I am really surprised someone who's in your line of work sees Alistair as revolting, child little puss and nasty among other things. You of all people should understand where he comes from. Knows the absolute attachment most abused kids develops to the first person whos given them kindness. Some of them develops obsessive unatural attachments that we always have to investigate if there was any grooming involved. The effect on alistair is deffo much much more subdued to most of the cases I've handled. And makes him alot stronger and more mature than most.
And he is barely out of his teens plus considering his background which added to his naivety.... yes he is still pretty much understandably a child. A child who I pretty much want to drop kick because I want to save the anvil for example. But the landsmeet is pretty much alistair. Hate it or love it. I hated it cuz im such a controlling biiatch who likes to be followed and did not like anyone gainsaying me specially when im the boss in my game. Even if I agree with him.
I understand where he comes from and I totally get it BUT there is a huge difference between knowing what people are like and dealing with them on a professional basis and wanting someone like alistair in my life as a romance. Alistair has MANY flaws and I overlook them as it is a game. But in real life, let's face it... I would dump his ass in very short order. Why? Let's see... incessant whining about his royal blood, very weird and UNHEALTHY attachment to a guy who clearly was just doing his job and did not feel as alistair did. That's a massive red flag right there. He doesn't even realize Duncan recruited him because he would be useful and because he could. Duncan doesn't give a single thought about alistair. It's very clear that this is not a two way thing. So it shows how alistair is not an emotionally healthy person to have this sort of weird attachment. I understand why, but again, it's not attractive at all. If anything, in real life this would be extremely disconcerting to me if I was involved with someone who had a relationship like this. Also, alistair is extremely naive about nearly everything, very sheltered and can be quite juvenile at times. This may be because I am more mature and insightful than the average gamer, but while it's okay and easy to write off for a game since I don't really have to deal with him in real life, it would be the last sort of thing I'd want to have in a relationship.... friendship or romantic. He lacks maturity. He can't even answer questions with straight answers which gets old really fast. He's got that unhealthy attachment to Duncan that is not both ways. He is naive. He cannot admit how he really feels about the Wardens and is in deep denial about it - the only place you see it is in the fade. He whines about his royal blood and is far too poor me for me to really want to bother with that..... it's just a massive list. Oh and you can't even disagree with him without him getting all pissy and childish. For twenty, that is not very promising. He's roughly twenty according to estimates. Twenty year old guys like him are to be avoided. Barring some sort of intervention, they generally don't develop well. Twenty is not a child. Usually you are pretty set in your ways - attitudes and beliefs are relatively stable at that point. Barring intervention or being insightful enough to want to change,you will continue along the path you are on. I know. I have seen it.
Now switching from him to Zevran, I see Zevran as someone who is far more mature. He doesn't want pity or smartass remarks. He is pretty straight forward. Yes, he is oversexed but that is his thing. He's basically a mature person who accepts what life gives him and makes the best of it. I admire that. He had a crappy upbringing too. Not any better than Alistair's. And he does zero whining. He doesn't have a naive or romantic view of the world. He's very pragmatic but can be reasoned with. He's intelligent. He's capable of being a good friend to you. He's not immature. He's very mature. He just likes to joke about sex but that is his character's way of keeping emotionally distant due to his being an assassin.
Comparing the two, if I had to pick between the two, I would pick Zev hands down in real life. Alistair would not even stand a chance. He's to busy with self pity and lacks initiative. He's not mature. He puts you in charge then gets mad at your decisions. Blaming you but not willing to take charge.... for a game, the romance is cute enough. It's better and even the IRS scenes are better than the zev one which is why I tend to go with alistair, but it is precisely because of my knowledge that I know enough to stay away from someone like Alistair in real life. And if he doesn't get his way, you see how he is in DA2 - a drunken mess. If you don't murder someone he wanted revenge on and don't put him on the throne (which he should never be on the throne) he may very well become a drunk. That is another red flag. There are many red flags. Now I don't know how much you or most people here understand people in general or even how old most of you are, but I've known people like him. I've worked with them and dated them. They are the people you AVOID having in your personal life if you want a healthy and mature relationship. Zevran however, strangely enough exhibits basically NO red flags. He's a keeper. The sex might be a red flag if you are prone to find that an issue, but he has his reasons for being that way and yet he will fall in love and be devoted to you entirely. So it is not emotional damage that causes him to behave that way. It's a lifestyle he actively chooses until he finds the right person whereby he evolves.
The fact that Alistair is barely out of his teens really isn't a huge excuse. I've known very mature teens and very immature teens. Some of this is due to his being sheltered, but his extreme behavior if you don't kill loghain is a red flag. So many people defend him for it, but it shows IMO that this is not really a person that is good a coping with life when he doesn't get what he wants. I actually know someone very much like him right now. He's a raging drunk with a not very ideal upbringing. He's verbally abusive. He's nothing more than an overgrown child. He's a nightmare. A drunken, abusive nightmare who at twenty his life was similar to Alistair's in certain ways. He takes fits when he doesn't get his way. He's nothing more than a big child who pulls tantrums and what you see with alistair is exactly that. Him pulling a tantrum when he doesn't get his way. This behavior will likely not be limited to this one situation though this situation is extreme. We see what happens when things don't work out for him and he's not on the throne. He becomes a drunk. So really, he is very unstable. You have to give him what he wants or harden him and stick him on the throne to get a decent outcome from him. And yet, why would I want him on the throne if I am not his wife who is going to be calling the shots given all I know about him?
He's charming enough and yes the romance is nice, but a person like him in real life would not be fun to be with. Certainly not in the long term. This game sort of makes it hard to see that, but his personality is 'feel sorry for me'. He jokes about it but it's a full on pity party. Ever meet people like that? Or someone who becomes abnormally attached to someone because they are that desperate for attention and love? They are unstable and if you ever meet someone like that in real life you should RUN as fast as you can in the other direction. Or at least don't date them...
Also, your desire to drop kick him is because he is a child but he is NOT a child. He's not behaving like an adult and yet, he is twenty and he is in a very adult situation where he needs to behave like an adult and think of the greater good as he did all through the game. That's the thing. You rationalize it but really, for a twenty year old to behave like that is a big red flag. Sure, he's not as mature as a 30 year old, but he's still not doing very well for 20 and it has to due with his world view... his pity me attitude, the whole feeling sorry for himself, the whining and needing to get his way. It's all baggage and it shows up all over the place at the landsmeet that he is a big old victim who better get his way or else. Your instincts are right on him. He should be drop kicked. You are about to murder someone quite likely because a immature man wants it and cannot see that sparing his life might actually help stop a blight that can end the world. Yes. End the world! He would choose risking the world over his desire for revenge. That is a HUGE red flag. Sorry, he is damaged. He should never be king. He should not get his way for the sake of getting his way, and honestly, he feels it's a betrayal because it's all about him and his pity party. He is too immature to comprehend that YOU NEED GREY WARDENS and if you can get one more it's a much better shot. Instead, he will throw a fit and leave in the middle of a blight. Who does that? A person who is very immature... too immature to see the big picture. That is not someone you ever really want in your life. I overlook it for the sake of the game but in real life? He wouldn't stand a chance. I don't waste my time with immature men. I've seen how they are. I am worthy of better.
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