164 réponses à ce sujet

[Lobos1988]

I really do not care if it is something like "my husband and I..." or huggung and kissing your boyfriend... totally ok with me... I am not homophobic and if you are gay, you are gay...

 

The thing bothering me are people that have to tell everyone "i am gay" when they introduce themselves... and (some people might call me homophobic) things like gay pride parades.

 

I am not doing hetero pride parades. Which from my point of view would pretty much be the same as gay pride parades... it's just shoving your sexuality into peoples faces.

 

One of my oldest and dearest friends is gay. You would not notice it if he would not tell you he is... and even if you would notice it he would not make a big deal out of it. I have NO problem at all with him and his boyfriend making out when we are in public or at a party... this is how normal sexuality works.

 

I really just have an itch with people that think they have to shove it in everyones faces by purpose... as in "Hey, I'm Mike, I'm gay".

 

Being friends with him I visited a lot of joints that are known to be homosexual places where you go to meet other guys (or girls) that are into the same thing...

 

I have experienced a lot of people that are totally cool about their sexuality and were fun to talk about... sometimes I had to tell them that I am not interested but I could go on taling to them having a nice time.

 

I have on the other side also experiences people that introduced themselves as gay from the beginning (not necessarily at those joints) and after I told them that I am a hetero guy and meant no offense they were walking around telling everyone that I was homophobic and an ******* for not being gay.

 

Imagine a hetero person going around doing the same thing... for example me walking wround in a club telling everyone to stay away from thet guy because he is gay and an *******...

 

suddenly I am homophobic...

 

Thing is that you can also be heterophobic and that is something okay in this society...

 

Let's just all keep stuff about sex in our bedrooms, not care about who others date and kiss in public and live our freaking lives without discriminating each other (which goes BOTH ways).

[Lobos1988]

For the record: it IS that simple... people just don't WANT it that simple

[KainD]

I am not doing hetero pride parades. Which from my point of view would pretty much be the same as gay pride parades... it's just shoving your sexuality into peoples faces.

 

I just told you why they do that. It will only stop when being gay will be as natural to the majority as hetero is. 

[Lobos1988]

I just told you why they do that. It will only stop when being gay will be as natural to the majority as hetero is. 

 

To be honest: I think it would be more ok for everyone if you would not try so hard. I know a lot of people that are ok with homosexuality but think the same way I do about those parades...

 

We might have different opinions on this, and I come from a country where gay marriage is ok... but still they are doing those here.

 

If this shoving your sexuality in other peoples faces stops I honestly think the acceptance of homosexuality in our society would even get better faster.

[Ianamus]

I understand and relate to the desire to have homosexuality and bisexuality considered just as natural as heterosexuality, but throwing giant parades for it seems to do the complete opposite, if I'm honest. I have to admit that as much as I believe in LGBT rights I have never really understood what a gay pride parade is supposed to achieve.

[KainD]

To be honest: I think it would be more ok for everyone if you would not try so hard. I know a lot of people that are ok with homosexuality but think the same way I do about those parades...

 

We might have different opinions on this, and I come from a country where gay marriage is ok... but still they are doing those here.

 

If this shoving your sexuality in other peoples faces stops I honestly think the acceptance of homosexuality in our society would even get better faster.

 

No, nothing gets better if you don't act aggressively. Slavery doesn't stop until violent revolts, politics don't change significantly without aggressive movements. If all gay people were quiet about their sexuality gay marriage wouldn't be allowed anywhere until this day. 

[KaiserShep]

It's ironic how a parade is shoving sexuality in people's faces, yet the media in general is highly sexualized. I mean, did I fall through some rift into bizarro land where everyone is a frakkin' Quaker?

[daveliam]

I understand and relate to the desire to have homosexuality and bisexuality considered just as natural as heterosexuality, but throwing giant parades for it seems to do the complete opposite, if I'm honest. I have to admit that as much as I believe in LGBT rights I have never really understood what a gay pride parade is supposed to achieve.

 

It's a celebration of a culture.  There is a "gay culture" and pride parades are just an example of a celebration between members of the culture and supporters of LGBT's.  It's really no different than a Puerto Rican Pride Day or an Irish-Pride (which is really what St. Patty's Day Parades are, effectively) Parade.  It's a group of people coming together to celebrate and have a good time.

 

I go to the Pride Parade in NYC every year and, frankly, to me, it's got nothing to do with anyone but me, my husband, and our friends.  I'm not there to make a statement (although I have marched with several groups in the past) and I'm not there to "push my sexuality".  I'm there because this is a place where we can go and enjoy ourselves.  If you don't like them, don't go to them.  You're not really the target audience if you aren't LGBT or an ally, to be honest.

[Mihura]

I am not doing hetero pride parades. Which from my point of view would pretty much be the same as gay pride parades... it's just shoving your sexuality into peoples faces.

 

Yes you are and it is call Carnaval in my country, parades about sex with fanservice are really old.

