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Normal Relationship Option?

Débuté par Guest_Trista Hawke_* , nov. 02 2013 05:03

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#1
Guest_Trista Hawke_*
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:03

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 Allow me to explain. I enjoyed the dichotomy of having romantic interests that either pushed away the protag or obsessed over him/her. It seemed pretty polarized - at least I thought it was. And that's fun - don't get me wrong. But for the folks who are more interested in other aspects of the game, yet still want to establish a romantic relationship, can there be a normal (healthy?) relationship option? Nothing obsessive. Nothing "hard to get". No dependency issues, no intimacy issues. Just a regular relationship that develops naturally. A relationship in which both you and your LI say, "I love you"without any clingy psychosis or emotional aversion attached to it. 

(Forgive me, but I've never played through an entire straight male protag or a lesbian protag, so I'm going based off of my straight female relationship experiences.)

I think having this would allow players who are interested in giving their character a relationship but they seek something stable. Or in other words... a "normal" relationship. :) 

Edited For Clarification: OK, I need to clarify myself. If I see the word "boring" one more time, I may scream. Kidding. I enjoyed the relationships in DAO and DA2. But I felt that it became the expectation that my love interests would be severely f*cked up in some capacity or another. I'm not talking about being flawed, having a colorful array of quirks/idiosyncrasies, or simply being eccentric - I'm talking f*cked up. It was enjoyable, but also became the standard. Whether your LI was a murderer, a terrorist, an alcoholic, a nymphomaniac, anti-intimacy, delusional/compulsive liar, or more - it actually began to lose its edge because these over-exaggerated setbacks were commonplace. 

What interests me the most about having a "normal" relationship option (e.g. having all the normal setbacks/arguments, coupled with emotional stability, logic, reason, problem solving, compromise, forgiveness, understanding, and a fairly balanced moral compass) is that it truly has not been attempted. 

I'd like to see an unlikely "normal relationship" LI too. Say...Thedas' most stable/well adjusted Qunari. Just a random example. 

I don't think this would be boring.

I think it would be different.

Modifié par Trista Hawke, 06 novembre 2013 - 04:02 .

#2
Icy Magebane
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:14

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Maybe... a male Warden and Leliana was a pretty standard relationship story, and the ME series had that going for a while (no idea how it worked in ME3, which I did not play) with a variety of characters. DA2 seemed to be the exception to the rule, as there was no "normal" LI option at all. Everyone had some kind of drama going on... except maybe Anders, but I'm not 100% sure how his story went.

#3
JCAP
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:15

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But... usually our party is a freak show... Normal in our party is not the same normal we are talking about...

Modifié par JCAP, 02 novembre 2013 - 05:16 .

#4
Guest_Trista Hawke_*
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:26

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Icy Magebane wrote...

Maybe... a male Warden and Leliana was a pretty standard relationship story, and the ME series had that going for a while (no idea how it worked in ME3, which I did not play) with a variety of characters. DA2 seemed to be the exception to the rule, as there was no "normal" LI option at all. Everyone had some kind of drama going on... except maybe Anders, but I'm not 100% sure how his story went.

 

I thought he was obsessive. I actually was thinking of him when I said "dependency issues" and "clingy" lol. 

#5
Hippiethecat124
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:27

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This is the main reason I couldn't really enjoy the Fenris romance in DAII, unfortunately (I understand it's supposed to be very good, but the whole "I love you, I hate you" thing turns me off faster than clown porn). I enjoy a bit of tension in a romance, some history and baggage to discuss and overcome, but the progression into obsessive partnership can be a little odd when your LI pulls you aside after a ferocious battle to ask where you see yourselves going after a week of flirting. =P

#6
Guest_Trista Hawke_*
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:27

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JCAP wrote...

But... usually our party is a freak show... Normal in our party is not the same normal we are talking about...

 

Rather than analyze the philosophical meaning of "normal" - I can clarify in that I meant a balanced relationship. ;)

#7
Guest_Trista Hawke_*
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:30

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Hippiethecat124 wrote...

the whole "I love you, I hate you" thing turns me off faster than clown porn).

 

So much agreeing with you here. 

