Cerberus Trooper: Since we're essentially disposable, the thing we look forward to most is a disconnection, as it's the only way we get to all go home, keep all intel, and prevent the enemy from retaining any credits or expendables. Thankfully, we never have long to wait.
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Marauder: Seriously, why don't the rest of you follow my lead and camp the device disarms?
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Cerberus Clean-Up Crew: Have you noticed how sometimes they all run off to that shuttle but all their credits are just left sitting on the floor? I've made millions just picking that stuff up.
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Cerberus Armoury: We observed some months ago that our best weaponry was falling into the hands of the enemy. We decided the optimum strategy to reduce the chances the enemy would be using our best weapons would be to flood the markets with some of our most pointless gear, mods and other crap so that the good stuff would disappear from sight.
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Geth trooper: What I really like to do is wait for that bit when a new enemy player is joining so that I can quickly move out of the way and have a few seconds shooting freely at the enemies already in play.
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Husk: Yeh, I spend a lot of time in the gym, it's true. I never put on any muscle, but I'm now able to grapple a Krogan Warlord even if they're part way through swinging a hammer twice my size, and I can even catch one of those Armiger Legion types leaping through the air with jet packs.
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The "What enemies would complain about" thread
Débuté par
N1GHTHeR0
, févr. 19 2013 02:39
Retour en haut
#52
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 09:29
jeansplice
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Centurion: 'How come we're Cerberus, and we have to use Mattocks?'
Nemesis: 'Even husks do more then us' /sadfacenemesis
Trooper: 'Wait what, they get to pick their weapons and armor?'
Geth Trooper: 'Why can't the Prime stunlock as much as that Quarian with the Adas'
Geth Trooper: 'Medi-gel works on geth units?'
Marauder: 'Someone should give those damn cannibals some food... and some hugs'
Nemesis: 'Even husks do more then us' /sadfacenemesis
Trooper: 'Wait what, they get to pick their weapons and armor?'
Geth Trooper: 'Why can't the Prime stunlock as much as that Quarian with the Adas'
Geth Trooper: 'Medi-gel works on geth units?'
Marauder: 'Someone should give those damn cannibals some food... and some hugs'
#53
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 09:32
Nitrocuban
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"What's with all that noobs trying to play Bronze? Srsly, if you can't handle higher difficulties, stick to Platinum!!!"
#54
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 12:06
soulstriker09
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Assault trooper: What?! Bob was in hard cover! How did they-- THEIR WEAPONS CAN PIERCE COV--- *splatter*
#55
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 12:09
N7Kopper
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- 4 386 messages
Cerberus:
Assault Trooper: How come I have more base health than a krogan, but still die to three bullets, while my Hornet does nothing of note?
Centurion: How come they never even seem to notice my smoke grenades? FML.
Nemesis: Nerf enemy shield gate biower plz! Single-shot snipers are useless!
Dragoon: Camping noobs! Feel the wrath of my BLARGLE *Dragoon has been taken down by N7Kopper*
Atlas: If my weak spot is supposed to be my exhaust port, how come I take more damage when their Destroyer Typhoons me in the canopy?
Phantom: My sword is specially designed to kill a krogan in one stab. A krogan, with all their redundant organs. So how in the name of all that's unholy did that stupid novaguard take one in the gut then spring up like nothing happened and Charge me halfway across the map!? Not to mention that my cloak is completely useless!
Kai Leng: If Phantoms can sync-kill people, and have powerful Phase Disruptors, and I'm a more powerful Phantom, how come I don't have either of those things at any usable level? More shields 8s useless against the Adas and Lash, BioWare! I struggled to beat Thane, and Thane players need to use a glitch to even come close to beong competitive! And that glitch was patched! At least I have good synergy with Gunship Pilot players...
Gunship Pilot: Why don't I get any lines?
Rampart: Hey guys, why can't I play?
Reapers:
Husk: How come two of us can drag a krogan off a cliff, but we can't even slow down a volus?
Cannibal: Stupid autoaim keeps making me eat corpses rather than toss grenades at the Infiltrator sniping the Brute!
Marauder: Their Phaeston is so much stronger than our Phaeston, but they consider it weak! Damn it, Catalyst, give us better gear!
Brute:Where's that Cannibal and his goddamn cover fire!? I'm useless until this claw gets in range!
Ravager: How come their Talon Mercenary shoots little homing crossbow bolts that kill me in one hit, but I can't even take down a drell with my gigantic cannon of death because my attacks never hit, and when they do, that damn shield gate stops it! I agree with Nemesis - enemy shield gate is OP.
