82 réponses à ce sujet

[Naughty Bear]

So I just recently had a reality check, I pictured where my progress is in life, future plans, what to do next etc but then I thought about my age.  I'm now 20 years old, soon to be 21 this year in summer, I'm no longer a teenager but a young man. I have a girlfriend who herself mentioned some serious business about the possible future, currently half-way through my degree and little work experience and the next 10 years from now will almost definitely be the most life changing decade ever for not just me but those in their early twenties now.

 

During the 20-30 bracket, its very common for people to get partners and eventually have a child and even get married, finish degree and start their first career properly that will fund their start of a new life, funding a home, living independently etc.

 

Not only just this, the people who are in my life now will probably be replaced by a new bunch of people, the past people will of gone on with their own lives or perhaps died.

 

Time is going very fast, I have no idea what the future is, I could even be performing my last moments before I die.

 

Commitments, responsibilities, family and independence. Doesn't anyone find this incredibly daunting and intimidating?

[luna1124]

Follow your heart... And use common sense.

[Nate Assassin]

Didn't expect that from the BSN.

[Eleinehmm]

Are you a university student ? What are you working on ?

 

As for  as good advices go: Do something:  Anything. It really helps, I had a rather ugly breakdown in my mid twenties (life has no purpose.. oh noooooo) and believe it or not, studying Abstract Algebra for no purpose whatsoever really helped me a lot.

People don’t really grow up, it’s a convenient thing to say, andI don’t think I am very different from the person I was 10 years ago. Just try to live and let live, and don't worry about getting a lot of things wrong.
 

[mybudgee]

LOLtwenty-somethings

[Il Divo]

Meh, my advice? Take it slow, don't make rash decisions. I'm 24 and getting ready to apply to grad school next year (completely single). Trust me, you don't want to jump into something you're not ready for, just to meet some standard of marriage + babies + career. 

[Eleinehmm]

LOLtwenty-somethings

 

While I do understand the sentiment, it's a bad way to phrase it.

[Fast Jimmy]

Ah... 20. That is truly an insane time of life. I know next to no one who is doing or living the life they envisioned at 30 they had at 20. Not that this is a bad thing - many of these aren't plans gone awry, but simply the things you can't even imagine about yourself and your future at that time.

In regards to your career, there is an entire world out there after college/university. Even if your degree is exactly the field you want to go into, going into the professional sector of any career is often illuminating in how different one would expect it to be. Even moreso if your degree isn't laser focused in its direct degree-to-job scope (take it from a Psych major who is working in a realm completely removed from Psychology). This is good, as experience is the greatest teacher and nothing can prepare you for the realities of any profession outside of going, doing and living it.

In terms of romance and partnership, this is also a tough time. Realize that anyone you love now will be a completely different person ten, fifteen, twenty years from now, just like you will be a different person. Getting married, having kids, settling into a job... these all affect your relationships with those closest to you, whether it is romantic, friendship or familial. The key to keeping any of these relationships strong is learning to change along with those you love and spend time with. If you learn to grow and develop together, then any challenges you come across can be handled. However, if you love the person as they exist today and can't let go of that if they change (or vice versa), that is the beginning of the end of any relationship. So the question you ask yourself is not "do I love them enough to last for the long term" but "can I love this person as they change, and can they love me as I do?"



But most of all, MOST OF ALL... don't worry so much. Your 20's are a great age that will form and define your role as an adult for the rest of your life. No mistake is too bad to never recover from, no success is so large as to pave your road for the rest of your life. Enjoy this time, as it will be equally the most complex and simple you will ever find your life, as paradoxal as that sounds.

[Nate Assassin]

BSN decribing life without e-peen and fite me's, is this really happening?

[Kaiser Arian XVII]

Go buy a farm or fishing boat. Do it as soon as possible. The only thing that is necessary is food.

 

End of line.

[Isichar]

Follow your heart... And use common sense.