I love you - I HATE you. And honestly, he never even SAYS he loves you. He shows it - sure. But he's never explicit. It would have been a thrill to have touched Fenris so deeply that he climbs out of his spiky shell for 2 seconds to bluntly say, "I love you." Likely, he never told *anyone* he ever loved them. That would have made your protag super special. Instead, you're just lumped in with everyone else and you have to "read between the lines" as Fenris speaks to you from behind his giant, lyrium-covered wall. LOL

Modifié par Trista Hawke, 02 novembre 2013 - 05:31 .

#8
JCAP
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:32

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Trista Hawke wrote...

JCAP wrote...

But... usually our party is a freak show... Normal in our party is not the same normal we are talking about...

 

Rather than analyze the philosophical meaning of "normal" - I can clarify in that I meant a balanced relationship. ;)



I know, just kidding:P


I don't mind what kind of romance story is as long it is well written. I loved Alistair and Leliana straight romances for example.  

#9
Wulfram
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:32

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I think DA2 male LIs were fairly atypical for Bioware romances, I wouldn't really expect DAI to be the same.

#10
Ianamus
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:32

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Id like to see an inversion of the whole "Li is broken, you need to fix them"- I want an LI who is stable and happy and helps to resolve the issues the Inquistor is left with from the stress/burden of running an organisation and the difficult choices they have to make.

I think the female LI in DA:2 were not much better than the male ones when it came to issues. Isabela tries to push you away romantically and Merrill isn't particularly clingy or obsessive towards Hawke, but she is towards the mirror, and has some serious hero-worship issues. Its really saying something that the naive elven bloodmage is the most stable LI in DA2 :P

Modifié par EJ107, 02 novembre 2013 - 05:33 .

#11
riverbanks
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:36

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To be fair, Fenris' relationship is not a "I love you/I hate you" dynamic, it's a "I love you but I hate myself" one.

#12
Ianamus
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:42

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riverbanks wrote...

To be fair, Fenris' relationship is not a "I love you/I hate you" dynamic, it's a "I love you but I hate myself" one.


It's less "I hate myself" and more "I hate the fact that I can't stop hating magisters and magic"

Theres a lot of hate involved, either way.

Modifié par EJ107, 02 novembre 2013 - 05:42 .

#13
Guest_Trista Hawke_*
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:47

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JCAP wrote...

Trista Hawke wrote...

JCAP wrote...

But... usually our party is a freak show... Normal in our party is not the same normal we are talking about...

 

Rather than analyze the philosophical meaning of "normal" - I can clarify in that I meant a balanced relationship. ;)



I know, just kidding:P


I don't mind what kind of romance story is as long it is well written. I loved Alistair and Leliana straight romances for example.  

 

I'm currently playing my first male DAO run through and I am romancing Morrigan. I enjoy her relationship, though she falls under the same category as being "hard to get" or having "intimacy issues" - especially when she gets a little butthurt over the fact that you asked her about the possibility of falling in love. LOL

#14
Hippiethecat124
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 05:52

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@riverbanks
I can see where that part of his character comes through at times, but having a similar personality IRL, I've been told many times that the hating yourself problem can come across as hating everyone (so, kudos to Bioware for allowing that interpretation, I think). He's a good character, I just found the constant prickliness to be detrimental for my romance with my Hawke. Relationships are definitely a Mileage May Vary subject, so they're difficult to discuss without upsetting people or drawing trolls (ME3 board....).

And @EJ107, I absolutely agree with you. One thing Bioware started to get away from a little (but now seems to be returning to, thank the Maker) is characters asking how YOU, the PC feel about events. I feel that makes both your character and the LI more personable and relatable. I would love to see this utilized in Inquisition. (And I totally agree about Merrill.... My canon Hawke is with Anders McClingy, but Merrill was my favorite romance)

#15
Makkaramestari
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:15

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The romance is what the character is, cute and cuddly Fenris wouldn't be any more convincing than a warm and considerate Isabella. For a balanced relationship you need a balanced character to have that with.

What I'd like to see is a LI who has academic qualities; smart, knowledgeable, curious amd civilized. Kinda like that Red Wizard from Mask of the Betrayer; I think that qualified as a balanced relationship aswell.

Hell, even if it's not a love interest, I'd like to see the academic personality represented more, as we didn't see that in either DA:O or DA2. Perhaps a healer who is more motivated by academic curiosity than some deep emotional issue, or a rogue historian/archaeologist fascinated by ancient Tevinter/Elven culture. Maybe even a dwarven engineer, or a Qunari (or tal vasoth) philosopher.

