You're not a coward. That's certainly not what I meant to imply. I have nothing but sympathy for you. It's a horrible situation that no one should have to find themselves in just for being the way they are. Certainly not when being the way they are does no harm to anyone.
I know you weren't implying that, hence the "some might say" and not the "you might say": big difference. You also have my thanks (and you too, Serza) for being so understanding.
It depends expecially on the nature of those around you, at least in my experience. I'm pretty sure my life would go from "average" to "welcome to hell" in 0.5 seconds if I was foolish enough to tell my family who I truly am.
Some might say I'm a coward, I say that I'd rather a "live today and fight tomorrow" approach than a "die, end of story" one. Besides, it's not like it's easy to hide an important part of you from the very people who, theoretically, should love you and support you almost unconditionally: it's exausting, to say the least.
Fook anyone that says you're a coward. It's your decision.
I wasn't going to tell my parents that i'm gay, since it was none of their business about who I bed but they kept bugging me about boys and how "hawt" they are and kept saying that i don't care. (i was dropping so many hints and they couldn't get it for years 
)
Then one day i got so tired of the pressure and I lost it. It was also the scariest/happiest moment of my life. Scariest because i instantly realized that they could do something horrible like get me to a stupid doctor or not talking to me ever and hate me. And then happiest because, my mom got a lil shocked and started the typical "how, when, why and my favorite: "How can you know if you've never met a boy" Ahhh. And my dad was like "Better, boys are horrible".
And the funny thing is my parents kept saying how homosexuals aren't normal etc etc before my coming out and now they don't curr anymore and became more open minded (especially my mom tbh).
Life is full of surprises. 
Fook anyone that says you're a coward. It's your decision.
I wasn't going to tell my parents that i'm gay, since it was none of their business about who I bed but they kept bugging me about boys and how "hawt" they are and kept saying that i don't care. (i was dropping so many hints and they couldn't get it for years
Then one day i got so tired of the pressure and I lost it. It was also the scariest/happiest moment of my life. Scariest because i instantly realized that they could do something horrible like get me to a stupid doctor or not talking to me ever and hate me. And then happiest because, my mom got a lil shocked and started the typical "how, when, why and my favorite: "How can you know if you've never met a boy" Ahhh. And my dad was like "Better, boys are horrible".
And the funny thing is my parents kept saying how homosexuals aren't normal etc etc before my coming out and now they don't curr anymore and became more open minded (especially my mom tbh).
Life is full of surprises.
Thank you.
I'm glad it ended up well for you. 
On the other hand, my parents have a high chance of not being so understanding. Honestly, if the worst thing they could do was to stop talking to me, I'd have already told them; but I'm reasonably sure they wouldn't stop at that and the consequences wouldn't be...pleasant. So yeah, I'm not going to tell them anything until I'm in a position where I'm 100% sure that they can't hurt me.
Guest_Danielle100_*
I can certainly relate to what you are saying I knew how my family would react and if I had any choice I may have made a different decision but due to physical changes and rules of transitioning I didn't have a choice. I think that there are many indicators growing up as to how family will react and I agree with what you've said. I certainly don't consider you a coward nor do I consider what I did to be brave as I did it to survive.It depends expecially on the nature of those around you, at least in my experience. I'm pretty sure my life would go from "average" to "welcome to hell" in 0.5 seconds if I was foolish enough to tell my family who I truly am.
Some might say I'm a coward, I say that I'd rather a "live today and fight tomorrow" approach than a "die, end of story" one. Besides, it's not like it's easy to hide an important part of you from the very people who, theoretically, should love you and support you almost unconditionally: it's exausting, to say the least.
On the other hand, my parents have a high chance of not being so understanding. Honestly, if the worst thing they could do was to stop talking to me, I'd have already told them; but I'm reasonably sure they wouldn't stop at that and the consequences wouldn't be...pleasant. So yeah, I'm not going to tell them anything until I'm in a position where I'm 100% sure that they can't hurt me.
100% with you on this. My parents were exactly like yours, they were pretty homophobic back then.
I guess i got lucky. The parents that are worth to have, are the ones who accept you and your choices in life, in general.
Guest_Danielle100_*
Guest_StreetMagic_*
I'm cold, I've been at work for over an hour and still cold it's 16 F , -9 C if I got the conversion right. Burrrr.
My power shut down earlier and tried to sleep through some bad weather with no heater/AC.
I ended up calling a 24 hour electrician lol
I can certainly relate to what you are saying I knew how my family would react and if I had any choice I may have made a different decision but due to physical changes and rules of transitioning I didn't have a choice. I think that there are many indicators growing up as to how family will react and I agree with what you've said. I certainly don't consider you a coward nor do I consider what I did to be brave as I did it to survive.
You did it for the most practical reason imaginable: your own survival. All in spite of the continued disapproval of those closest to you. I'm pretty sure that's the definition of bravery.
man im cold just imagining thatI'm cold, I've been at work for over an hour and still cold it's 16 F , -9 C if I got the conversion right. Burrrr.
I can certainly relate to what you are saying I knew how my family would react and if I had any choice I may have made a different decision but due to physical changes and rules of transitioning I didn't have a choice. I think that there are many indicators growing up as to how family will react and I agree with what you've said. I certainly don't consider you a coward nor do I consider what I did to be brave as I did it to survive.
It must have been way, way more difficutl for you, and I'm sorry for what you had to go through, it's awful when the very people who should love you without question basically disowns you just because you are not what they want you to be.
For what it's worth, I think you are a wonderful person, and those who abandoned you are not deserving of your affection.
And you are brave: you did what you had to in order to survive, despite the constant lack of support from those who should have supported you the most. That's bravery, as far as I'm concerned.
