My tabletop gaming group consists of my fiance, his friend Sean, my friend Eileen, and my sister, who is currently living with me because she and her boyfriend are down on their luck. Fiance, Sean, and Eileen are longtime roleplayers across a variety of gaming systems, and they all play together beautifully. My sister is an active alcoholic and she's on the Autism spectrum and has Borderline Personality Disorder. We game once a week, but I see her every day.
My sister loved our first gaming session (but the other players did not). She looted every dead or disabled creature we came across (even when I blatantly pointed out that I was erasing items from another player's character sheet), insisted upon illogical bonuses to every roll, and randomly ran off from the main party, necessitating an extended interval where I had to GM for her individually. The entire time, she was continuously re-rolling her allegedly hopeless character because said character did not have any 4s.The other players have all known my sister for >20 years, so they know her quirks by now. They were patient, but irritated. They enjoyed the game and declared the new system a success, but each of them asked me to do something about my sister, because she was legitimately impacting their ability to roleplay. The drinking was a problem. Most of us don't drink while we game. If anything, we'd be more inclined to overdo the coffee or energy drinks. But my sister was tanked. And longtime friends are all aware of her mental issues. Under most circumstances, I would tell people to put on their big boy/girl pants and suck it up because they don't know what she faces every day, but when three very well grounded people tell you that they're seriously considering lynching another player character, you tend to take notice. And there is a difference between compassion and enabling.
Last week, I decided to put on my big girl pants and stop pandering to my sister. Oh. My. God. It was disastrous. For one thing, I was also forbidding alcohol at the gaming table, which pretty much guaranteed at least one unhappy camper. For another, I didn't allow my sister to hog the spotlight. I've been hearing about it ever since. Every night. For at least an hour. As soon as I walk in the door.
So, yeah, obviously I can't keep pandering to my sister or I'll alienate everyone else, but she is my sister, and her emotional issues guarantee that she will take everything personally. Of course, I'm playing favorites. Of course, I'm being unfair. Of course, I'm deliberately shutting her out of the game due to some kind of warped personal vendetta. And that assumes that she's sober at the moment. If she isn't, she'll sit in a corner and sob loudly and incoherrently for hours.
Anybody got any thoughts, because at the moment, fratricide sounds like my best option. (I'm not serious.) In perfect seriousness, I should probably check out Al-Anon. Except that I'm agnostic, which is apparently not allowed. (sigh)