Who says they can't be both? There's plenty of attractive ladies who are powerful, scary, intimidating, etc.
while men are many things
But they are always both, or just pretty. I am really annoyed Wynne cant look old, I mean actually old with realistic wrinkles, but Duncan can. That every Qunari woman concept art is the build of an athletic human woman. Smooth faces everywhere and strap bras that would never work "realistically".
It is a requirement in every media for a woman to be beautiful. Yes of course women can be powerful and pretty, but why cant they be portrayed likable and powerful and not pretty? Flemeth as soon as she became major player had a huge overhaul.
Tali was considered not human enough to be revealed. She was too alien. So they made them human looking. It is a major thing keeping women apart from men is this standard all women have to live up to, which fortifies the idea that women are one thing while men are many things. Even Aveline who is hardly down and out ugly, is worried about her looks because yeah, all women need to be pretty. For men, they can just be powerful, but women need to be powerful AND pretty.
I mean 1000 year old Asari just get bigger boobs. And the 1 Turian woman died and the Krogan women greatest dream was to have babies (not saying it didnt make sense with the plot but still). Of the women unavailable to romance in dragon age, Wynne, Sigrun, Velanna, And Aveline (which is fewer than non romanceable guys of 7 because without being romanceable few people see a reason in female characters) they are all fairly pretty or cute, all are fairly smooth faced, and fairly conventionally pretty. Sigrun less so but instead is about being super cute. Compare to Oghren, Justice, Sten in Origins, Wrex, Garrus, Grunt.
I want some characters to be downright not pretty at all, not just in Bioware but the media in general.