100% with you on this. My parents were exactly like yours, they were pretty homophobic back then.
I guess i got lucky. The parents that are worth to have, are the ones who accept you and your choices in life, in general.
Thank you, seriously. I mean it.
And I agree with what you said.
Wow. I'm not sure what I was expecting when I posted my comment about bravery, but I'm kind of glad I did. Thanks for sharing your feelings and stories, all. I still think that you're all brave, in your own way, Artemis included. It angers me that anyone should have to go through all that fear and uncertainty, especially with those who are supposed to love you most.
1942. Philippines. The assassination of R: Heydrich. El Alamein. Guadalcanal. Midway. I need not go on.
Have some more related music:
(Just by the way, I already know what songs I'll use for '43 and '44 with operations Gunnerside and Overlord, respectively.)
Wow. I'm not sure what I was expecting when I posted my comment about bravery, but I'm kind of glad I did. Thanks for sharing your feelings and stories, all. I still think that you're all brave, in your own way, Artemis included. It angers me that anyone should have to go through all that fear and uncertainty, especially with those who are supposed to love you most.
I'm glad you did too. See, this is why I love this thread and expecially those who post regularly in it: it feels safe, it feels home, it's a place where everyone is accepted for who they are. So, thank you Uncle, Danielle, WildOrchid, Serza, and everyone else. You ladies and gents are the best, and I truly mean it. 
we are family its what we doI'm glad you did too. See, this is why I love this thread and expecially those who post regularly in it: it feels safe, it feels home, it's a place where everyone is accepted for who they are. So, thank you Uncle, Danielle, WildOrchid, Serza, and everyone else. You ladies and gents are the best, and I truly mean it.
I'm glad that you at least have somewhere that you feel comfortable being who you are, and I wish you all the best in finding such a safe place in real life.
I'm glad you did too. See, this is why I love this thread and expecially those who post regularly in it: it feels safe, it feels home, it's a place where everyone is accepted for who they are. So, thank you Uncle, Danielle, WildOrchid, Serza, and everyone else. You ladies and gents are the best, and I truly mean it.
I'm glad you did too. See, this is why I love this thread and expecially those who post regularly in it: it feels safe, it feels home, it's a place where everyone is accepted for who they are. So, thank you Uncle, Danielle, WildOrchid, Serza, and everyone else. You ladies and gents are the best, and I truly mean it.
Like Monkey said, we are family. We will be there for you, through thick and thin, even when those closest to you cannot be. We're the immovable pillar, we will always be here to hold you up. 
yup we stick togetherLike Monkey said, we are family. We will be there for you, through thick and thin, even when those closest to you cannot be. We're the immovable pillar, we will always be here to hold you up.
Since we're sharing coming out stories.
Some context first: I was a pretty isolated teenager and I spent a lot of time with my mother. I was a constant companion for her and we had a really good relationship. We're on the same wave length. We understand each other. When I moved away, it was a huge loss for her. Then there is my grand mother who was a horribly selfish person who once said I should go ahead and kill myself because I talked back to her once. (she had used a bad word and I had called her on it). I was fifteen. My grandmother was a horribly selfish person who emotionally abused my mother and aunt through their childhoods. She's one of those 'children must obey their parents in all things' type. This is important.
Now:
I had been living on my own for a while and I would occasionally drop hints or talk about LGBT stuff to my parents, hoping they would clue in. We'd been dancing around the issue a while, and then there were a couple of 'incidents'.
The first one was when I decided to cut my hair really short (buzz cut) and I told my mom. She completely flipped and started ranting that 'no boy would ever want me' and that i would be 'forever alone', etc. I hung up on her.
Later, my parents came for a visit and we played a game of Life. At one point in the game you 'get married' and my dad thought he would be funny by getting a gay marriage. No problem so far, but then he proceeded to have the worst luck ever and lost his job twice (in the game). My mom then said 'that's what you get for being a degenerate'. I was not amused and I scolded her for it. The parting was rather cold.
Finally, another phone call. I forget what exactly I talked about with my mom, but she said something really homophobic and I just lost it. I said that if she had such a big problem with gays then she probably didn't want to talk to me anymore. I told her I didn't want a boyfriend, I didn't want kids and I didn't want her judging me and that I didn't want to speak to her ever again and I hung up. My mom knew the threat was genuine because I'd stopped speaking to my grandmother after the debacle.
We didn't speak for months, but one day I got a call from my grandmother begging me to call my mother because she was so sorry and unhappy. I was a little shocked, to be honest, but I did call my mom. She assured me that she loved me and that it didn't matter and that she was so sorry for all the awful things she had said.
We have made up since then. Except now she asks me about girls instead of boys. 
So, it's a happy ending, but let me tell you, those months of silence were the worst of my life.
We have made up since then. Except now she asks me about girls instead of boys.
I bet. I couldn't imagine not talking to my mom for months on end. Glad you got it worked out.
We have made up since then. Except now she asks me about girls instead of boys.
Lucky for you, my mom never asks me about girls lmao.
Lucky for you, my mom never asks me about girls lmao.
Well, my mom shares my predilection for analysis, and for her it's a way to discover an aspect of me that she didn't know. She was rather amused by the fact I don't care for blondes.
*sigh* Don't you just hate eating porridge and the sugar runs out.
Well, my mom shares my predilection for analysis, and for her it's a way to discover an aspect of me that she didn't know. She was rather amused by the fact I don't care for blondes.
*Sera slightly disapproves*
*sigh* Don't you just hate eating porridge and the sugar runs out.
No other source of sweetness in the house/apartment? Honey? Molasses?
Or you could try a savory porridge. It's quite tasty with tomato sauce.
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