This is how it worked for me: We got to Skyhold, talked to him and got the scene on the battlements where he pushes you away. Then I went out into the world, did some stuff, went to talk to him again and it triggered a cutscene where he tells you about the Grand Tourney and the old chevalier. Then straight after that cutscene, I clicked on him again and he apologised for 'pushing me away', but if I was agreeable he would show me why - then I got the Explanations quest in my log, went to the Storm Coast with him and upon return to Skyhold got the cutscene in the Inquisitor's room, and the romance started officially. All this was before doing WEWH or Here Lies the Abyss.
Edit: may be an obvious thing to say, but I'm not sure if you need a certain level of approval to trigger all the scenes - I would imagine that you do.
Edit 2: IIRC, all the Revelations (ie the leaving) stuff only occurs after the Siege of Adamant in the Here Lies the Abyss main mission
I know, this is how I played my first run, I was just curious to know what happens if you do the WEWH before the romance starts ;P





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