How about this? I think it is safe to say that most (if not all) of the people on the "realistic" side, for lack of a better term, were okay with DA:Origins. Why not use that as the baseline as to what we feel is realistic vs. unrealistic?
I still don't think that the term realistic is very accurate in this sense. It'd probably be clearer to simply say that you prefer the way DAO did it. I think people use the term often use the term "realistic" because it justifies that what they like is simply more appropriate and more in line with what they would like to see. If a person can convince other people that it's realistic (and hence, believable and appropriate) then you've "recruited more people."
See, what I don't get is this... DA:Origins was in development for atleast five years. An engine was developed for it, lore was developed for it, combat system, art style, etc. Why throw most of that out for the sequal? Why take all that time to make new animations and new art style, when so little time was given for development? Makes no sense.
The Eclipse engine is part of an evolution of an engine, going as far back as Aurora (with some attempted quick fixes and emergency rebuilds in there, from what I hear, as well). But the roots go back to Neverwinter Nights. It wasn't a new engine created specifically for Dragon Age.
A lot of what you saw in DAO (i.e. hornless Qunari) were because of fundamental issues with the state of the engine, and as you say, the game was in development for 5+ years so suggesting that you break down the issues with the character rigging design would have added more time onto that. Which would have meant even more risk and so forth, and the greater chance of a game having dated visuals and other things like that.
Given that spending even more time wasn't really an acceptable option, the choice would have come down to whether or not the Qunari (and Sten) simply get cut from the game altogether.
Mike L. talks alot about lessons learned... I don't think THIS lesson (DA2 combat style) has been learned.
This is where the challenge lies. How does one make a game for someone that prefers DA2's combat over DAOs, while you give the impression that any sort of legacy of DA2's combat is a negative thing for the game.
I see people make call outs to "Press a button, something awesome happens" and how this is just another example of it, when in reality the idea we were looking for for DA2 was that the combat was simply responsive. When you pushed the button, your character did something.