75 réponses à ce sujet

[Rasofe]

On Sanctuary -

Shepard: *Knocks at the door.*
Miranda: Come in!
Shepard: *walks in, looks at Miranda* Trouble with the Crucible.
Miranda: Oh no! What sort of trouble?
Shepard: One of the prothvis has gone lobster in a genship.
Miranda: Pardon?
Shepard: One of the prothvis has gone lobster in genship.
Miranda: I don't understand what you're saying!
Shepard: One of the Prothean V I's has been lost in a gunship!
Miranda: Well what on Earth does that mean!?
Shepard: I don't know! Hackett just told me to come in here and say there was trouble with the Crucible, that's all! I didn't expect the kind of Cerberus inquisition!

*Fanfare as Kai Leng, Oleg Petrovsky and Henry Lawson barge in*
Kai Leng: Nobody Expects the Cerberus Inquisition!
Our chief weapon is surprise! Surprise and fear, fear and surprise! Our two weapons are fear and surprise, and ruthless efficiency. Our three weapons are fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the Illusive Man! Our FOUR... no... Amongst our weaponry are such elements as fear, surp.... I'll come in again.

*The Cerberus Inquisition leaves*

[Oni Changas]

*In the Crucible chamber*

Shepard: "Do it then! If you're not indoctrinated, it's that simple."

TIM: "I will Shepard, I just need to make you understand."

Shepard: "You can't, can you? You've lost sight of the man you were."

TIM: "I know what man I am! I'M THE MAN CONTROLLING THE MAN, BEING CONTROLLED BY ANOTHER MAN!"

Shepard: "..."

TIM: "You're a man that doesn't know he is indoctrinated!"

Shepard: "Or are you a dude that has no idea he is, but claims to know what he is by claiming others are making mistates.."

TIM: "I know what dude I am!"


Shepard: "You're scared."

TIM: "I'm not scared, scared of what!?


Shepard: "Or scared of who."

TIM: "Scared of Who?!"

Shepard: "Scared of you."

*TIM commits suicide*

[TheMyron]

OniTYME wrote...

*In the Crucible chamber*

Shepard: "Do it then! If you're not indoctrinated, it's that simple."

TIM: "I will Shepard, I just need to make you understand."

Shepard: "You can't, can you? You've lost sight of the man you were."

TIM: "I know what man I am! I'M THE MAN CONTROLLING THE MAN, BEING CONTROLLED BY ANOTHER MAN!"

Shepard: "..."

TIM: "You're a man that doesn't know he is indoctrinated!"

Shepard: "Or are you a dude that has no idea he is, but claims to know what he is by claiming others are making mistates.."

TIM: "I know what dude I am!"


Shepard: "You're scared."

TIM: "I'm not scared, scared of what!?


Shepard: "Or scared of who."

TIM: "Scared of Who?!"

Shepard: "Scared of you."

*TIM commits suicide*

"Am I the only one who ISN'T indoctrinated?

[TheMyron]

Rasofe wrote...

On Sanctuary -

Shepard: *Knocks at the door.*
Miranda: Come in!
Shepard: *walks in, looks at Miranda* Trouble with the Crucible.
Miranda: Oh no! What sort of trouble?
Shepard: One of the prothvis has gone lobster in a genship.
Miranda: Pardon?
Shepard: One of the prothvis has gone lobster in genship.
Miranda: I don't understand what you're saying!
Shepard: One of the Prothean V I's has been lost in a gunship!
Miranda: Well what on Earth does that mean!?
Shepard: I don't know! Hackett just told me to come in here and say there was trouble with the Crucible, that's all! I didn't expect the kind of Cerberus inquisition!

*Fanfare as Kai Leng, Oleg Petrovsky and Henry Lawson barge in*
Kai Leng: Nobody Expects the Cerberus Inquisition!
Our chief weapon is surprise! Surprise and fear, fear and surprise! Our two weapons are fear and surprise, and ruthless efficiency. Our three weapons are fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the Illusive Man! Our FOUR... no... Amongst our weaponry are such elements as fear, surp.... I'll come in again.

*The Cerberus Inquisition leaves*

Come on people, I can't get them all, you should a source link just in case...

[TheMyron]

Avina: I have no information on a "Reaper."

Kasumi: They're really selling the "Geth did it" message. I bet you can't even say "Reapers" without inciting a panic. Reapers!

Shepard: Ooooh! Do it again!

Kasumi: Reapers! 

Shepard: Ooooh!

Kasumi: Reapers, Reapers, Reapers!

