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[Redbelle]

And then..... WORLD CINEMA!!!!

[Kel Riever]

After rereading that piece for like the 20th time, I yet edited for redundancy again.  Nothing changes storywise.

 

But...I'm just saying posting the first draft of something is seriously raw.  Emotionally it is all right but grammatically....if I was being paid for this I would be editing about 20 more times!

[Redbelle]

Self appointed mission for this evening..... Sit down and finish the museum encounter

[Kel Riever]

Today is the day I am posting RB.  IT IS HAPPENING AS I SPEAK!

[Kel Riever]

The next part is up, though due to a misedit yesterday, it won't register because I replaced the text instead of making a new post.

 

You should be clear to go, RedBelle.

[Redbelle]

More Hijinks in the Museum!

 

Wylds destroyed some priceless artefacts.

 

Lucy is being Lucy and starting to manipulate Wyld.

 

Wyld has a mental meltdown moment.

 

The Valkyr needs panel beating back into shape.

 

Think that about covers it.

 

Oh, and the Oculus killed Neil Armstrong. Wyld avenged!

[Redbelle]

Also..... When describing a small round dor of light, it turns out that a certain word, p***k is considered unsuitable and blocked.

 

Seriously. Let's see now.

 

Pin-******

 

She pricked his finger with the needle

 

She felt a small ****** as the doctor injected her

 

He saw in the distance a small pin ****** of a landing light

 

He felt a ****** and a small stinging pain

 

Prickling sensation

 

The small ****** had carved out a small hollow scratched into the surface.

 

 

Hmmmm. Looks like I'll have to rethink how to describe events and situations in future to avoid the ***

[Kel Riever]

I saw that.

 

Hilarious.

 

Word filter WTF?

 

R/R should be up Monday.  It will take some forethought.  If I post in the other rpg it is because right now it takes less work!

[Redbelle]

Aye, the other seems to be a bit more, on the fly.

 

BAL has been going on awhile and we're nearly at the goal.

 

I'm getting Wyld to the goal. I can't have this RP end without getting to the beam

[sH0tgUn jUliA]

You can use ASCI characters and get around the *****

 

Suppose you have a character named Dick? Okay that gets by. I think.

[Redbelle]

Suppose you have a character named Prickle?

 

Okay, that one slides too.

[sH0tgUn jUliA]

And Kel runs off after leaving us with Rea holding Rothan's severed leg?

 

And what is really disheartening is editing "The Lost Asari" right now with the program Smart Edit. I love this program. It is finding all of my writing errors. Well not exactly errors but it is highlighting my bad habits. Words and phrases I use too often that stand out. Punctuation errors. There are certain words I use that may not be at the top of the list like "actually" that will stand out. A phrase I use a lot that is horrible is "going to be." 

 

I do my editing in MS Word so I copy the document into Smart Edit using copy and paste. Then I run the analysis. For about 80% of the stuff most of us need the Free version will do the job. For polishing there the paid version. It was fun finding out there are 427 uses of profanity in The Lost Asari out of 138,055 words. Of course I had to deal with Jack and Ranassa so what do you expect?

 

There's a paid version for $57 and a lite version that is FREE.

 

It won't find stuff like plot holes and ass pulls, but it is really helping this editing process go a lot faster.

 

Here's a link to the comparison between the free and paid versions: http://www.smart-edi...-smartedit.html

 

Here the link to the home page: http://www.smart-edit.com/

[Redbelle]

Yeeeeoooooowwwwww!

 

That leg must hurt. <Wyld - Oh sure, someone else get's cut off at the knee and noooow it's a big deal......Well he's not haivng one of mine!!!>

 

Depending on what happens next I think Rothan is going to be sitting out the rest of the war.

 

Good thing Wyld packed Dextro meds. Though finding him will be tough. There's still the thing that shot them

[sH0tgUn jUliA]

I pictured the entire leg. I think Rothan is an ex-Rothan. 

[Redbelle]

Well, with his handler gone for so long maybe it's time to consolidate the active players.

 

Having one person handle multiple characters with no sign of them returning is a bit much.

 

I'd probably have Zia and Naomi sit back on the sidelines right now. Much as the relationship has had it's ups and downs, the closer to the beam we get, the less room there is for the romance side of things.

 

Besides, I don't want to put anything in the way of Baldurjacks last charge. Man that guy will just..... not.... die!

[Kel Riever]

FYI, what happened wasn't the exact choreography (that would have happened if the other writer was around) but does honor the last intent of Khambilo as far as our PMs went.  With some luck I'll get to the immediate what happens next today.  I don't want to tease.  I just want to say soon the information will be out.

 

For Zia, I know FF is still around.  So there's someone watching in that regard, hopefully enjoying where it is all going with their character.

[Redbelle]

Zia was about to give Naomi both barrels of her recent sullen lifes outlook. She's probably building up to that.

[Redbelle]

Simpson eh?

[Kel Riever]

THE SAD!

 

But I know that Wyld must move on.

 

Feels are tremendous!

 

[Redbelle]

<Wyld's inner monologue>

 

Ooooh, Why!

 

Why do I have to leave the Asari I massaged into a biotic apocalyptic state behind!

 

And Rothan...... who gave me my first ....... leg...... experience.

 

Why? Cruel world!

 

WHHHHHHYYYYYYY!!!

 

<Lucy> Can I have some sand now please?

[Kel Riever]

Two thirds of my work is done, but I couldn't get a break until now.  With editing, I'll do my best to post up today.

[Redbelle]

Epic battle of cunning and ethos.

 

Because who doesn't want to tell the Reapers where to stick it.

[Kel Riever]

Thanks!  Next R/R thing coming this afternoon...gotta keep it moving...

[sH0tgUn jUliA]

If the muse speaks, you listen. Right now the golf course speaks. I hear you!!!! Sunny and dry for two days now.Hope it's not a soggy mess. Supposed to be dry through Wednesday. May even play my home course on Tuesday! Home course, aka the bog, is a very nice course from July through September, but so far has been a muddy mess, and we still haven't had the spring run off from the mountain. The water table is high there. It could get dicey when that happens. 

 

Nice job on the boss fight.

 

Oh, BTW, if y'all want when everything is in place, I'll start writing Shepard for his advance to the beam. 

[Kel Riever]

Golf!  I thought that might be the culprit.

 

After last night's entries, I am able to take a short pause.  So it isn't a wall of my posts, I'll get the next one up after either of you, SJ and RB.

 

One thing...I'm (in the story) about a minute away from thanax missile launch, so for shep beam run, let me just do that little stint!  I know I know..okay maybe I won't wait...