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[A.Kazama]

Figured I could go heavy:

Blackwall: I hear you've travelled the deep roads many a time Varric.

Varric: you've heard correctly warden. Usually not by choice however.

Blackwall: I also hear that you're quite dark spawn vanquisher if we had another blight I'd consider recruiting you into the grey wardens.

Varric: kind offer warden, but if there was another blight I'd mostly likely decline it. I've seen what the blight does to you all, you're buddy larius gave me a little insight to that... Nope sticking to the ramparts and living a good healthy life with bianca over here is good enough for me.

Blackwall: It's a shame you see things that way Varric. The wardens are more than just their sacrifice you know.

Varric: Believe me warden when I say my friends have sacrificed enough to your cause...

[A.Kazama]

Solas: Circle mages have an unnatural fear of "spirits" and "demons". I was wondering if the same could be said for you?

Vivienne: Fear is a choice I reserve unto myself... But I believe the correct term you are looking for is wariness on both sides.

Solas: So because of you're so-called wariness you and other circle mages refuse to learn from the world and it's creations.

Dorian: If I could just interject here, I'd like to point out that she doesn't speak for all mages... *cough*

Vivienne: Be silent magister, if not for the atrocities commited by your kin, the world would not be as it is!

Dorian: Yeesh! Bare your claws some more... And just so you know I was never a-

Solas: Woman, if not for *your* peoples fear and wariness of magic, the world might be in a very different predicament today!

Vivienne: enough! I will hear you no more...

Solas: ignoring the truth will not make the problem go away.

Inquisitor: *sigh* remind me never to take the three of you out together at any one time...

Dorian: I second that notion.

[Basement Cat]

Team 'Last Nerve' out on the field

 

Sera: So, you say she is a 'Seeker'?

 

Varric: That's right.

 

Sera: What's she seek, exactly?

 

Varric: The truth, as it were.

 

Sera: She came to you for that?! Not the smartest move, no offense.

 

Varric: None taken. You see, she has to seek the truth. Finding it is not part of her job description.

 

Sera: Ah, that makes sense then.

 

Cassandra: *sigh* I can hear you, you know.

 

Sera: I certainly hope so. We're right behind you. 

 

Inquisitor: Instead of finding ways to irritate Cassandra, you should think of how we'll kill that gigantic demon back there. *points*

 

*Sera and Varric turn around, weapons at the ready, but see nothing there*

 

Inquisitor: Made you look!

 

Cassandra: *smirk*

[TheLittleBird]

I've actually been writing quite a lot of party banter today, here's one of the conversations:

Sera: Blackwall, have I ever asked you about your rank in the Order?

Blackwall: I don't recall you doing so, but if you must know, I was a Constable.

Sera: What does that mean, exactly?

Blackwall: Well, a Warden-Constable is second-in-command to the Warden-Commander, and usually acts as the field commander.

Sera: And how was that, being a field commander?

Blackwall: In truth, it wasn't easy. Not for my physical, nor for my mental health. I've seen a lot of good, even young people die.

Sera: I... I'm sorry to hear that. Forgive me for bringing this up.

Blackwall: Oh, no need to apologize. It's okay. In death, we find sacrifice, to ensure the safety of others. Such is the duty of a Warden.

Sera: I sense a lot of pride in what the Order stands for, Blackwall.

Blackwall: And you're not wrong. Our cause is just.

[Freedheart]

Cassandra enters the war room at the Stronghold - it is utterly thrashed.  Sera, Dorian and Vivienne are collapsed in a pile.  Cole standing off by himself in the corner, Solas stark naked, asleep under the table, which is covered with empty jugs, some of which have spilled their contents, staining the mahogany.   Iron Bull and Varric, obviously inebriated, are laughing uproariously.

 

Cass: (Angry) What in the Maker's name has happened here!

Cole: Eep! (Disappears)

IB: (Surveying the room - arrows in the ceiling, Vivienne's favorite hat hanging from the chandelier, the Inquisitor with only one eyebrow) Well, to make a long story short -

Varric: (Gives an anguished cry) Why? Why would you do that?

IB: Do what?

V: Make a long story short.  The details, the whys and wherefores, the prologue, climax, and epilogue - these are the very things that make a story great.  Details, man, details!

IB: Well, see what happened was...

Cass: (Sighs, resigned) If I had all day, I would've asked you, Varric.  Please, just...ugh...clean this mess up, you two. (Stomps away muttering) Children...I work with children...

