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[Elfyoth]

Cassandra, Varric

 

 

Varric: I heared there is a new bookstore in Orlais wanna go there Cass?

 

Cass: Why would I want to go to a bookstore in Orlais?

 

Varric: Becouse the store near it is a weapons stor and you'll have planty of papers to stab..!

 

Cass: Varric you are a fool you know it? Go kiss your Bianca and shut up.

 

Varric: There is no need gettic Bianca involved in this conversation you know!

 

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Sera, Solas, Cass, Varric, Inquisitor(Male Elf)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Solas: Remember that time I have flirted with you Sera?

 

Sera: You said we'll never talk about that moment again...

 

Solas: My dearest apologie, see Cass for example she likes flirting with Varric becouse he's chest hair...

 

Sera: What does it have to do with our conversation exactly?

 

Solas: Well I like flirting with you becouse of your big..

 

Sera: I have already told you Solas, I am a Lesbian, deal with it, no I won't suddenly become straight  DEAL WITH IT!

 

Solas: But we all know Cassandra is a Lesbian too.

 

Cass: No I'm not, and I DO NOT FLIRT WITH VARRIC you foolish mage.

 

Inquisitor: Well, Solas get over it, I have flirted with her too and she is a Lesbian, deal with it.

 

Varric: Well oh Cass, there is somthing you have wanted to tell me honey?

 

Cass: This conversation ends HERE!

 

Sera: Agreed.

 

 

 

 

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

 

 

Sera: What is it now Varric?!

Varric: You should'nt use a bow honey, get a crossbow.

Inquisitor(Male,Mage,Lavellan): I'd say you should use a bow, or a staff...

Viv: What are you talking about pesants...

Cassandra: Viv, you should change your clothes, they are filled with blood and that may drag dangerous animals.

Viv: What you just said, ******?

Cass: How did you call me?!

Lavellan: Hey hey, ladies relax!

Cass: I won't relax after that whor-

Viv: I am NOT  switching my clothes!

Sera: What did you say Varric?

Varric: No-nothing Sera lets grab a beer or somthing..

Viv: ******

Cass: Mage Snobish bi-

Dorian: I could'nt not watching this fight and I thought to my self hey, why not grab an Antivan wine and have some fun

Varric: Great idea!

Cass: You who-

Viv: *Chukels* you think that iunsulted me?

Lavellan: Well  Ladies.. Rela-

Cass: Yes!

Viv: You was wrong!

Cass: Really?

Viv: Lets end this *Casting a spell*

Cass: *Protecting herself with a shield*

Lavellan: THAT'S ENOUGH! Remember the reason we are here!

Cass: I guess you are right Inquistor

Viv: I guess so...

Sera: *Claps her arms and laughs...*

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

 

Cass: Elf.

 

Solas: Cass.

 

Cass: You are a fade expert and an apostate right?

 

Solas: Yes...

 

Cass: You are playing a dangerous game by playing with the fade.

 

Solas: I am not "playing with the fade" I just know a lot about it.

 

Cass: Anyone that know about the fade or have a connection to it is a threat to the world, I think that the Inquisitor should expell you from the Inquisiton and kill you.

 

Solas: Really? What about Wynne? She had a connection to the Fade I heared, and she helped the warden END  the blight.

 

Cass: Well her IQ was higher than yours.

 

Solas: Why you..

 

Lavellan(Rift Mage): Cass you know I am an expert with the fade too

 

Cass: Yes but your IQ is higher than this fool..

 

Solas: This conversation ends here!

Modifié par Elfyoth, 06 octobre 2014 - 08:25 .

[Basement Cat]

Blackwall: What do you think this mark on your hand means?

 

Inquisitor: It means I must kill the demons!

 

Blackwall: No, Inquisitor. You are the demons.

 

And then the Inquisitor was a zombie.

[Elfyoth]

Viv: Sera.

 

Sera: Yes?

 

Viv: Today I thought about changing my simple dress into a more specific green looking one what do you think?

 

Sera: Err...

 

Viv: Oh btw, your dress is in need of change too, your breasts are simply to small make them bigger.

