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[Grieving Natashina]

This sums up my latest Shep in a nutshell:

 

Spoiler

[Grieving Natashina]

Kenneth: Gabby, you'd say that the Normandy is a she, not a he, right? 

 

Gabriella: Of course, the Normandy is the sweetest girl there is.

 

Kenneth: And EDI's a she, Tali's definitely a she... 

 

Gabriella: What are you getting at, Kenneth? 

 

Kenneth: I'm just saying I'm feeling a wee bit threatened here, a lot of female energy, and I'm just one man. 

 

Gabriella: You're such a d*ck. 

 

Kenneth: See? Look where your mind went. I've got to watch out for myself.

[BurningBlood]

Not sure this fits entirely with the spirit of the thread, but:

 

"I'm alive!" - Vorcha classes in multiplayer, after being revived.  I love how they sound slightly surprised.

[Han Shot First]

Vega and Cortez' banter is always great. The cargo bay of ME3's SR2 is probably my favorite spot because of them. That, and that's where all my guns are. There's also another kind of vibe I get from that location of the ship. It kind of reminds me of the amusing scenes with the colonial marines on the Sulaco. I can see Vega saying he's state of the badass art.

 

That was my probably my favorite area of the ship as well, and for the same reason. 

[Grieving Natashina]

Not sure this fits entirely with the spirit of the thread, but:

 

"I'm alive!" - Vorcha classes in multiplayer, after being revived.  I love how they sound slightly surprised.

My favorite vorcha line:

 

"Prothean no like you!"

 

It helps that I got to see Mark Meer do that line at a panel at Denver Comic Con this year.  

[Han Shot First]

“What is it with you and rescuing scientists from dig sites that have been overrun by hostile forces? If you decide to help her take down the Shadow Broker, I’m going to be jealous…and somewhat concerned.”

[Grieving Natashina]

I can relate to Jack here.  I feel like this whenever I'm around my elementary school aged nephews.  They're like parrots and I have to really watch what I say:

 

Jack: Screw you, f—flight lieutenant. 

Joker: Uhh, what the hell was that?

[SporkFu]

James: I just gotta say... swords? Seriously?

Javik: Fear not the weapon but the one who wields it.

James: That's what I love about you, buggy. You're like Sun Tzu with more eyes.

Is that on Sanctuary, or the coup attempt?

[SporkFu]

Coup.

That's awesome. Never took Vega and Javik on the mission; one or the other but not both.

[themikefest]

Ashley: Young men have funny ideas of what asari are like. I blame the extranet. And computer games.

[CmdrSpaceCowboy]

Overheard by salarian on sur kesh...
"If I wanted you opinion I would promote you. In the mean time stay sharp and shut up"

[Neverwinter_Knight77]

"So, how were those noodles?"
"A little spicy."
"I love you, Grunt."
"Heh, heh, heh..."

Citadel is comedy gold.

[Grieving Natashina]

Garrus rocks.

 

[Han Shot First]

"Sharpen your knife, Commander. His is a voice that must be silenced--and a throat that must be slit."

 

---Javik

[KaiserShep]

James: I just gotta say... swords? Seriously?

Javik: Fear not the weapon but the one who wields it.

James: That's what I love about you, buggy. You're like Sun Tzu with more eyes.

 

I have to say, it's hard to determine which part of this I love more, the fact that James basically calls Javik Sun Tzu, or the fact that the game is actually referencing the ridiculousness of swords.

[SporkFu]

Blasto 6: Partners In Crime:

Spoiler

 

Chief: psssssk Dammit, Blasto! I told you to bring in those Vorcha alive for questioning. 

Blasto: This one didn't have anything to ask them.

Chief: *Psssssk* You blew up half a level of Zakera Ward! 

Blasto: It was an aesthetically displeasing habitat anyway.

Chief: psssssk You don't get it, Kahje-clan! psssssk Ever since they found eezo on the Vorcha homeworld psssssk the Council's been trying to make nice. psssssk Bottom line psssssk you can't touch the vorcha. psssssk They've got diplomatic immunity. 

Blasto: Then this one will not attempt diplomacy.

Chief: psssssk You're also getting a new partner. 

Blasto: Are you engaging in reproductive behavior with this one? 

Chief: psssssk Unless you want your spectre status revoked psssssk you're working in a joint operation with Boobin from C-Sec. 

Blasto: An elcor? You know this one works alone. 

Chief: psssssk Look... I've had to talk them down from suspending you. psssssk I've gotten a pulmonary ulcer from dealing with this mess. psssssk I can't even eat solid food! 

Blasto: You would benefit from shedding excess body mass, chief. 

 

---------------

 

Blasto: Greetings, Boobin. This one understands that you are the second best law enforcement agent on the Citadel. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Funny, I heard the same thing about you. 

