Anders' romance is so ridiculous at times that I'm quite convinced Varric is inventing most of it.
I've never thought of that. Well, now I will just pretend that's why it is how it is. Varric really did not like Anders, anyway, so I can see him changing the story to make him sound more dramatic than he already was. I liked Anders as a character (even if I don't ever not kill him in my playthroughs... but that's just a show of good writing) but as a romance, he was pure fodder. I love Hepler (she wrote Deep Roads plot-line so she's a genius) so I don't hold this against her beautiful self. Lol.
I hope to the MAKER that we don't get Dorian speaking goose-tripe in a woobie tone like,
"My heart beats only for you, Inquisitor!"
[proceeds to swoon over him and rub his cheek against Inquisitor's manly chest hair] "YOU WILL ALWAYS CATCH ME WHEN I FALL, WONT YOU?"
[does silly little lovey-dovey giggle that breaks immersion]
I get enough of that from my crappy regency romance novels, thank you. Me too. Well, me three, I guess.
But... the disappointment.... *sigh*
Citadel DLC was just fanservice and I
hated it. It was filled to the brim with silliness and it ruined the tone of the game, imo. A few cute jokes here and there, but an entire mission? That, and none of the romance scenes were good. They were all way too corny for my liking and filled with sickly sweetness that was better suited to an ABC family movie. Shepard became the butt of all jokes and became this absolute wanker who struts down a red carpet and decides to buy a sweet apartment the night before a massive battle that will decide the fate of the entire universe. Not to mention whenever FemShep put her flirt voice on, it sounded really sleazy. Seriously, HATED it.
Not to mention Thane's entire... everything in ME3 was excruciating. Let's not even mention Jacob, wtf.
OKAY SORRY ENOUGH FROM ME. SO OT.
DAI will not have this. I refuse to believe it. DA2's DLCs were great. They had their cute in-jokes but the DLCs remained entirely relevant and furthered the lore and/or story with Hawke.
EDIT: Kaiden's romance cutscene was okay, actually...