Shepard: Oooooh!

Garrus: I'm surrounded by idiots...

[DeinonSlayer]

*A large flask sits within the darkness of a closed refrigerator*
Grunt: *groans repeatedly*
Joker: "Yeah, there he is!"
Mordin: "Vat-grown Krogan procuring intoxicant. Insufficient tolerance, aggressive tendencies problematic! Getting away! Must not let him get to the re-"
*Grunt opens the door, grabs the flask of Ryncol and closes the door*
Joker: "D-don't do it, pal!"
Mordin: "Do. Not. Do it!"
Grunt: *chugs* *belches*
Zaeed: "Oohhhhhhh, hell..."
Joker: "H-h-hey, let's just calm down here! You listening? J-j-just... OH GOD!"
Grunt: "Heh... heh... heh..."
*loud footsteps are heard gathering speed*
Joker: "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GO-"
*Several loud thuds are heard, a beer bottle falls over, and the refrigerator door opens slightly*
Grunt: "Ahahahaha!"
*splat*
Joker: "My blood! H-he punched out ALL of my blood!"
*thud* *thud* *thump*
Mordin: "Ow, ow ow ow ow! Ouch, ouch! Ahhh..."
*snap*
Zaeed: "You call that breaking my spine? You tank-grown rookie, you wouldn't know how to break a spine if-" *SNAP* "AUGHHH! MY SPINE!"

Modifié par DeinonSlayer, 26 novembre 2013 - 07:10 .

[TheMyron]

DeinonSlayer wrote...

*A large flask sits within the darkness of a closed refrigerator*
Grunt: *groans repeatedly*
Joker: "Yeah, there he is!"
Mordin: "Vat-grown Krogan procuring intoxicant. Insufficient tolerance, aggressive tendencies problematic! Getting away! Must not let him get to the re-"
*Grunt opens the door, grabs the flask of Ryncol and closes the door*
Joker: "D-don't do it, pal!"
Mordin: "Do. Not. Do it!"
Grunt: *chugs* *belches*
Zaeed: "Oohhhhhhh, hell..."
Joker: "H-h-hey, let's just calm down here! You listening? J-j-just... OH GOD!"
Grunt: "Heh... heh... heh..."
*loud footsteps are heard gathering speed*
Joker: "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GO-"
*Several loud thuds are heard, a beer bottle falls over, and the refrigerator door opens slightly*
Grunt: "Ahahahaha!"
*splat*
Joker: "My blood! H-he punched out ALL of my blood!"
*thud* *thud* *thump*
Mordin: "Ow, ow ow ow ow! Ouch, ouch! Ahhh..."
*snap*
Zaeed: "You call that breaking my spine? You tank-grown rookie, you wouldn't know how to break a spine if-" *SNAP* "AUGHHH! MY SPINE!"

LOL, where did this come from?

[ShallowlLife9871]

 Shepard: you don't have to do this!! Together we can defeat the reapers! Please...we can save Humanity!

*Dramitc music* 

TIM: I AM HUMANTIY! and humanity is not mocked! 

Sheaprd: 
TIM: I'll spit your pitty right back in your face!

Shepard:... that's ..gross
Tim: there is nothing on earth that we share! it is ether control or dystroy! 
Catalyist appears:
Catalyist:  however there is a third opptio-
Shepard: *shoot's catalysit* what the freck is going on here?
TIM: now my thoughts lay apon... can shepard be belived???
Sheaprd: yes i can, now let me-
TIM:  I'm reaching, but I fall....and the stars are black, and cold...
Sheaprd: you are makeing no sence:mellow:
TIM: and i stare now into the void, of world that can not hope..
Sheaprd: ok then....

TIM*Pulls out gun* I'll escape now form that world...form the world of Comander Shepard. there is nowhere i can trun... there is no way to go ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *shoots himself*
Shepard: 

Modifié par ShallowlLife9871, 26 novembre 2013 - 08:26 .

[TheMyron]

ShallowlLife9871 wrote...

 Shepard: you don't have to do this!! Together we can defeat the reapers! Please...we can save Humanity!

*Dramitc music* 

TIM: I AM HUMANTIY! and humanity is not mocked! 

Sheaprd: 
TIM: I'll spit your pitty right back in your face!