Blasto: Just avoid interfering with this one's projected maneuvering path. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Hold it, spectre. We do this by the book. 

Blasto: You may carry the book, while this one opens another excretion vent on the vorcha ambassador. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Dammit. You big stupid jellyfish. I'm just three solar days from retirement. 

Blasto: Obtain a firm grip on your reproductive anatomy. The vorcha ambassador's vehicle just turned down that skyway. 

Boobin: Badassfully: What the hell are you doing. This is my mate's car. We just paid it off. 

Blasto: Hopefully you are insured. 

 

---------------

 

Blasto: Greetings, vorcha citizen. Please explain the reason for your haste.

Vorcha: Graaargh! You no touch me! Diplomatic immun- *crunch* 

Blasto: Please exercise caution, criminal scum. Your face may cause damage to my partner's vehicle. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Hey. You're hurting him. 

Blasto: His unique genetic structure will enable him to regenerate... unless this one uses fire. 

Vorcha: Graargh! No talk! No talk! 

Blasto: This one has forgotten whether its pistol is currently equipped with incendiary ammunition. Does tyhe criminal scum consider itself fortunate? 

Boobin: Badassfully: You'd better talk. I can't hold him back.

Vorcha: Graaaaaargh! Consort! Guarding boss at consort! 

Blasto: Have a pleasant day. *crunch*

Boobin: Badassfully: Dammit. What the hell was that. You're out of control.

Blasto: You may wish to monitor your stress levels. High blood pressure is unhealthy for a species adapted to a high gravity environment. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Come on. I know someone at the consort's office. 

Blasto: This one suspected you had deviant mating fetishes. 

Boobin: Badassfully: You're paying for the car.

 

---------------

 

Sister: Coquettishly: Welcome to the consort's suites. Oh Boobin, it's great to see you. 

Blasto: Has a prothean descended from heaven? Because this one would enjoy enkindling that.

Boobin: Badassfully: Hey. Man. That's my sister. 

Blasto: your progenitor's propensity for attractiveness was passed only to her. 

Sister: Coquettishly: Who's the big handsome jellyfish, Boobin? 

Blasto: Blasto. This one is training Boobin in proper legal procedure.

Boobin: Badassfully: Listen. Honey. We need to get inside. 

Sister: Coquettishly: You're a pain, Boobin. But I can't resist your good-looking partner. 

Blasto: Thank you, polyp. This one will attempt to determine a way to repay you. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Seriously. Don't be like that with my sister. 

 

----------------

 

Blasto: Greetings, vorcha scum. This one mistook you for a krogan defecation. 

Vorcha: Grargh! You no talk. Me get your badge! 

Boobin: Badassfully: That badge is the only thing keeping him from killing you right now. 

Vorcha: Grargh! You'll be sorry! 

Blasto: This one is already sorry. It will take hours to remove your olfactory residue from my oxygen diffusion membrane. Let us depart, Boobin.

Boobin: Badassfully: What the hell did that accomplish.

Blasto: Two things. First, the vorcha knows we are following it. 

Boobin: Badassfully: And second.

Blasto: You have demonstrated that you still a supportive endoskeleton.

 

------------------

 

*sound of bedsprings creaking*

Sister: Coquettishly: That's right, baby. Tell me your soul name. 

Blasto: It is whatever you wish it to be, polyp. 

Boobin: Badassfully: What the hell is going on here. Are you sleeping with my sister. 

Blasto: Slumber would be difficult, due to the energetic nature of our copulation. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Dammit. Blasto. That's it. You and me. Outside. Right now. 

Sister: Coquettishly: Please don't hurt him.

Blasto: This one promises not to harm your brother. 

....

Boobin: Badassfully: I didn't ask to be partnered with you, Blasto. 

Blasto: No solid waste excrement. You dislike the manner in which this spectre operates. 

Boobin: Badassfully: No. you're one of the best damn cops I've worked with. 

Blasto: Then what is the difficulty, aside from your sister?

Boobin: Badassfully: The problem is that I can't work with a partner who doesn't respect me.

Blasto: This one greatly respects you, but you care more about protocol than stopping the vorcha. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Doing it by the book is what separates us from them.

Vorcha: Haa-Haaaaahh! Kill you now.

*shots fired* 

Blasto: Spawn of questionable parentage! The vorcha! Get to cover! 

 

-----------------

 

Boobin: Badassfully: Dammit. Blasto. They got me. They got me bad. 

Blasto: No Boobin, you are too aesthetically displeasing to die!

Boobin: Badassfully: Promise me... you'll get... the... vorcha...

Blasto: They have already perished, though they are currently unaware of it.

Boobin: Badassfully: No. By the book. Promise me you'll do it... by... the... book...

Blasto: this one cannot accede to this request.

Boobin: *gurgles* Ba-badassfully: Promise me. *gasps* Dammit. Promise- Translator error: Obstruction in airway.