This. It also doesn't hurt to bring a towel with you wherever you go in life.

[Kaiser Arian XVII]

Also you need in life:

A loyal wife

A badass watch dog

An obedient child

A large entertainment center (PC, Blue-Ray, Consoles, domestic mini-gym, etc.)

 

It's not an easy task!

[Chris]

I never found it daunting since it went pretty natural for me and i should say NEVER take it for granted that it will be a tough time because most of times when you think it's going to be hard, it actually went by very well when looking back.

 

One thing is certain though, you will have hard times and good times ofc but that applies to your whole life not just between 20-30, i actually found aging up to 20 a LOT tougher than 20+ and yes some people will go on with their lives and new will enter your life but good friends don't have to leave if they/you don't decide that they have too, i'm still friends with people i know from my childhood.

 

sry to put it this way but for f*cks sake don't think of death already, your life have just begun, 21 is nothing.

 

While responsibilites , work etc sounds daunting sometimes it opens up new possibilities and more freedom to do what you want and shape your life how you want which is very rewarding in itself so be excited and welcome the future,

[mybudgee]

FastJimmy has it right

[bmwcrazy]

LOLtwenty-somethings

 

This.

 

Most of my life since college has been a blur. Blame all the booze and other bad (read: awesome) decisions I guess.

 

Now I'm almost 30 and I'm still not married. I don't have any kids either and that's driving my parents crazy. Nevertheless I'll keep enjoying my life and not worry about it too much. I have everything I could ever ask for and I don't intend to change my lifestyle anytime soon.

 

/team_yolo

[Sion1138]

Que sera...

[Gravisanimi]

22 not married, working down the career path college-free, living with my girlfriend of several years, owning a house, and have almost died ..*pause as I remember*. 17 times, and don't plan to have kids.

 

But what is reality? And how can it pay me?

[ZombieOberyn]

My advice is work in a drug cartel somewhere in South America and do something interesting before you die a miserable death. Its the most realistic option. Or just off yourself, doesn't matter which really.

[TurianRebel212]

Dafuq... Prime of your life. 20 years old. Dafuq!?!?! quit worry so much and have fun. What the hell is up with my generation that takes themselves uber serious. 

 

My GAWD. I'm 28, at your age I was in the Kandahar Province dogging RPGS and AK's and trying not to get my head cut off by Haji. 

 

So please, bro. Chillax and have fun. 

 

 

Party. Get laid. Get smashed. Repeat. Party. Get laid. Get smashed. Repeat. 

[Nate Assassin]

Party. Get laid. Get smashed. Repeat. Party. Get laid. Get smashed. Repeat. 

 

10/10 would follow this forever.

[EarthboundNess]

Its funny, I just had one of these. A year off before uni and from the outside in, it looks like I've done **** all with it. I'd certainly tell a different story (course I would), life's done its absolute best to keep things weird and busy.

 

I'm not in your age group or even in a similar situation OP, but I'd recommend you do what I've very slowly learnt to adopt this year and just roll with the punches and enjoy all the good, bad and general weirdness of life as part of your own unique story that only you can tell. 

 

And as other people have already said about problems, there ain't no hole you can create that you can't just dig back out of again.

[Fishy]

Don't put too much pressure on your shoulder. Tomorow is a mystery and yesterday history. I am 34 and  it's not that bad.  Sure you get older and balder ( hair recess ftw)  Don't do ( I need get be married before X age). So many people are miserable  because of this.  My sister is already divorced and monoparental with two children.

 

 

In the end .. The universe does not give any ****. The world won't stop functionning. We're all different. If you're not ready or you hate it. Than don't. Follow your heart. You don't have to be miserable. You don't have to do what everyone is doing. Slacking is great.

 

FFS .. LIVE ******.

 

If you want to do it.. Than do it.

[Gravisanimi]

But if it helps: 45% of humanity was probably dead at that age 50 thousand years ago.

[ZombieOberyn]

Lucky bastards.