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[Undead Han]

Zaeed on Grunt's recruitment mission, in response to Jedore's radio broadcasts:

 

"Someone shut that b1tch up!"

 

The delivery is priceless.

[Jukaga]

 

When the Collectors took over the Normandy, a very clueless Miranda was feeling "touchy-feely"....

I had never seen those before. I'm in pain from laughing so much.

[Undead Han]

[Dale]

Just before encountering Thane:

 

Nassana:   You're supposed to be dead!

Shep:  I got better

[Dale]

Two of my favorite characters in the series (besides the Normandy crew) are:

 

·         Bailey

·         Matriarch Aethyta (Liara’s dad)

 

For some reason I just LOVE this character.   Wish I could recruit her.   At Illium, Shep goes to the bar for some drinks to meet & dialogue with her.   Later in ME3 (Apollo’s Café) you discover other “things” about her.    In her ME2 dialogue, Shep gets “suspicious” and asks why a Matriarch is serving drinks in the bar.   One of her responses is:

 

“When I started talking [to asari leadership] about making new mass relays ourselves, they laughed the blue right off my ass.  So now I serve drinks”.

 

I've seen some GREEN asari (ME3).   I wonder how that line would go with green.

 

 

.=======================================================================================

 

Captain Enyala: [to Miranda] I was just waiting for you to finish getting dressed. Or does Cerberus really let you wwhhoorree around in that outfit? 

 

Now that wasn't a very nice thing to say to my gorgeous voluptuous vixen with sprayed on pants!   Think maybe there’s some JEALOUSY there?  

 

Hummm…  I wonder what Aria would look like in Miranda’s outfit….especially in ME3’s DLC to retake Omega. 

[SNascimento]

The only problem with ME2 is that it has too little Javik. 

[a_mouse]

After dozens of playthroughs I've heard the jokes so many times I now skip most of them.  However, there is one character who's lines have stood the test of time for me upon repeated listenings:  the Batarian preacher on Omega.  For some reason I tag his dialogue trigger every time I pass him.  I just can't stop myself.  Personal favorites:

 

"REPENT!  The end is NIGH."

 

"HUMANS - are a blight on galactic purity.  YOU sir, you are a BLIGHT.  And you, and YOU, human. And YOU".    

 

"The Protheans cast off the lesser races: the krogan, the vorcha, and the HUMANS."

 

"And so they dwelled in filth, on worlds made of DIRT."

 

"Let none in my sight continue to live, lest their impurity displease me. The word is clear on this!"

[Darius M.]

1. Taking Garrus with you into the plague zone. 

"A quarantine zone for a plague that kills Turians... Why don't we ever go anywhere nice?"

"Is it hot in here, or is it just... ooooohhh that's not good."

 

 

2. When Thane comes aboard and Jacob gives that attitude. 

"That is if you're comfortable having an assassin watch your back..." 

"I don't like mercenaries. An assassin is just a precise mercenary."

 

So says the ex-Alliance deserter who now finds shady employment with a known terrorist organization that has absolutely zero oversight other than the tyrannical whims of a human centric, middle-aged man. I always start laughing. Really, Jacob? YOU are going to tell me who I should and shouldn't trust? Hypocrite much?

[Stronglav]

Geth do not infiltrate.

 

 

Killer hilarious scene.

 

[gottaloveme]

Sorry I haven't read them all but

 

Joker - the alliance has bridges and the asari have cockpits - wait ...no they don't

 

Best ever tho' is Mordin singing Gilbert and Sullivan