Blasto: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

 

------------------

 

Vorcha: me give you money!

Sister: Coquettishly: You didn't say anything about attacking my brother. 

Vorcha: Brother? Graaaaaaaargh! Me no pay you! My men kill you instead! 

*breaking glass*

Blasto: Apologies, but your men had to catch a skycar. 

Vorcha: Blasto! How you find me? 

Blasto: By following Boobin's sister. It was obvious she helped your men plan the ambush. 

Vorcha: You no kill me! Diplomatic immunity!

Blasto: Yes. This one made a promise to do it by the book. You may only be killed in self-defense.

Vorcha: Graargh! You no see my gun! Ha! 

Blasto: You are standing on flammable material. This one has no choice... *ignites vorcha * ... but to enkindle this.

Sister: Coquettishly: What are you going to do with me.

Blasto: Nothing. The vorcha kidnapped you to lure me in. That is all this one saw. 

Sister: Coquettishly: You don't have to protect me. 

Blasto: No, but your brother needs blood from a family member to survive and indicted criminals cannot make tissue donations.

Sister: Coquettishly: What. Boobin's alive.

Blasto: Barely, and not for long, so cease talking and get to the hospital.

Sister: Coquettishly: Thank you, Blasto. Thank you for breaking the rules for me. 

Blasto: Polyp, when has this one ever been concerned with the rules?

 

--------------------

 

Blasto: You do not retire for another two solar days, Boobin. Please refrain from sleeping on the job.

Boobin: Badassfully: Ohh. What happened. 

Blasto: We got the vorcha. By the book. 

Chief: psssssk Blasto! psssssk The entire vorcha embassy burned down! psssssk Do you see how my suit is bulging?? psssssk It's because the turian is in here with me psssssk Up my cloaca! psssssk He's not happy!

Blasto: Nobody would be happy lodged in your cloaca, chief.

Chief: psssssk You're lucky Boobin's sister can testify you killed him in self-defense. psssssk Do you know how much paperwork you're going to have?

Blasto: My partner can take care of it. He is still restricted to desk duty for health reasons. 

Boobin: Badassfully: Blasto. you son of a-

[RMAM]

 

Kenneth: Gabby, you'd say that the Normandy is a she, not a he, right? 

 

Gabriella: Of course, the Normandy is the sweetest girl there is.

 

Kenneth: And EDI's a she, Tali's definitely a she... 

 

Gabriella: What are you getting at, Kenneth? 

 

Kenneth: I'm just saying I'm feeling a wee bit threatened here, a lot of female energy, and I'm just one man. 

 

Gabriella: You're such a d*ck. 

 

Kenneth: See? Look where your mind went. I've got to watch out for myself.

 

Was this in ME3? If so I missed it big time

[Valdrane78]

One of my favorite lines from the series isn't a line at all.  It's an entire scene.  When Liara comes up to your cabin with the message to future generations and asks you for your input, it's a very personal and touching moment in the trilogy.  Here I was, a 34 year old Marine Corps veteran who served in Kosovo and Afghanistan choking up at a scene from a video game.  It is, without a doubt, my favorite scene in the entire trilogy and expanded universe.

[Grieving Natashina]

Was this in ME3? If so I missed it big time

ME2.  Go to the engineering deck from time to time and listen to Ken and Gabby.  

 

Here's another one:

 

 

Gabby: I've got green across the board. The forward tanks are buoyant and elevated.

Ken: Are ya talking about the Normandy or Miranda?

Gabby: I'm talking about the one covered and protected, not bouncing in the breeze. 

Ken: I don't know. Operative Lawson's uniform is very official: it always makes me stand at attention.

[von uber]

"I'm the first human spectre; I'll get you two umbrellas. Spectre authority. "

[Grieving Natashina]

"I'm the first human spectre; I'll get you two umbrellas. Spectre authority. "

 

 

Another one I loved: "You used me as bait?!?  Hear that, the great Commander Shepard used the brittle-bones guy as bait."

[Han Shot First]

One of my favorite lines from the series isn't a line at all.  It's an entire scene.  When Liara comes up to your cabin with the message to future generations and asks you for your input, it's a very personal and touching moment in the trilogy.  Here I was, a 34 year old Marine Corps veteran who served in Kosovo and Afghanistan choking up at a scene from a video game.  It is, without a doubt, my favorite scene in the entire trilogy and expanded universe.

 

That was one of the best scenes in the entire trilogy, IMO.

[Elhanan]

These are as close as my faded memory can recall.

 

Shepard: "Good luck"

Grunt: "I don't need luck; I have ammo!"

 

Shepard" "Wrex."

Wrex: "Shepard."

 

Shepard: "This is stuff from my cabin! Oh; now this is personal!"

Shepard: "Messin' with my cabin!"

 

Garrus: "And this is the day when the Galaxy ran out of ammo!"