Shepard:... that's ..gross
Tim: there is nothing on earth that we share! it is ether control or dystroy! 
Catalyist appears:
Catalyist:  however there is a third opptio-
Shepard: *shoot's catalysit* what the freck is going on here?
TIM: now my thoughts lay apon... can shepard be belived???
Sheaprd: yes i can, now let me-
TIM:  I'm reaching, but I fall....and the stars are black, and cold...
Sheaprd: you are makeing no sence:mellow:
TIM: and i stare now into the void, of world that can not hope..
Sheaprd: ok then....

TIM*Pulls out gun* I'll escape now form that world...form the world of Comander Shepard. there is nowhere i can trun... there is no way to go ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *shoots himself*
Shepard: 

Can you at least tell me where you got that from?

[ShallowlLife9871]

Tim's parts are form Javert's Suicide, Les Misérables ... everything else was made up.

[DeinonSlayer]

TheMyron wrote...

DeinonSlayer wrote...

*snip*

LOL, where did this come from?

Team Fortress 2 promotional video, Meet the Sandvich.

Modifié par DeinonSlayer, 26 novembre 2013 - 02:15 .

[Obadiah]

Not really funny, but a spoof from V for Vendetta.

Surviving Destroy Shep with LI

Shep: The problem is that Catalyst knew us better than we knew ourselves.

As it spoke, I suddenly had this feeling that everything was connected. It was like I could see the whole thing, one long chain of events, a cycle of violence, that I could see back from the Leviathan empire. I felt like I could see everything that had happened, and everything that was going to happen. It was like a perfect pattern laid out in front of me.

And I realized that we, Humanity, Leviathan, the Alliance, the Council, the Catalyst, were all part of it, and all trapped by it.

LI: Do you know what will happen?

Shep: No, it was a feeling. That's why I fired that horrible weapon. But I can guess, we'll build Synthetics again, and they will rebel. Maybe there will be peace, and maybe there conflict. But with so much chaos, someone, like Gavin Archer or Xen, will do something stupid.

And when they do, things will turn nasty.

And then our side will be forced to do... the only thing we know how to do.

And then...

Modifié par Obadiah, 28 novembre 2013 - 02:37 .

[Rasofe]

TheMyron wrote...

Rasofe wrote...

On Sanctuary -

Shepard: *Knocks at the door.*
Miranda: Come in!
Shepard: *walks in, looks at Miranda* Trouble with the Crucible.
Miranda: Oh no! What sort of trouble?
Shepard: One of the prothvis has gone lobster in a genship.
Miranda: Pardon?
Shepard: One of the prothvis has gone lobster in genship.
Miranda: I don't understand what you're saying!
Shepard: One of the Prothean V I's has been lost in a gunship!
Miranda: Well what on Earth does that mean!?
Shepard: I don't know! Hackett just told me to come in here and say there was trouble with the Crucible, that's all! I didn't expect the kind of Cerberus inquisition!

*Fanfare as Kai Leng, Oleg Petrovsky and Henry Lawson barge in*
Kai Leng: Nobody Expects the Cerberus Inquisition!
Our chief weapon is surprise! Surprise and fear, fear and surprise! Our two weapons are fear and surprise, and ruthless efficiency. Our three weapons are fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the Illusive Man! Our FOUR... no... Amongst our weaponry are such elements as fear, surp.... I'll come in again.

*The Cerberus Inquisition leaves*

Come on people, I can't get them all, you should a source link just in case...

Monty Python's Flying Circus, the Spanish Inquisition.

[dorktainian]

 Shepard takes time out from redecorating andersons apartment for a little shopping with Joker, and notices a little shop in the corner.  curious he wonders over and sees a copy of fornax in the window.  he walks in and talks to the sales assistant.

"This is a sex shop isn't it?"
Shop Assistant: "Yes."
[slaps money down] "I'll have five quid's worth then! "
Shop Assistant: "Very droll sir, I've never heard that one before. "
JS "Haven't you? Shall I tell it again? "
Shop Assistant: "No thank you sir, I'd rather have a pineapple inserted violently into my rectum."
JS "You've been working here too long mate. "

JS [reads letter] What's this? Annual membership to "EDI's Aerobic Fitness Centre"?
Joker: "Nothing to do with me. "
JS "It's got "Joker" written on it. "
Joker "Ah. Er... "
JS [reads] "Leotard"?
Joker "Well, er, Shepard, none of us are getting any younger. I just pop along every Wednesday afternoon and firm up. "
JS  "What, you stand at the back of a room full of girls jiggling their bottoms up and down and "firm up"?"

[TheMyron]

I was thinking about spoofing this Star Trek Scene, but I am having trouble deciding characters, will someone help me?