[Lobos1988]

It's ironic how a parade is shoving sexuality in people's faces, yet the media in general is highly sexualized. I mean, did I fall through some rift into bizarro land where everyone is a frakkin' Quaker?

 

The media is getting more and more sexual agressive... but also in homosexual ways...

 

I can tell you exactly how those parades shove it in peoples faces. There is few people that really mind two guys kissing and hugging in public (even less girls, but that is due to different resaons).... what people don't like is thousands of skimpy clothed people (some almost naked) kissing and making out (and if it was only that) in public.

 

There is actually no difference in how people would react if it was thousands of hetero people doing crazy heterosexual stuff in public. It is just wrong and does not help the case.

 

Period. No matter what sexual orientation you have, this is the wrong way to fight for it.

 

As for the culture argument;

 

Same goes here. You can celebrate a culture without public sex...

 

See... that is where averyone goes like "whats wrong with you, do you tell gay people that gay sex is not ok?"...

 

NO!
 

Displaying your sexuality in public (apart from the normal stuff couples do in public) NO MATTER WHAT GENDER YOU ARE IN is something people don't want to have shoved in their faces.

 

As for the recent carneval comment:

 

There is no sexuality shoved in someones face. They dance. Men, Women, transsexuals. No Message implied as gay pride parades do.

[KaiserShep]

I've been to gay pride parades. I never felt like anything was really being shoved into my face, and I don't recall any actual public sex. Frankly, this is a load of bullsh*t.

[Mihura]

As for the recent carneval comment:

 

There is no sexuality shoved in someones face. They dance. Men, Women, transsexuals. No Message implied as gay pride parades do.

 

What? Do you ever been to one of the Canarval parties? They use skimpy outfits and make out a lot. There is nothing prude about that. Some dances are even really sexual in nature. 

[Lobos1988]

And the last two pages illustrate the problem very well.

 

I am a sexually very open minded person that tells no one what to do in their bedroom, and thinks that everyone can do what they want in there.

 

I just do not need to know.

 

And yet my argumentation is called bullshit as seen above. Without counter arguments apart from personal experience. Where I can hold against: I have been to such a parade myself and saw live sex of two homosexuals. Which is kinda shoving it into my face... and everyone was cheering... so well... yeah...

 

I appeled to get along and be nice no matter what you are into and get picked on...

[Lobos1988]

What? Do you ever been to one of the Canarval parties? They use skimpy outfits and make out a lot. There is nothing prude about that. Some dances are even really sexual in nature. 

 

I have seen them on TV... there IS a lot of sex involved... but not necessarily hetero only.

[Ianamus]

It's a celebration of a culture.  There is a "gay culture" and pride parades are just an example of a celebration between members of the culture and supporters of LGBT's.  It's really no different than a Puerto Rican Pride Day or an Irish-Pride (which is really what St. Patty's Day Parades are, effectively) Parade.  It's a group of people coming together to celebrate and have a good time.

 

I go to the Pride Parade in NYC every year and, frankly, to me, it's got nothing to do with anyone but me, my husband, and our friends.  I'm not there to make a statement (although I have marched with several groups in the past) and I'm not there to "push my sexuality".  I'm there because this is a place where we can go and enjoy ourselves.  If you don't like them, don't go to them.  You're not really the target audience if you aren't LGBT or an ally, to be honest.

 

I see. Do you think that it's possible that having a separate "gay culture" is in some ways a negative thing because it creates a division between gay/bisexual people and heterosexual people?

 

Please note that I have nothing against the idea of "gay culture", or against gay pride parades. I just don't really know what to make of them.

[Mihura]

I have seen them on TV... there IS a lot of sex involved... but not necessarily hetero only.

 

Wait... so are you ok with that than?

[daveliam]

There is actually no difference in how people would react if it was thousands of hetero people doing crazy heterosexual stuff in public. It is just wrong and does not help the case.

 

 

So, like, Spring Break?  Or St. Patty's?  Or New Year's Eve?  I see tons of "crazy heterosexual" stuff every time I go to a bar, but I'm not complaining about it.

 

As for the culture argument;

 

Same goes here. You can celebrate a culture without public sex...

 

See... that is where averyone goes like "whats wrong with you, do you tell gay people that gay sex is not ok?"...

 

NO!
 

 

Have you ever been to a pride parade?  Or are you just reporting what you've seen on the news or the internet?  Because if you have actually been to one, you would know that about 3/4 of the marchers in the parades are politicians and companies that are supporting the LGBT community.  And they are all dressed fully (usually in t-shirts with slogans on them).  And NONE of them are having public sex. 

 

Are there scantily clad men and women there too?  Yes, there are.  But they are the minority (although an enjoyable minority, to be honest).  And THEY aren't having public sex either.  You seem to be speaking in broad generalizations and I'm not seeing much practical experience influencing your statements.