 

Sera: Excuse me?!

 

Viv: Your shoes look terribly ugly, take Dorian's taste it is marveouls.

 

Dorian: Yes it is quite remarkable.

 

Sera: Viv please stop giving me advises...

 

Viv: Oh I didn't know I was such insulting, if you want males to look at you--

 

Sera: I DONT want males to look at me.

 

Solas: She don't... *cries*

 

Cass: What happend Elf?

 

Viv: Cass you look terribly awfoul today.

 

Cass:...

 

Sera: Well, Viv, if you want to talk about fashion talk with Dorian..

 

Viv: Pesants.

 

Cass: Viv.

 

Viv: Yes dear Seeker?

 

Cass: Pleas shut up.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Varric: Sera, *Laughs* remember yesterday?

 

Sera: *Laughs* yes when that poor fellow have talked to  Viv  flirted with her and she gave him a lecture about clothes HAHA!

 

Viv: He was a pesant, nothing more, he flirted with me trying to turn me on but he did not becouse of he's poor choice of clothes *sigh* sadly...

 

Varric: Who cares about clothes my dear?

 

Viv: I have expected that question for a long time from a Dwarf that dont have beards but he does have a chest hair.

 

Varric: Please how many times I must say it to how many pepoles, my face is hear not hear, first Isabela--

 

Viv: Who's Isabela?

 

Cass: A ****, a pirate... From what I have heared at least.

 

Viv: Oh well well, Cassandra my DEAR SEEKER!

 

Cass: What?

 

Viv: There's a **** here too. YOU.

 

Cass: Why you...

 

Varric: Girls, please!

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Varric: *sight*

 

Viv: what's wrong pesant?

 

Cassandra: Oh well who's here, our mage-****

 

Viv: Why you bad taste of clothes

 

Cass: ******

 

Viv: ******

 

Cass: Mage.

 

Viv: That needed to insult me?

 

Varric: *sigh*

 

Viv: Short hair!

 

Cass: Horn hat!

 

Varric: *sigh.......*

 

Viv: Man lady

 

Cass: Snob.

 

Viv: Hair chest.

 

Varric: What?

 

Cass: Make up face!

 

Varric: Wait wati ladies!

 

Cass: WHAT?!

 

Viv: WHAT?!

 

Viv: WHAT?!

 

Varric: Viv whay you said "WHAT" like a crazy lady in a middle of nug cave? TWICE!

 

Viv: Becouse I have wanted to.

 

Cass: Lets end this coversation!

 

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Varric: Sera!

 

Sera: Yes my drunken buddy?

 

Varric: Today I have wanted to tell you I am shaving my chest hair.

 

Sera: WHAT?!

 

Viv: YES! Finally get that dirty chest hair off your dirty body!

 

Sera: Why?!

 

Viv: Becouse he want to?!

 

Sera: Varric don't listen to that Horn hat!

 

Viv: Horn hats are beutiful!

 

Varric: I am joking ladies!

 

Sera: Thank goodness!

 

Viv: Dammn it

[Elfyoth]

Sera: So you and the Inquisitor ah?

 

Cass: That's none of your bussines.

 

Sera: Have you two shagged already?

 

Cass: THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSSINES!!!

 

Sera: It is when you do it in my room.

 

Cass: WHAT?! We don't  "do it" in your room..

 

Sera: Ah... I see you have shagged..

 

Cass: Who told you it>?!!!

 

Sera: You now...

 

Cass: Why you...

 

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Cass: Sera, you should moan more quietly you wake everyone up!

 

Sera: Oh my moaning is fine unlike you and the Inquisitor.

 

Cass: Excuse me?!

 

Sera: Yes yes... What was that white stuff

 

Cass: You are so gross!

 

Sera: I am saying the truth!

 

Cass: Oh why you--

 

Sera: Am just saying.

 

Cass: ...

 

Sera: There's nothing to be ahsamed of, if you go to the soliders quarter you'll see a lot of.

 

Inquisitor: Sera please please PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE stop talking about "white stuff"....