V: Works every time...threaten her with a story, she runs.  (Chuckling) Saved us an ass-chewing, you owe me, Horns.

IB: (Claps Varric on the back) I think this calls for a drink!

[Basement Cat]

Team 'Last Nerve' during a break, having lunch.

 

Sera: Ugh, that jerky's tougher than boot leather!

 

Varric: The flavor is better though.

 

Cassandra: How would you... no never mind.

 

Varric: Hey, beggars can't be choosers. That one time in the Deep Roads, we ran out of food and we had to eat our boots.

 

Cassandra: Bullshit!

 

Sera: Nah, it's not that bad.

 

Cassandra: That's not what I meant!

 

Varric: Well, you certainly don't have a problem chewing that stuff, Seeker. Must be from all that teeth gnashing you do.

 

Cassandra: I do not gnash my teeth. *turns to Inquisitor*

 

Inquisitor: *chewing on jerky* 'I'm shtaying outta thish.'

[cjones91]

Got another one(I have literally dozens of banter written up.)

After a long night of drinking Sera,IB,and Ena wake up to find that they wrecked the dining hall.

 

Sera:"So....how are we gonna explain this one?"

 

Ena:"No clue,have you got any ideas Iron Bull?"

 

IB:"I'm glad you asked because I have just the perfect cover story.If anyone wants to know why the dining hall is a disaster we blame it on a training exercise gain horribly wrong."

 

Ena:"Works for me."

 

A hour later....

 

Cassandra:"What happened here?"

 

Ena:"Nothing....."

 

Cassandra:This does'nt look like "nothing"!The entire dining hall looks like a dragon came through here!"

 

Ena:"That is because there were some troops who had a very rough night of training,they may have broken things in their wake."

 

Cassandra:"Hmm....I shall find these soilders at once and put them on clean up duty."(Cass leaves the dining hall along with Ena who went back to her quarters.

 

Two hours later.....

 

Sera:"It worked!Iron Bull might be a bigger bull shitter than Varric."

 

IB:(Laughs)You flatter me, but we all know Varric is a master at stringing together wild stories that have no truth to them."

 

(Varric overhears the conversation while cleaning Bianca):I" heard that.....my stories always have elements that are true."

 

Ena:"Like the story of how Hawke was a mage with undeniable wit who went around solving every little problem in Kirkwall?"

 

Varric"Yep,she even took time out of her schedule of killing hundreds of bandits,slavers,demons,the undead,raiders,blood mages,templars,hostile wild life and dragons to find things people had lost.Of course the pay was beyond awful though."

 

Sera:"Wow....sounds like she had a ton of time on her hands."

 

Varric:Not really,atleast we got to see wyverns and defeat a ancient Darkspawn magister."

 

IB:"See?Varric is the biggest bullshitter in Thedas.

 

Varric:*Sighs*Nobody ever believes my stories unless they see the events firsthand.

[Ninjasplaycardgames2]

IB: "Hey guys, there's this strange thing that's been happening to me lately, I'm getting kind of worried."

Cass: "Strange thing?" 

IB: "Yeah, every time the Inquisitor gets on a horse I kind of just go blank until he gets off." 

Cass: "Now that you mention it...." 

[Reznore57]

Vivienne: Tell me , dear, Is that white blanket thing you're wearing the highlight of Tevinter fashion?

Dorian: I am not wearing a "blanket".

Vivienne: A large towel , then?Is your "Empire "unaware style has improved in the last thousand years?

Dorian: What can I say , we were the highlight of civilization at one point, Madame.We would never lower ourselves and mimic barbarian cultures.

Vivienne : You are correct.You're slightly better dressed than your average Fereldan Dog Lord.

Dorian: Says the women with hat looking like a pair of Qunari horns...By the way what are you hiding under that hat?

Vivienne : I'm not hiding anything.Just enhancing my perfect features , darling.

Dorian : Well ,at least it can't be worse than Solas.Maker , we should find something to put on that poor man's head.

Vivienne:We should burn whatever he is wearing.Those pelt thing can't be healthy.

Dorian : I thought he was a beggar at first , I was about to give him some coins ...

Vivienne : I felt the same way about Cole.

Dorian: and Sera...

Vivienne: Should we talk about Blackwall's beard?

Dorian: In Tevinter , we would  call this  a facial hair disaster!

