14909 réponses à ce sujet

[Hanako Ikezawa]

 

It would really depend on the situation.

The situation shouldn't matter. You either are willing to help those in dire need of it, or you aren't. 

 

 

He might have been afraid of getting into trouble or wasting someone's time.  A lot of kids have that sense of authority drummed into them and a fear of rocking the boat by speaking up.  I remember seeing an injured cat once.  I wanted to run home and tell my parents so they could help the poor thing, but I was too scared to miss the bus and get into trouble at school.  I guess I was too afraid to take any kind of action by myself as I was too used to being told what to do.  It took me until my 20s to be able to speak up and say what I wanted.  I still feel guilty about the cat on occasion.  

He didn't have any such excuse though. He didn't have to be anywhere else or do anything else.  He just left it to die and went inside.

[veeia]

I was a coward who ran away from problems until I was like...24. I have all the sympathy in the world for it, and how terrible it feels, and how awful you can be with good intentions and a weak will. Probably why I wouldn't excuse him for it either. Maybe there wasn't a way in the world he could ever have done differently, but that choice still did exist, whether he could see it or not. At least coming from me, it's not a judgment to say he did the wrong thing. It's just an observation, backed up with a lot of empathy. And overprojecting I'm sure.

[Milan92]

The situation shouldn't matter. You either are willing to help those in dire need of it, or you aren't.

No, it doesnt work like that.

[I SOLD MY SOUL TO BIOWARE]

The situation shouldn't matter. You either are willing to help those in dire need of it, or you aren't. 
 

Or you think you're willing to help, but when the time comes you end up doing nothing. You can think you're willing to step up all you want, doesn't mean much when you actually have to.

Horrible as it was, Blackwall's dog story was a pretty damn good example that humans aren't perfect or black and white in terms of do good, do bad. Some people just end up doing nothing at all.

[Hanako Ikezawa]

No, it doesnt work like that.

Or you think you're willing to help, but when the time comes you end up doing nothing. You can think you're willing to step up all you want, doesn't mean much when you actually have to.

Horrible as it was, Blackwall's dog story was a pretty damn good example that humans aren't perfect or black and white in terms of do good, do bad. Some people just end up doing nothing at all.

Then they are the latter. Someone who only helps others when it benefits them. 

[raging_monkey]

Then they are the latter. Someone who only helps others when it benefits them.

not that simple. And almost noone is truly altruistic their always some profit

[Basement Cat]

not that simple. And almost noone is truly altruistic their always some profit

There is also fear to consider. In Blackwall's dog story: what if the kids attack him? What if he makes it worse? What if he's too late? 

 

Lots of people don't act because they are afraid to do so. And in many cases that fear is justified. If someone is being mugged, for example, it's easy to say: I would step in! But what about when you are really in that situation? It's very different then because of the emotional overload it causes. Then there are situations when we're just not sure what to do. Will my help be welcome or will I be seen as a busybody who should mind their own business?

 

As for the profit angle, for some people it's really because helping people makes them feel good about themselves. So the 'profit' is not always material, but there is something gotten out of it, even if it's just the feeling of having done the right thing. We rarely do things we don't like unless there is some kind of reason. Be it a sense of obligation, fear, affection, etc.

[ruggly]

Blackwall has always just been kind of there, but he's starting to grow on me.  That glorious beard, it has all of the power.

 

[veeia]

You actually should not step in when someone is being mugged. Fear can cause muggers to escalate in violence, and it's always preferable to have your wallet stolen than be stabbed.

 

I really hope I can trigger this convo soon because I don't feel comfortable arguing about the specifics until I have seen it. Situation and context matters, attitudes can be justified, but at the end of the day, you have to live with what you've done (or not done), and know that it's less than what you'd want, even if its not something you could have realistically done

 

...and if you never act towards your beliefs, you don't know if they are unattainable, which is how I see Blackwall in that conversation. He doesn't really know what he could have reasonably expected himself to do, because his view of the world is SO extreme black and white that he makes any good action too far away, placing himself already in the bad category. He doesn't want to reflect, he wants to punish and categorize.  But then he immediately says "eff it", and does a noble action as himself, the flawed fallen man, which is his first step towards not having such an limited view of the world. 

[Ryzaki]

Okay really?

 

We're blaming child Blackwall for doing nothing out of fear? He's human. Humans aren't Superman. Sometimes we stand by and let some crappy things happen out of fear.

 

It wasn't malice and that's enough for me.

[Ryzaki]

He might have been afraid of getting into trouble or wasting someone's time.  A lot of kids have that sense of authority drummed into them and a fear of rocking the boat by speaking up.  I remember seeing an injured cat once.  I wanted to run home and tell my parents so they could help the poor thing, but I was too scared to miss the bus and get into trouble at school.  I guess I was too afraid to take any kind of action by myself as I was too used to being told what to do.  It took me until my 20s to be able to speak up and say what I wanted.  I still feel guilty about the cat on occasion.  

 

Ugh something similar happened to me when I was a kid. But it was a kitten and to make it worse I asked my grams what she would've done (after I came back home and saw it wasn't there anymore) and she went "took it to the vet and drove you to school." so I felt like a douche and an idiot.

