82 réponses à ce sujet

[Billy-the-Squid]

My dad went to military boarding school, where the cane was the norm, same with humiliating and degrading punishments. Like cut the grass of the football pitch with nail scissors, hold an army boot in each hand with your arms held up. Kneel down and face the wall with your hands behind your head for 2 hours in the corridor so everyone sees what an idiot you are.

So, I'm fairly lucky I got off with a few light slams now and then and things taken away as an exmaple. I see no reason why if I have kids they shouldn't feel the back of my hand when they answer back or any other punishment I feel is appropriate for misbehaviour.

Modifié par Tequila Cat, 22 janvier 2014 - 06:00 .

[spirosz]

Parents tend to be oblivious or just flat out forget that their kids are individuals too, regardless of age.

[Billy-the-Squid]

The Mad Hanar wrote...

Last night on Facebook my lil twelve year old cousin went on this curse filled rant about how she hates school and her teachers. That led to a few of my family members to call her out on it, and they told her to watch her language. Her grandmother (who raises her) took to defending her on the lil girl's post, and creating a status message calling all of the family member's out for trying to control her style of parenting and trying to control her granddaughter. The lil girl is a bit of a brat. She doesn't listen to anybody; she bullies kids at school; she's not thankful for anything, and she apparently has a potty mouth. She is given anything she wants, and if she doesn't she throws public temper tantrums. The girl has diabetes because her grandmother, bless her soul, can't say no to her granddaughter when she wants to eat nothing but junk food. The grandmother and mother don't like me because I'm one of the few people with enough balls to yell at the little kid when she's acting up, and I'm one of the few to tell them to f off with their bs.

Essentially, this is the type of parenting I imagine when I see little brats in the store who act up because they know their parents will give in. Me? If I cursed, then I got spanked. If I talked back, then I got the look warning me that I better not do it again. If I wanted something, then I had to work for it. I learned that if I show people respect, then I will get what I want while being a decent human being at the same time.

Is it a coincidence that I'm not a ****head and she's is? I don't think so.

I'd have back handed her across the face by now. Next time she'll think twice before answering rudely or swearing after she's been given a fat lip.

When my brother was young he picked up the habit of spitting, from some vile kid in school. First time he tried it I slammed him across the mouth, he never did it again.

[Cyonan]

Kids should be punished when they do something wrong but I don't believe in using fear to control people, which is what physical punishment really is when you get down to it.

As far as the schools are concerned though, they have no business deciding what's best for other people's kids in terms of punishing them when they do wrong. They're there to educate then, not beat them into submission.

[ruggly]

My dad would whip out the wooden spoon or spank my brother and I if we acted up.

[ObserverStatus]

Suprez30 wrote...
It's funny. I have no opinion on this. Why should we always have an opinion about everything ?

You don't need to post on everything either, and yet here you are.

[SlottsMachine]

J. Reezy wrote...

Cyonan wrote...

Kids should be punished when they do something wrong but I don't believe in using fear to control people, which is what physical punishment really is when you get down to it.

What else do you use if not fear? I'm not saying to just resort to physical punishment but how can you not use fear in some way? Afraid of physical pain, afraid of disappointment, afraid of a lack of entertainment, afraid of a lack of your favorite food, etc. Fear of the consequences, physical or no, kept me in line.

Emphasis on the bolded. This is basically the number one rule that govern's society. 

[DarkDragon777]

Do you think parents hit their kids with good intentions or to take out their anger? That's all that needs to be said.

[sandalisthemaker]

I was a rather sweet, innocent, and obedient child growing up. Rarely ever got punished because I rarely needed it.

But I believe kids should be spanked if need be, accompanied by a stern talking to. A child should never be smacked in the face, however. Smacking their hands or a spank to the butt should suffice.

Modifié par sandalisthemaker, 22 janvier 2014 - 06:31 .

[Captain Obvious]

Darth Brotarian wrote...

I think feeling like we need to respect every child no matter what is getting to ridiculous degrees and actually damaging our kids. Like how some schools banned Christmas from being said or celebrated in schools so thst kids of other religions wouldn't be offended.

Were sheltering our kids to intellectual and emotional death.

If you're talking about public schools, that's because it's unconstitutional. Also, Christian or whatever major religous group shouldn't recieve special treatment or appeasement over other religious groups. They can deal with Christmas not being celebrated in school. If not, then they'll learn how to. Might harden them up a bit.