 

Sera: Okay so I'll talk about woman's ******.

 

Inquistor: Thats better..

 

Cass: Inquisitor... We need to talk later, ALONE.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Solas: So templar.

 

Cullen: Yes A-P-O-S-T-A-T-E!

 

Solas: You'll get what's coming for you. After all of this is over, like all templars should.

 

Cullen: Same to you apostate.

 

Sera: You guys should be QUIET! I am trying to make Leliana angry.

 

Leliana: She is, maker's mercy.

[The Ascendant]

Cassandra and Adaar

Cass: So what were you doing at the peace gathering?

Adaar: I was with a mercenary band hired by the Chantry to keep the peace. You humans are always so eager to kill each other. Don't think that the irony of the Chantry using Qunari mercs to keep the peace isn't lost on me.

Cass: Did you know what the meeting was about?

Adaar: Humans in skirts fighting humans in dresses in a temple dedicated to a corpse. That's what the boss told me.

Cass: The war between the Templars and Mages is far more complicated than that!

Adaar: Really? Is that why you threatened me when we first met? Or was it simply your Chantry's racism against my people?

Cass: I am not racist!

Adaar: Maybe not. But your Chantry is hardly the most tolerant of people. 

[XMissWooX]

***outside a dragon's lair***
Inquisitor: "So, does everyone remember the plan?"
Iron Bull: "I remember it. It has me running around squawking at the blighted thing like an idiot."
Inquisitor: "We just need you hold it's attention for a short while."
Iron Bull: "Hmmph."
Varric: "Don't worry, Bianca and I are pros at this."
Inquisitor: "Right. Here goes nothing..."
***they creep forward***
Iron Bull: *whispers* "Inquisitor?"
Inquisitor: "Yes Bull?"
Iron Bull: "If I don't make it out of this, make sure Varric doesn't get my coin stash."
Inquisitor: "You have a coin stash?"
Iron Bull: "Ah! It's cleverly hidden, so don't get any ideas."
Inquisitor: "...It's under your bed, isn't it?"
Iron Bull: "B*gger!"



Sera: "Inquisitor! *It's* done it again - this time it's dumped these weird grey mushrooms all over my bed!"
Cole: "But those weren't even for you, they were for the Inquisitor!"
Sera: "Then why did you put them on *my* bed?"
Cole: "Because it's the Inquisitor's bed too."
Inquisitor: "...You know, he's smarter than you think."



Varric: "...and then the idol explodes in her face, and Meredith lets out this ear-splitting scream - "aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!" - and suddenly, she's nothing but a hunk of lyrium sitting smack bang in the middle of the gallows courtyard!"
Sera: "Woah! And you were really there for the whole thing?"
Varric: "Of course! From the beginning to the end. I watched Hawke's whole story unfold."
Inquisitor: "If your legs moved as fast as your mouth, Varric, we would be back at Skyhold by now."
Varric: "Oh, don't mind her. She's just testy because her brand new hat got blown away a couple of miles back."
Inquisitor: Oh, shut up."

[Elfyoth]

Leliana: Viv stop starring at me it's disturbing!

 

Viv: I have thought about changing your red hair

 

Leliana: What?

 

Solas: Here it begins...

 

Viv: Your hair does no proud to Orlais where you was born, you look ugly.

 

Leliana: The Maker have decided me to have a red haqir, I follow the Maker's orders.

 

Viv: It seems the "Maker" have bad taste of clothes and fashion hmmf.

 

Leliana: Everyone with he's or her's personal thought and opinnion, that is why the Maker is merciful.

 

Viv: Hmmf, my thought and opinnion is that you do NO  good for Orlais.

 

Leliana: You mean by allying with a gray warden to stop a blight that could've come to Orlais?

 

Viv: It would be very good if Fereldan had burned to ashes and have let Oralis reclaim it.

 

Leliana: Or by trying to save the world, with the Inquisitor?

 

Viv: ...

 

Leliana: That's what I thought.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Sera: Varric, I talked with Leliana the other day, and I thought. Hey, maybe I should belive in the maker!?