 

[Mariefoxprice83]

Ugh something similar happened to me when I was a kid. But it was a kitten and to make it worse I asked my grams what she would've done (after I came back home and saw it wasn't there anymore) and she went "took it to the vet and drove you to school." so I felt like a douche and an idiot.

 

 I guess we are conditioned to follow certain rules no matter what.  I'm sure some people in Thedas are too, even though their customs are so different to ours.  But I don't think it makes a person bad in that situation, not at all.  A bad person would have enjoyed the spectacle, and Blackwall didn't.

[veeia]

Are you talking to me? I am not blaming him, lmao, just saying that I think its healthier, esp for him, to process it as a more complex issue than "I had no choice, I did nothing wrong " or "I had the choice and there was nothing stopping me and I didn't take it because awful" especially because he's relating it to his current situation.

..I also have no idea how old he was during this, does he say it?

[Ryzaki]

Are you talking to me? I am not blaming him, lmao, just saying that I think its healthier, esp for him, to process it as a more complex issue than "I had no choice, I did nothing wrong " or "I had the choice and there was nothing stopping me and I didn't take it because awful" especially because he's relating it to his current situation.

..I also have no idea how old he was during this, does he say it?

 

my fault I should've been a bit clearer. no not you.

 

 

He was a kid.

 

 I guess we are conditioned to follow certain rules no matter what.  I'm sure some people in Thedas are too, even though their customs are so different to ours.  But I don't think it makes a person bad in that situation, not at all.  A bad person would have enjoyed the spectacle, and Blackwall didn't.

 

Yep =/

 

Exactly it wasn't malice and that's enough for me.

[Basement Cat]

Okay really?

 

We're blaming child Blackwall for doing nothing out of fear? He's human. Humans aren't Superman. Sometimes we stand by and let some crappy things happen out of fear.

 

It wasn't malice and that's enough for me.

I wasn't blaming, I was giving a possible explanation. It's easy to play the blame game when one is not in the situation. Fear is the most likely explanation in this case because he has a big 'I should have' trauma related to it. If he didn't care, he wouldn't feel bad about it.

[veeia]

Yup, you can feel bad about things you have no control over. I don't know if he felt like he could have done anything, but feeling powerless and turning that into self-hatred is super common. 

[Ryzaki]

I wasn't blaming, I was giving a possible explanation. It's easy to play the blame game when one is not in the situation. Fear is the most likely explanation in this case because he has a big 'I should have' trauma related to it. If he didn't care, he wouldn't feel bad about it.

 

Agreed. And sorry

[Cypher0020]

Question has anyone romance him?

 

I just can't think of a quizzy who can.... like..... arrrrrrgh.

[Basement Cat]

Yup, you can feel bad about things you have no control over. I don't know if he felt like he could have done anything, but feeling powerless and turning that into self-hatred is super common. 

It happens all the time. It goes from the most innocuous thing (I should have planned for the grocery store running out of chocolate milk!) to the most horrible (I should have been a better parent!). According to psychologists, it's a defense mechanism. It's very traumatic to be in a situation where we have no control, and people blame themselves because it's easier to accept the idea that we did something wrong (even if we didn't) than the idea that there was nothing we could have done. You see it all the time with victims of violent crime or serious accidents.

 

Sometimes we're in the wrong place at the wrong time and we freeze. It's human.

[Basement Cat]

Agreed. And sorry

That's alright. I understand wanting to protect our waifus/husbandos.

[veeia]

Question has anyone romance him?

 

I just can't think of a quizzy who can.... like..... arrrrrrgh.

 

Lmfao, yes, many of us have. What is your specific issue? Maybe we can help you find a character for him.  

[Cypher0020]

Thank you  

 

Well to me, he's just sorta 'there' I forgot about him quickly.

 

My female elf went with cullen, my female qunari will go with Iron bull, my male characters with Cass/Josie

[Ryzaki]

Question has anyone romance him?

 

I just can't think of a quizzy who can.... like..... arrrrrrgh.

 

Eh for me it usually helps to make a Quizzy I'm not very sympathetic of to begin with.

 

But no I only romanced him once (going on twice now) and I'm still here

[veeia]

Thank you

 

Well to me, he's just sorta 'there' I forgot about him quickly.

 

My female elf went with cullen, my female qunari will go with Iron bull, my male characters with Cass/Josie

 

Go with a lady dwarf (you get special fun dialogue there), pick snarky options with him (he does have a sense of humor, I promise), take him out with Sera (for the hilarious jokes), and maybe he'll sing to you more. But perhaps he's just not your cup of tea...although he does escalate from "chill dude who stands around there" to DRAMMMAAACOASTERRR OF LOOOVVEEE pretty quickly, if that helps?  

[Cypher0020]

actually one of my  lady dwarf's is gonna go with Bull lol

 

I never finishe a human female..... I planne her to be with Cullen....but I suppose she can go with him, since y'know 'warden' an' all

 

Then she's torn... since...growing up in a Chantry home, she's be like an utter fangirl to Cullen, being a famous templar, but....Blackwall is famous too