Vivienne: Maybe you're right , Dorian.Your country may be worth saving afterall.

[Basement Cat]

Team 'Last Nerve' exploring a cave

 

Inquisitor: Cassandra and I will take point. You watch our backs.

 

Sera: Will do, boss.

 

*Inquisitor and Cassandra go forward*

 

Varric: So...what do you say to a little payback?

 

Sera: What'd you have in mind?

 

Varric: Just follow my lead.

 

Sera: Ok.

 

Varric: *shouting* By the stone! What is that thing?

 

Sera: *shouting as well* Quick! Shoot it!

 

*Cassandra and Inquisitor come rushing back*

 

Varric: Made you run!

 

Cassandra: *exasperated sigh*

 

Inquisitor: Well played. Jerks.

 

Varric and Sera: We heard that!

[Reznore57]

Dorian :So how should I call you?

TIB:Everyone call me Bull?Why are you asking?

Dorian : Oh well , Bull sounds so ....informal.

Vivienne: And ridiculous.

Dorian: almost bestial...

TIB: Well ,call me The Iron Bull then...

Dorian : Wait...Monsieur The Iron Bull, maybe?Does it work?

Vivienne : Still sounds terrible.Some ladies at the court had dogs with more inspired names.

TIB: Did I tell about my last idea?I feel like throwing someone suddenly...

Vivienne :I think our friend Dorian should volunteer.

Dorian:  I'll pass thanks.

Vivienne : Are you sure?Redeeming Tevinter , smashing your head against the ground?Sounds the same to me...

TIB: The first one ?Sounds stupid !...the other?FUUUUUUN....!

Dorian: Oh just shut up ,  Mister Mayhem.

[cjones91]

Ena:"So...you knew the Hero of Fereldan and the Champion of Kirkwall,is that right Cullen?"

 

Cullen:"Yes I did."

 

Ena:"And not once did you decide to write a story about your encounters with them?Think of the coin you could have made."

 

Cullen:"It was'nt something I had in mind at the time...but maybe I will keep a record of every person I've met who went on to change the world."

 

Ena:"Hahaha!Well I hope you include me in that record if you decide to make one."

 

Cullen:"Of course I will.You are the only one who can stop this disaster after all."

[MisterJB]

Cassandra: "Bullshit!"

Iron Bull "What, right now? In front of everyone?"

[Lukas Trevelyan]

Team 'Last Nerve' out on the field

 

Sera: So, you say she is a 'Seeker'?

 

Varric: That's right.

 

Sera: What's she seek, exactly?

 

Varric: The truth, as it were.

 

Sera: She came to you for that?! Not the smartest move, no offense.

 

Varric: None taken. You see, she has to seek the truth. Finding it is not part of her job description.

 

Sera: Ah, that makes sense then.

 

Cassandra: *sigh* I can hear you, you know.

 

Sera: I certainly hope so. We're right behind you. 

 

Inquisitor: Instead of finding ways to irritate Cassandra, you should think of how we'll kill that gigantic demon back there. *points*

 

*Sera and Varric turn around, weapons at the ready, but see nothing there*

 

Inquisitor: Made you look!

 

Cassandra: *smirk*

Shipping InquisitorxCassandra now

[TheLittleBird]

Vivienne: I've been thinking

Dorian: Yes?

Vivienne: It seems to me that a nation like Tevinter, ruled by a magical aristocracy, would fall into ruin quite quickly.

Dorian: What makes you say that?

Vivienne: Look at the current state of affairs with the Circle mages here in southern Thedas, not to even mention the rather painful business with your former mentor.

Dorian: We're not idiots, you know. In Tevinter. We are aware of the risks that come with the gift of magic.

Vivienne: And yet you let those with this same gift rule your country.

Dorian: Seems to me we've done pretty well for ourselves in that regard, First Echanter.

Vivienne: Except for the fact that over half the world seems to hate your guts.

Dorian: I suppose there's that.

[The Ascendant]

All mage party. Dalish Mage Inquisitor, Solas, Dorian and Vivienne.
Solas: I knew joining the Inquisition was a good idea.
Dorian: How so?
Solas: We have a representative of all the major perspectives of magic. Apostate, Tevinter, Circle of Magi and the Dalish. Just imagine what we can learn from each other?
Inquisitor: Are you sure this hat goes well with my robe?
Vivienne: Absolutely your Eminence, you will be the envy of mages everywhere.
Dorian: You were saying?
Solas: Wake me up when we finished discussing fashion and more on the nature of magic.