Modifié par Cap. Obvious, 22 janvier 2014 - 06:54 .

[RedArmyShogun]

They all need beatings

[Naughty Bear]

My mum chased me with a coat hanger or would pull my ear, my dad would shut me in the dark (was seriously scared of the dark).

[Maria Caliban]

No.

As for corporal punishment, which this thread seems to be focusing on, the use of physical punishment on children leads them to be more violent in their interactions with others. They're more likely to get into fights, bully others, or destroy/deface property.

There are a wide range of ways to discipline a child that don't involve actual hitting.

Modifié par Maria Caliban, 22 janvier 2014 - 07:00 .

[Kaiser Arian XVII]

I like this thread. Our front (Op, I, happy_daiz, Tequila Cat and others) is SO stronger than our opponents'.

[LiL Reapur]

I got beat as a kid but not that much, but if i have kids i'm not going to do the same to them i'll find out another way........

[AventuroLegendary]

happy_daiz wrote...

LegendaryAvenger wrote...

Physical pain isn't the only method of "effective" punishment. Rather than being scared of your father's belt, you can be frightened of a half-empty stomach. Or toilet duty.

Well, in my case, it wasn't the belt itself that kept me in line; it was the fear of my dad using it. There was more to it than fearing an authority figure, or physical pain caused from the object itself. I did not want to see that look of disappointment on his face.

I...was a bit of a mushy, sentimental kid.

That's the same story for me. I've always been a bit of a softy and my parents used that to their advantage, to spare themselves the trouble of actual discipline (most of the time). 

It takes a while to actually get the implication across to the kid, from what I've seen of most starting families.

[Cainhurst Crow]

Cap. Obvious wrote...

Darth Brotarian wrote...

I think feeling like we need to respect every child no matter what is getting to ridiculous degrees and actually damaging our kids. Like how some schools banned Christmas from being said or celebrated in schools so thst kids of other religions wouldn't be offended.

Were sheltering our kids to intellectual and emotional death.

If you're talking about public schools, that's because it's unconstitutional. Also, Christian or whatever major religous group shouldn't recieve special treatment or appeasement over other religious groups. They can deal with Christmas not being celebrated in school. If not, then they'll learn how to. Might harden them up a bit.

Wow. And I thought I was a troll. But anti-christmas,  just damn.

[Russalka]

Young people have always been horrible.

[Cyonan]

J. Reezy wrote...

Cyonan wrote...

Kids should be punished when they do something wrong but I don't believe in using fear to control people, which is what physical punishment really is when you get down to it.

What else do you use if not fear? I'm not saying to just resort to physical punishment but how can you not use fear in some way? Afraid of physical pain, afraid of disappointment, afraid of a lack of entertainment, afraid of a lack of your favorite food, etc. Fear of the consequences, physical or no, kept me in line.

It's a weird line, as I imagine you could turn just about anything back to doing it out of a fear of what happens if you don't, even as adults. We all work because we essentially fear not having enough money for food and shelter.

On the other hand, while I was growing up it was more done in a way that was rewarding me for going good things rather than punishing me for bad things. Of course, in a lot of cases the punishment was still essentially the same thing just worded differently, but it's still not actively trying to scare me into doing what they want.

For physical punishment, I consider that to be beating somebody who can't fight back which is a cowardly act. People in favour of it like to talk a lot about respect, but as far as I'm concerned those people don't really deserve my respect.

[Overdosing]

Depending on the situation presented, there are times when parents can be too harsh in some cases and too soft on others.

[spirosz]

Russalka wrote...

Young people have always been horrible.

So I guess you were too. 

[mybudgee]

I am a father and I have always believed in occasional spankings. Physical punishment is not the same as discipline. As many of you have already stated, fear must not be the foundation of a child's relationship to their parent. It must be respect and love, with a dash of fear. If no form of discipline works, there is a reason; some event occurred which made the parent seem powerless and weak in the child's eyes.
Like all aspects of a functional family, there must be balance. If balance is not a goal, reaching one end of the spectrum or the other is inevitable. We all know (or used to know) a child like this. They sass and backtalk their parents at such an early age or to such a degree that it makes strangers uncomfortable. The other end is the parent who is looking for a reason to hand out a beating, the child is always making up stories about falling or walking into doors.
I have yet to spank my younger son, but my eldest son talks about the one time I whooped him as if it were a tale of seeing Bigfoot or something. They are wonderful boys.