Banshee: Oh, sure. When I used magnet hands, it was cheap, but when they use magnet hands, or that stupid Juggernaut zappy thing, it's working as intended. And why can't Dragoon or Seeker Swarm detonate my Warps?
Adjutant: Rampart and I are lonely.
Catalyst: Why does everyone think I need a nerf? Shepard has three massive counters to my special ability, and one of them kills me and all my Reapers in one hit and locks out my respawn for the rest of the game!
Collectors:
Seeker Swarm: I understand it makes sense in-lore because of Paragon Lost, but why did you nerf me, biower? I used to be able to paralyze people in one sting, now it takes an entire swarm just to stop them using space magic!
Collector Trooper: Who ever fell into my webs? They're so useless, why can't we get Dark Sphere too?
Collector Captain: Why can't my Seeker Swarms give me DR? I'm so squishy.
Abomination: Why does grabbing the enemy give them a chance to take my head off? My brains are the Cain, you know!
Scion: Sure, my shots are really damaging, but why is my melee so useless? What's the point of giving me a sync-kill?
Praetorian: How am I shooting lasers out of my bum? Autoaim gone mad - Cannibal has the right idea.
Harbinger: I think Shepard needs a buff, honestly. Even if s/he picks Vanguard, my laser still meets it's mark. Sure, it doesn't kill[/] Shepard, but it's the principle. Isn't Nova meant to make you invincible? At least Phantom think's s-oh crap N7s get into character-[i]ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL.
Geth:
Trooper: I want to fry people in an AoE with my shields! But I don't even have shields! Don't give me a heavy melee I can't use!
Rocket Trooper: Why do people rage about reload cancelling? It's not that hard. Now, that stupid rolling, on the other hand... why can't I roll like that?
Hunter: How come when I cloak, it just helps me avoid powers, but when they cloak, they go invisible and also get a damage buff? Plus they can cloak without shields! And their GPS ignores shield gate and mine doesn't! Blatant good-guy favouritism, BioWare!
Pyro: Enemy flamer: has DoT and no explosive fuel tank - my flamer: has no DoT and an explosive fuel tank. Seems legit.
Bomber: It's so hard to use my bombs to kill things! I need to float right over and drop them, but they never explode in time!
Prime: Why can't I deploy massive hex shields and restore my personal shields by melting enemy quarians into lifeless goo? Juggernauts are smaller than Primes! They're meant to be weaker!
Reaper Destroyer: Rocket Trooper is right. Enemy rolling is OP. Why does Harbinger think Shepard needs a buff? Does he use aimbot or something? The Death Laser skill is impossible to hit on anything smaller than at least a tank. And how does the quarian fleet never miss me, no matter how often I dodge? Gah, this game is broken. Unplayable.
Assault Trooper: How come I have more base health than a krogan, but still die to three bullets, while my Hornet does nothing of note?
Centurion: How come they never even seem to notice my smoke grenades? FML.
Nemesis: Nerf enemy shield gate biower plz! Single-shot snipers are useless!
Dragoon: Camping noobs! Feel the wrath of my BLARGLE *Dragoon has been taken down by N7Kopper*
Atlas: If my weak spot is supposed to be my exhaust port, how come I take more damage when their Destroyer Typhoons me in the canopy?
Phantom: My sword is specially designed to kill a krogan in one stab. A krogan, with all their redundant organs. So how in the name of all that's unholy did that stupid novaguard take one in the gut then spring up like nothing happened and Charge me halfway across the map!? Not to mention that my cloak is completely useless!
Kai Leng: If Phantoms can sync-kill people, and have powerful Phase Disruptors, and I'm a more powerful Phantom, how come I don't have either of those things at any usable level? More shields 8s useless against the Adas and Lash, BioWare! I struggled to beat Thane, and Thane players need to use a glitch to even come close to beong competitive! And that glitch was patched! At least I have good synergy with Gunship Pilot players...
Gunship Pilot: Why don't I get any lines?
Rampart: Hey guys, why can't I play?
Reapers:
Husk: How come two of us can drag a krogan off a cliff, but we can't even slow down a volus?
Cannibal: Stupid autoaim keeps making me eat corpses rather than toss grenades at the Infiltrator sniping the Brute!
Marauder: Their Phaeston is so much stronger than our Phaeston, but they consider it weak! Damn it, Catalyst, give us better gear!
Brute:Where's that Cannibal and his goddamn cover fire!? I'm useless until this claw gets in range!
Ravager: How come their Talon Mercenary shoots little homing crossbow bolts that kill me in one hit, but I can't even take down a drell with my gigantic cannon of death because my attacks never hit, and when they do, that damn shield gate stops it! I agree with Nemesis - enemy shield gate is OP.