 

Displaying your sexuality in public (apart from the normal stuff couples do in public) NO MATTER WHAT GENDER YOU ARE IN is something people don't want to have shoved in their faces.

 

Questionable statement about "normal stuff couples do" aside, why is Pride being shoved in your face?  Are you there?  If so, then you probably know what's up?  If you are just driving past, who cares?  If you aren't there, how is it being shoved in your face?

 

As for the recent carneval comment:

 

There is no sexuality shoved in someones face. They dance. Men, Women, transsexuals. No Message implied as gay pride parades do.

 

This is exactly what the scantily clad people at Pride do too.  So what is the difference again?

[bandcandy]

Nobody cares that you don't care about what people do in their bedrooms and that somehow you're the real victim in all this. That sounds like a personal problem. One that I would suggest you address in a proper forum instead of hijacking what was once a good thread and you have now ensured it's end by lockdown. 

[Lobos1988]

Wait... so are you ok with that than?

 

No. I am no fan of public display of sex. There are things that belong in a bedroom... or somewhere you will not be seen by so many people (maybe getting caught... but... meh... that's something different).

 

Also as said above: Yes: dividing a gay culture from a hetero culture just makes more of a divide ^^

[Neon Rising Winter]

Gay pride marches - I always thought 'We're here, we're queer, we're going to drink some beer' summed them up nicely. It's a demonstration that gay people exist, are gay, and are fairly normal - or at least as normal as any parade of people ever is!

 

I don't know how much perspective you've got on this, but I promise you over the last 25 years the changes have been incredible. But equally, if I were to act in public the way I see heterosexual people acting on a daily basis I'd still experience a ton of abuse. And while that attitude still persists on the scale it does, I'm not ready to hang up my marching boots.

 

And to be honest, once that attitude ceases to exist, the marches will continue as a cultural thing. The difference is no one will care.

[daveliam]

I see. Do you think that it's possible that having a separate "gay culture" is in some ways a negative thing because it creates a division between gay people and heterosexual people?

 

Please note that I have nothing against the idea of "gay culture", or against gay pride parades. I just have conflicting feelings about them.

 

Not at all.  Certainly not any more than having an Italian American or Irish American or Puerto Rican American culture does (I'm American, if you can't tell, so I'm just using that as my frame; I'm sure there are other cultural examples too).  Celebrating one culture shouldn't create a division between that culture and others unless it becomes exclusionary.  If others aren't welcomed, then yeah, it's divisive.  It's everyone is welcome to enjoy that culture, then no, I don't see it as divisive.

[KaiserShep]

It's not like people are screwing in the streets lol.

[Mihura]

No. I am no fan of public display of sex. There are things that belong in a bedroom... or somewhere you will not be seen by so many people (maybe getting caught... but... meh... that's something different).

 

Also as said above: Yes: dividing a gay culture from a hetero culture just makes more of a divide ^^

 

But public sex happens even outside of big parties, that being hetero, gay, bi whatever. So in the end you are against public sex period.

 

Just do not say against gay parades because that sounds homophobic, parades and parties happen everywhere but public sex is not exclusive to any of this events, so your argument of cause and consequence is invalid in this case. 

[Mes]

Some of you guys are getting a little riled up. Shhhh, be calm.

 

Just want to throw in my 2 cents regarding gay pride parades (and I really hope this thread doesn't get locked, these are really great discussions that have stemmed from the original topic). 

 

I haven't been to one in recent memory, but I've heard stories at let me tell you, yes some people do hold views that SOME gay pride parades can be over the top and possibly misrepresenting the gay community. I've had gay people that I personally know express their annoyance and disappointment with what they'd seen.

 

My point is that that's not a horribly uncommon view, and it can be shared by some people from the gay community. And it presents a great opportunity for a thorough discussion.

[Lobos1988]

So, like, Spring Break?  Or St. Patty's?  Or New Year's Eve?  I see tons of "crazy heterosexual" stuff every time I go to a bar, but I'm not complaining about it.

 

 

Have you ever been to a pride parade?  Or are you just reporting what you've seen on the news or the internet?  Because if you have actually been to one, you would know that about 3/4 of the marchers in the parades are politicians and companies that are supporting the LGBT community.  And they are all dressed fully (usually in t-shirts with slogans on them).  And NONE of them are having public sex. 

 

Are there scantily clad men and women there too?  Yes, there are.  But they are the minority (although an enjoyable minority, to be honest).  And THEY aren't having public sex either.  You seem to be speaking in broad generalizations and I'm not seeing much practical experience influencing your statements.

 

 

Questionable statement about "normal stuff couples do" aside, why is Pride being shoved in your face?  Are you there?  If so, then you probably know what's up?  If you are just driving past, who cares?  If you aren't there, how is it being shoved in your face?

 

 

This is exactly what the scantily clad people at Pride do too.  So what is the difference

 

Wow... totally missunderstanding me. Well done and read.

 

@bandcandy: as far as I have seen, the thread went into that direction before. Stop blaming me. Really?