Hm. The thread's really exploded since I last read it.
I've seen some very compelling arguments from people on both sides. I can't at all argue that maybe the "playersexual" thing does cheapen non-straight sexuality, though I don't think most people are going to think people's gender preference is going to bend to their will in the real world.
Ideally, we'd all get at least two LIs, two straight, two gay, two bi, with bisexual players getting the biggest range. The playersexual thing does enable everyone to have the option of going after anyone, which is a mixed bag really. I mean I like the idea so people don't complain--some people refuse to play the opposite sex at all. I do so rarely. What if the only male character I like is strictly gay? Yes, too bad, deal with it. Except that it's a game, and isn't it supposed to be about having fun? And yet, if that isn't who the character is, should they bend to my will as the player?
So now I'm just kind of torn. I still don't think the "playersexual" thing is really inherently bad, though intent isn't magic. It gives everyone every option. Yes, it might be better to just make them automatically bisexual, but then you'd have players who didn't think the men were manly enough or didn't like the idea their girlfriend had been with dudes. Sad but true. And, in a singleplayer RPG, the player basically IS the center of the universe, let's face it.
My thought is that when you start that game, the given character is already whatever preference is attracted to the player character. Which is indeed somewhat problematic, though it gives everyone the same number of choices (and choices are good). But it would be more problematic if a gay character were to turn straight for the player during the actual playthrough.
And I didn't realize that I'd missed out on Anders having a gay lover; that really shouldn't have been removed for the sake of female players. If you're going to make everyone equally romanceable to everyone, you need to do so in such a way that, although they may react differently to different genders, the content for those LIs is more or less the same. This also means that the romances need to be written equally well for either gender. No more "Well, Fenris was better for men, and Merrill was better for women..."
There's no way to make everyone happy. and someone's going to be offended no matter what Bioware does. I'm not even sure if there's really an objectively fair way to do this, and still stick to the budget. And yet I don't think it's fair to limit or take away anyone's options. I had that done to my straight female Shepard in ME3, and again, I'm glad I'd romanced Garrus and left Kaidan alive. Otherwise, I'd have had no one.
I don't want other people to suddenly lose an option, and the "playersexual" way seems to be the only way to ensure that. For that reason I still back it, but I think maybe it needs to be presented, or done differently, so that it doesn't give the notion that gender preference can be flipped like a switch to suit the player. I do agree that sexuality is something you're born with, or at the very least something that develops naturally by the time you reach adolescence--not something wrong with the person, and not caused by how they're raised.
I'm not even sure if a roster of 6 LIs with a 2/2/2 split would be fair at this point, even if it would make sense.