yourself kind?

I have soft spots on my heart for certain kinds of people, and I have an uncontrollable hatred for certain other kinds.

As for everyone else, it depends on a number of factors. All a matter of perspective really.

I'm somehwere in the middle.

[Emzamination]

brettc893 wrote...

I don't care what others think of me, especially on the internet.

No one asked, tough guy.

[Ghost Lightning]

Emzamination wrote...

brettc893 wrote...

I don't care what others think of me, especially on the internet.

No one asked, tough guy.

lol

[brettc893]

Ghost Lightning wrote...

Emzamination wrote...

brettc893 wrote...

I don't care what others think of me, especially on the internet.

No one asked, tough guy.

lol

You stole my reply!

Modifié par brettc893, 20 janvier 2013 - 08:42 .

[Zeroth Angel]

Depends who I am talking to.

[Ren Roche]

I try to be as long as the people I'm talking with are polite and friendly. I try to behave on BSN and in real life, but sometimes I can be a really cold, apathetic person.

Modifié par Para-Medic, 20 janvier 2013 - 11:10 .

[Fisto The Sexbot]

I wouldn't say I'm especially predisposed toward it, so no. I don't go out of my way to act nice.

[_- Songlian -]

Youth4Ever wrote...

Lathrim wrote...

To those who deserve it (IMO). That list is quite limited. The rest? Pretty much the opposite.

Can kindness be so selective?

Personally, I don't think it can. It's like saying you define yourself as an honest person, but still cheat your way out of things when it's convenient.

And thank you for your previous response. On topic - I have absolutely no clue. I would like to think I am kind, but maybe there are people who think I'm an absolute b!tch when I turn my back.

I think such things are relative, and unless we have a clear definition on what kind represents, all you'll get is a personal opinion.