Modifié par TheMyron, 06 décembre 2013 - 11:20 .

[TheMyron]

TheMyron wrote...

I was thinking about spoofing this Star Trek Scene, but I am having trouble deciding characters, will someone help me?

Should it be Wrex talking to Jacob, Shepard talking to Jacob, or maybe Wrex talking to Shepard, or what?

[TheMyron]

Fixers0 wrote...

The war is over. The Reapers have been eliminated. And the Cerberus rebellion has been foiled. We stand on the threshold of a new beginning.

The remaining Cerberus Operatives will be hunted down and defeated. Any collaborators will suffer the same fate.

These have been trying times, but we have passed the test. The attempt on my life has left me scarred and deformed. But, I assure you, my resolve has never been stronger.

In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Council will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire for a safe and secure society.

[TheMyron]

DeinonSlayer wrote...

Major Coates: "OK, listen up, dirtbags. If we're gonna reach the Conduit, we need a good game plan. Now, I have two options we can use. Number one, we run at the beam in a single file line, screaming at the top of our lungs! The enemy will be so flabbergasted, by the time they have a chance to regroup, we'll already be inside.

James: Oh, yeah, right. They're not going to get surprised, they're just going to start mowing us down.

Major Coates: That is the inherent beauty of the single file line! They can only kill the person in front. So if we order from least important to most important, with James being in the front and me being in the back, then we just might make it through.

Garrus: Don't you think that Shepard should be in the back, since he's the protagonist?

Major Coates: No, Shepard is in front of me. We need someone in back who can objectively evaluate how the plan is working.

James: How are you going to know if the plan isn't working?

Major Coates: If Shepard gets shot, I'll know we're in trouble, and immediately abort.

Shepard: I think that's a good plan!

VS: Major, while that is the most retarded plan I ever heard, I just wanted to thank you for not putting me in front of the line...

[TheMyron]

[Fill in Character Name]:  You actually think you're *the* Commander Shepard? Oh, all this time I thought you were a clone. Hey guys look, it's the real Commander Shepard!

Shepard: You're mocking me, aren't you?

[FICN]: Oh no, no no no, no. - Commander look, a Reaper!

Shepard: Where?!

[FICN]: (Laughs hoarsely followed by knee slapping)

[Maximillion46]

Okay, first of all, of the top off my head, I'm thinking of The Matrix and I like some of the spoofing you can do with their quotes. Might come up with better ones if I think about some of the movies I've seen, but for now... (link for quotes: http://www.imdb.com/...t0133093/quotes)

Harbinger: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue option - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red option - you stay in your ME fantasy and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes. (Might need some work, didn't go as easy as I thought it would; but it's got heaps for the indoctrination theory, if you feel like throwing that around)

Shepard: Never send a machine to do a human's job.

The Illusive Man: Have you ever had a dream, Shepard, that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to wake from that dream? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the real world?

Starchild: Do not try and defeat the Reaper. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth.
Neo: What truth?
Starchild: There is no Reaper.
Neo: There is no Reaper?
Starchild: Then you'll see, that it is not the Reaper that is destroyed, it is only yourself.

Harbinger: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.

I could go on for ages xD The Matrix and the Indoctrination theory work so well xD so do the machines as antagonists:p

[TheMyron]

Maximillion46 wrote...


Harbinger: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure.

I could go on for ages xD The Matrix and the Indoctrination theory work so well xD so do the machines as antagonists:p

Simple, replace "human" with "organic"

[Maximillion46]

Yes, but comparing an organic with a virus (also organic) and not a mammal as other organics... the comparison falls a bit flat xD

[TheMyron]

Maximillion46 wrote...

Yes, but comparing an organic with a virus (also organic) and not a mammal as other organics... the comparison falls a bit flat xD

But is a virus an Organic Being?

[Maximillion46]

TheMyron wrote...

Maximillion46 wrote...

Yes, but comparing an organic with a virus (also organic) and not a mammal as other organics... the comparison falls a bit flat xD

But is a virus an Organic Being?

Dude that's deep... and a scientific debate xD

Hm, Deus Ex spoof:

Shepard: I never asked for this.
Waitress: *returns red, blue and green-colored beverage*

[Hjklop]

Maximillion46 wrote...


Hm, Deus Ex spoof:

Shepard: I never asked for this.
Waitress: *returns red, blue and green-colored beverage*

That's actually great, I love it

on topic

crowd: all praise Shepard savoir of the citidel!

Shepard's mother: he's not a savoir of the citidel he's a very naughty boy