Banshee: Oh, sure. When I used magnet hands, it was cheap, but when they use magnet hands, or that stupid Juggernaut zappy thing, it's working as intended. And why can't Dragoon or Seeker Swarm detonate my Warps?
Adjutant: Rampart and I are lonely.
Catalyst: Why does everyone think I need a nerf? Shepard has three massive counters to my special ability, and one of them kills me and all my Reapers in one hit and locks out my respawn for the rest of the game!
Collectors:
Seeker Swarm: I understand it makes sense in-lore because of Paragon Lost, but why did you nerf me, biower? I used to be able to paralyze people in one sting, now it takes an entire swarm just to stop them using space magic!
Collector Trooper: Who ever fell into my webs? They're so useless, why can't we get Dark Sphere too?
Collector Captain: Why can't my Seeker Swarms give me DR? I'm so squishy.
Abomination: Why does grabbing the enemy give them a chance to take my head off? My brains are the Cain, you know!
Scion: Sure, my shots are really damaging, but why is my melee so useless? What's the point of giving me a sync-kill?
Praetorian: How am I shooting lasers out of my bum? Autoaim gone mad - Cannibal has the right idea.
Harbinger: I think Shepard needs a buff, honestly. Even if s/he picks Vanguard, my laser still meets it's mark. Sure, it doesn't kill[/] Shepard, but it's the principle. Isn't Nova meant to make you invincible? At least Phantom think's s-oh crap N7s get into character-[i]ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL.
Geth:
Trooper: I want to fry people in an AoE with my shields! But I don't even have shields! Don't give me a heavy melee I can't use!
Rocket Trooper: Why do people rage about reload cancelling? It's not that hard. Now, that stupid rolling, on the other hand... why can't I roll like that?
Hunter: How come when I cloak, it just helps me avoid powers, but when they cloak, they go invisible and also get a damage buff? Plus they can cloak without shields! And their GPS ignores shield gate and mine doesn't! Blatant good-guy favouritism, BioWare!
Pyro: Enemy flamer: has DoT and no explosive fuel tank - my flamer: has no DoT and an explosive fuel tank. Seems legit.
Bomber: It's so hard to use my bombs to kill things! I need to float right over and drop them, but they never explode in time!
Prime: Why can't I deploy massive hex shields and restore my personal shields by melting enemy quarians into lifeless goo? Juggernauts are smaller than Primes! They're meant to be weaker!
Reaper Destroyer: Rocket Trooper is right. Enemy rolling is OP. Why does Harbinger think Shepard needs a buff? Does he use aimbot or something? The Death Laser skill is impossible to hit on anything smaller than at least a tank. And how does the quarian fleet never miss me, no matter how often I dodge? Gah, this game is broken. Unplayable.
#56
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 12:12
XxKennedyManxX
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- 108 messages
Geth Prime: "Why am I the only boss unit that has to walk around everything? "
"
#57
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 12:12
N7Kopper
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- 4 386 messages
formatting problems, typos, and Edit not working in this browser make me a sad double-poster.
#58
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 12:27
HusarX
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- 2 041 messages
***Nerf the Juggernaut. His sync-kill immunity is gamebreaking. I love this game, so I demand a nerf!!!***
-SugarBansheeXXX
-SugarBansheeXXX
#60
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 01:04
longgamma
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- 2 066 messages
Cerberus troops : how come the same armor size fits all of us?
#61
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 01:13
DarkseidXIII
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- 2 434 messages
Those f****** broken BB! They stun me! Then a few seconds later...BOOM! Stun me again! Stun lock is bull****! Don't get me started on that F****** ADAS! Cheating bull****!
#63
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 01:32
Nitrocuban
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- 5 767 messages
All Boss units:
"New Bug: Sync kill not working on Juggernaut?! WTF Biower!!!! FIX IT!!!!!!!!"
"New Bug: Sync kill not working on Juggernaut?! WTF Biower!!!! FIX IT!!!!!!!!"
#64
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 01:36
nicethugbert
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- Members
- 5 209 messages
"Eric doesn't love us anymore! He's abandoned us!"
"Seeker Swarms! Why the collectors and not us, Biowere?? Why don't we get swarms??? God! I'd kill Eric to get swarms!"
"Seeker Swarms! Why the collectors and not us, Biowere?? Why don't we get swarms??? God! I'd kill Eric to get swarms!"
Modifié par nicethugbert, 31 mars 2013 - 01:41 .
#65
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 01:50
Star fury
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- Members
- 6 394 messages
Marauders and Praetorians:
"Only real men play bronze. Go to platinum, scrubs."