Each of those character concepts could easily have balanced, yet interesting romances.

#16
riverbanks
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:15

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EJ107 wrote...

<snip>

It's less "I hate myself" and more "I hate the fact that I can't stop hating magisters and magic"

Theres a lot of hate involved, either way.


That too, yes. Good call.

To the matter at hand... can't say I personally enjoy those simpler relationships with no conflicts, but I'm not against one being the game. Like, my favorite romances are Zevran and Fenris (apparently I'm a sucker for self-loathing suckers with commitment issues? lol), but Alistair's and Merrill's... streamlined? relationships don't bother me for existing. So if it make some fans happy, why not.

Gaider did mention in his tumblr that they're trying to make relationships different this time though, explore relationship dynamics they haven't touched on yet, so anything can happen. Who knows what new romance archetypes we'll be getting this time.

#17
Milan92
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:19

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The Ashley romance in ME 1 felt normal to me.

#18
Hainkpe
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:22

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What is "normal?"

It's all really subjective.

#19
TheKomandorShepard
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:26

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This is dragon age we have no single companion without tragic past ,trauma or hard childhood and companions aren't much sane maybe except alistair.It would be nice if finally we get someone normal as companion.

#20
agonis
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:35

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It could be that certain romances are blocked this time depending on the Inquisitor´s behaviour in the game. If you do something that a follower dissaproves of strongly they wouldn´t want be close to you.

That would be a normal reaction and something Bioware didn´t try before.

On "normal" romances. Yes, DA2 was quite special, other Bioware games had more moderate companions and romances. Especially Mass Effect romances seemed to be more supportive than drama. Imagine Liara leaving you suddenly with the Information about the Katalyst or Garrus having a fit and storming of, or Tali destroying the Geth because there should be no compromise... Oh lord...

#21
CuriousArtemis
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:38

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A boring romance makes a boring story. BW excels at telling great stories, and that includes turbulent and passionate romances.

That little "quirk" each love interest possessed is really what made me enjoy the romance most. Fenris' trust issues... so rewarding when he finally trusts Hawke 100%, and their make-up/reunion scene is the sweetest in the world. Isabel's trust issues... at first she tries to laugh off any real feelings, but once she's able to relax and just let herself be in love, it's equally sweet and precious. Same with Zevran... he didn't think he'd find real love, only physical intimacy, and falling in love surprises him, so he's afraid to admit to it, to put himself out there. When he does propose to the Warden, it's a very moving moment, and you just want to hug him because he's come so far.

Those are my canon romances, but I don't doubt the other romances are equally complex, moving, and just generally well-written.

Modifié par motomotogirl, 02 novembre 2013 - 06:38 .

#22
CroGamer002
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 06:55

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Milan92 wrote...

The Ashley romance in ME 1 felt normal to me.


But sadly, most people hated her. :(

#23
Guest_Lady Glint_*
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 07:02

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Can we have the option to not say "I wuv U!" because that just... isn't my style.

#24
Blackrising
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 07:09

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I thought Alistair's romance was pretty balanced. He was a nice and sweet guy who had no severe issues. The only hickup in his romance was his bloodline and birthright. Other than that, it's a pretty straightforward 'I like you, I love you, let's get it on, let's be together forever' thing.

Leliana was 'normal' (*coughboringcough*) as well, if you ignore the 'I want to keep your eyelashes in a jaaaaar' comment.

The problem in DA2 was that the male LIs both represented extremes and were both pretty damaged. If you like healthy relationships, DA2 definitely wasn't for you.

#25
Hippiethecat124
Posté 02 novembre 2013 - 07:10

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I don't think that "normal" necessarily equals "boring." And "normal" also shouldn't equal "completely and totally free of all emotional problems." I don't think normal ever exists IRL in the strictest definition of the word, nor should it in video games.
I can't think of a "bad" romance that Bioware has done in general (except for Jacob in ME3), though I know a lot of people vehemently disagree, and that's fine, and I know some people like more intrigue and drama in their romances, and that's fine too. It's all fine. Romancing the mailbox and everything. I just think a grounded romance would be a nice option for those who want it. Maybe the Inquisitor could be the one who needs someone to break through their shell!
Just new dynamics for different people, that's all. =)
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