[TheLittleBird]

Dorian: I get the need to protect others against the dangers of magic, but sewing their mouths shut?

Iron Bull: Are you talking about the Saarebas?

Dorian: Yes. I mean, what's their purpose? Everyone in the Qun has a purpose, right?

Iron Bull: Well, they're mostly used as weapons. 'Adaar', as would be our word for it. Rough translation. Actually, it might be a better name for them...

Dorian: I still don't understand why you'd sew their mouths shut.

Iron Bull: It's a precaution used only in extreme cases. But I understand your distaste. If it were to happen to one of your people...

Dorian: Like the magisters? Well, by all means, please, go right ahead! Would get them to shut up, at least.

Iron Bull: Haha! I'm beginning to understand why you left.

[LadyMacTir]

Vivienne: Get rid of your nasty beard, you man-bear, or work on your tish manners! I can even tell what you had for lunch today. Those disgusting nug bones are still trapped in your filthy facial hair.

Blackwall: Indeed, I remember eating nugs. Yesterday.

Vivienne: You are even more revolting than I thought. You are not just a wild pig, but a cannibal. A boar eating nugs. Disgusting.

Blackwall: So am I now a bear or a boar?

 

(depending on who is in the party)

Iron Bull (enthusiastic): Beer? Who said beer?!

Varric: ...and I thought you were a griffon. Even had a nickname, Feathers.

Sera: A boareskarn. You're even tainted! (laughs)

Dorian: That's why I prefer moustaches.

Solas: So she has found a new victim. (sighs)

Cole: A man?

Cassandra: Bullshit. Nug filet was the day before yesterday.

[ParagonPunk]

Sera: So, Bull, what do you think of the company the Inquisitor keeps?

Iron Bull: Hmm, I'd break at least half of them.

Sera: I think Blackwall and Miss Stoic could handle you.

Cole: Miss Stoic? Wh- who's that?

Iron Bull: *laughing* The Seeker.

Cole: Are you going to fight her and the Warden?

Sera: *snorts*

Iron Bull: No, kid. I might break them. *waggles eyebrows* Get it?

Cole: Uhh... no.

Iron Bull: We really need to find you a strumpet.

Cole: Is that some sort of pastry?

Iron Bull: *Laughs*

[TheLittleBird]

I suddenly felt the urge to write banter for unusual ships, so I did - so here are some intercompanion-relationship banters that make no bloody sense, and actually made me cringe a little (even though I wrote them).

- - - - - - - - - -
Sera: I've been meaning to thank you for last night, Cole.

Cole: It was my pleasure. And yours, evidently.

Sera: 'Twas a night to remember. Bloody hell.

Cole: Oh I doubt that, my love.

- - - - - - - - - -
Varric: If you keep it up like this, Bull, I might break sooner than Bianca.

Iron Bull: Oh I've been doing some presses, lately. But what's that about Bianca?

Varric: Oh, with a guy like you, I have no need for a crossbow anymore. Besides, I don't think I can bear such a big load of... bolts any longer.

- - - - - - - - - - -
Vivienne: Dear, your clothes are so comfortable! I don't understand why I used to hate them so much.

Solas: I wish I wouldn't have to wear this ridiculous hat.

Vivienne: Oh please, dear, it's the latest fashion! You look just like one of those silly Qunari mages right now.

Solas: I look nothing like them.

Vivienne: Well, dear, your meals taste nothing like actual food, but you don't hear me complaining.
- - - - - - - - - - -

Sorry. Serious banter later.

[Feybrad]

I suddenly felt the urge to write banter for unusual ships, so I did - so here are some intercompanion-relationship banters that make no bloody sense, and actually made me cringe a little.

*snip*

Sorry. Serious banter later.

 

o_O

[TheLittleBird]

I'll make up for it with Varric-banter when I have the time later, promise.

[ParagonPunk]

I suddenly felt the urge to write banter for unusual ships, so I did - so here are some intercompanion-relationship banters that make no bloody sense, and actually made me cringe a little.
-snip-
Sorry. Serious banter later.

 

LMAO.

Leave room for the Maker.

[Ninjasplaycardgames2]

Varric X Iron Bull is now my non Inquiz romancing Bull ship, thank you TheLittleBird

[Jewlie Ghoulie]

That was hilarious.