Alright, how about this.
I'm playing the game and I've gotten to the point of approval or whatever where one of the characters is interested in me and asks if there's a relationship developing and this is the point where I turn them down or start the romance in earnest, if I want to turn them down, do I, the player, get the option of citing race as a reason? Do I, hypothetically speaking, get the option to tell Cassandra "Sorry, I'm not into other humans. I'm only into elves." ?
Because if I do, and I'm able to reject any advances made by npc's based on race just like they get to reject me on that same criteria, then I will drop all my complaints.
That depends entirely on whether or not companions will ever initiate flirtatious dialogue with you, though. I think they said that after Anders they would be avoiding it, so I'd imagine that most dialogue that leads to romances would have to be initiated by the player.
Though after hearing that iron Bull likes to sleep around I could see him propositioning to the player, and I'm fairly sure his race would be available for grounds of rejection. Same for Qunari PC's and human/elven LI's.