"Only real men play bronze. Go to platinum, scrubs."
#66
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 01:57
vicwarrior
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- 106 messages
Cerberus trooper: Why do i get this tiny gun and no shields? this is not fair!
#67
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 02:00
Apostate 94
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- Members
- 60 messages
Cannibal 1: Oh look it's a Batarian sniping jerry and bob. I will give him a bear hug so he will focus on me instead and I'll shoot love dart's at him to show how much I care.
Cannibal 2: Noooo!!! Bert His fist bump is OP. Anyone who bumps back is like totally dead from it.
C1: It's so prrrrrrty...pppplllllllt!!!!
C2:Nooooooo!!!...im hungry I'll eat bert.
Cannibal 2: Noooo!!! Bert His fist bump is OP. Anyone who bumps back is like totally dead from it.
C1: It's so prrrrrrty...pppplllllllt!!!!
C2:Nooooooo!!!...im hungry I'll eat bert.
#68
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 02:00
Gamecontact
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- Members
- 335 messages
soulstriker09 wrote...
Assault trooper: What?! Bob was in hard cover! How did they-- THEIR WEAPONS CAN PIERCE COV--- *splatter*
When I read this part: "THEIR WEAPONS CAN PIERCE COV"
Then I looked your profile picture
Now I can't stop laughing
:lol:
#69
Posté 31 mars 2013 - 02:09
SinerAthin
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- Members
- 2 742 messages
BIOWARE!
THIS GAME HAS BEEN OUT FOR ALMOST A YEAR, AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T FIXED THE LOADOUT BUG. WE CAN'T SWITCH WEAPONS.
AND THE SPRINT BUTTON IS STILL BUGGED FOR US! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW CRIPPLING IT IS FOR US TO HAVE TO WALK EVERYWHERE!?
THIS GAME HAS BEEN OUT FOR ALMOST A YEAR, AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T FIXED THE LOADOUT BUG. WE CAN'T SWITCH WEAPONS.
AND THE SPRINT BUTTON IS STILL BUGGED FOR US! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW CRIPPLING IT IS FOR US TO HAVE TO WALK EVERYWHERE!?
Modifié par SinerAthin, 31 mars 2013 - 02:10 .
#70
Posté 02 avril 2013 - 06:11
ThatOddGuy
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- 1 396 messages
Abomination (in Heaven): "Wtf? Where are my 72 virgins?BIOWERPLZ"
#71
Posté 02 avril 2013 - 06:26
soulstriker09
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- 3 209 messages
Gamecontact wrote...
soulstriker09 wrote...
Assault trooper: What?! Bob was in hard cover! How did they-- THEIR WEAPONS CAN PIERCE COV--- *splatter*
When I read this part: "THEIR WEAPONS CAN PIERCE COV"
Then I looked your profile picture
Now I can't stop laughing
HAHA, NICE. I didn't realize that. Dammit now I can't suppress my giggles.
#72
Posté 02 avril 2013 - 06:42
TheLukerez
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- 578 messages
Lololol niceTiamatshade wrote...
They don't die when they shoot rockets at their feet!!!
#73
Posté 02 avril 2013 - 06:44
TheLukerez
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- 578 messages
You should have made a full blown rage comic of this with Cannibal faces.Apostate 94 wrote...
Cannibal 1: Oh look it's a Batarian sniping jerry and bob. I will give him a bear hug so he will focus on me instead and I'll shoot love dart's at him to show how much I care.
Cannibal 2: Noooo!!! Bert His fist bump is OP. Anyone who bumps back is like totally dead from it.
C1: It's so prrrrrrty...pppplllllllt!!!!
C2:Nooooooo!!!...im hungry I'll eat bert.
#74
Posté 02 avril 2013 - 07:06
KAM800
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- Members
- 13 messages
"Oh shi- oh shi- oh shi-"
Seriously, has anyone turned the camera around when they're dead and looked straight back up the barrel of another player's gun? Our characters look like a bunch of psychopathic monsters dredged from the darkest depths of the enemy's worst nightmares.
Seriously, has anyone turned the camera around when they're dead and looked straight back up the barrel of another player's gun? Our characters look like a bunch of psychopathic monsters dredged from the darkest depths of the enemy's worst nightmares.
#75
Posté 02 avril 2013 - 07:12
BattleCop88
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- Members
- 964 messages
Phantom- High-value N7 target confirmed dead. I'm preparing to take him back for inte-... He's getting up! *beep* Wait, what's that going off? *beep, beep, beep* F***F***F***F***!!! *missles launch*