 

Varric: What?!

 

Sera: Yes who are we where have we come from.

 

Varric: You know from where when a man and a woman love each other--

 

Sera: No, not that, from where the first person came from?

 

Varric: He have done it with the first woman..

 

Sera: *sigh*

 

Varric: Don't get your self involved with things that dont have an answer simple.

 

Sera: I will still pay attention to what Leliana says, or the Chantry priests.

 

Varric: You are not the "Priesty" type if you get me.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Sera: Varric remember our conversation about the maker?

 

Varric: That again? You didint drink in a while, come on come here get some beer honey.

 

Sera: No, I do not want to, and if you are not taking me serious I will end this conversation.

 

Varric: Fine fine, cmon lets see what you gotta say.

 

Sera: I have desided that all of what Leliana have said is bullshit.

 

Varric: Good to have you back honey.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Cass: Viv, you stole somthing that is very dear to my heart.

 

Viv: Oh what is it "Dear seeker".

 

Cass: You have taken a picture of a young mage of mine?

 

Viv: Yes.

 

Cass: Why?

 

Viv: You've moaned to loudly, I couldn't bare it anymore, so I've burned it.

 

Cass: You did WHAT?!

 

Viv: This is life "dear seeker"

 

Cass: I'll show you what is a "DEAR SEEKER" come here!!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Varric: So you get me right honey?

 

Sera: Sure Varric, I need a bigger bed for threesome.

 

Inquisitor: How can all your talk be about sex?

 

Sera: Sex is life my dear Elven Inquisitor.

 

Solas: How long... TO SKYHOLD!

 

Sera: It'll be a long time, want to hear my story of the litle stupid bunny that walked around touching pepoles faces and drinking?

 

Solas: Hmm... No thanks?

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Cass: So you must be Hawke...

 

Hawke: Hello?

 

Cass: You know how much trouble you've made in Kiwkwall, your friend here Varric told me the epic story of yours, tell me the real thing, tell me whats really happend there.

 

Hawke: Oh it began with...

 

Varric: This is inapropiate Cassandra, I told you the truth.

 

Cass: Bullshit!

 

Varric:...

 

Inquisitor: What you guys talking about?

 

Cass: Nothing!

 

Varric: Nothing!

 

Inquisitor: Okay...

 

Hawke: Well, Varric its been a long time.

 

Varric: Yes its been a long time my friend. What about Isabela?

 

Hawke: You know...

 

Varric: Yes yes.. Anyway, I have heared that she got..

 

Cass: Do not give me spoilers of your story Varric! I demand you will tell me the rest later.

 

Varric: You heared the lady.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Varric: Well, seeker.

 

Cass: Varric.

 

Varric: Are you virgin?

 

Cass: that's none of your bussnies.

 

Varric: I have just wanted to know.

 

Cass: So?! Let me as you the same thing Dwarf.

 

Varric: Very well, no I have done it a lot of times of pirate ladies and whores.

 

Cass: Thanks for the honesty Varric.

 

Varric: Now will you tell me?

 

Cass: No

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Iron Bull: So Sera have you ever killed somone?

 

 

Sera: Err, yes? Maybe you have seen it!?

 

Iron Bull: Erm Good point!

 

Sera: Good point indeed wanna drinks later?

 

Iron Bull: No, I have made a lonely man's talk with Varric.

Sera: Oh okay.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Leliana: So the maker is a powerful grateful one with the powers of giving the life to te world, lying in the black city...

Solas: Bla bla bla- black city- bla bla bla maker.

Leliana: You are not taking it seriously, shame on you!

Solas: Shame on you and your pasthetic chant and your pathetic city!

Leliana: But as a fade expert you know there is a black city

Solas: you have a proof that the maker is in there?

Leliana:....

Solas: That's what I thought.

[Milan92]

**Skyhold tavern**

 

Iron Bull: *sings* "We'll kill ourselves a demon!"

 

Blackwall: *sings* "Or maybe two or three!"

 

All: *sings* "We're stalwart men and bold of the inquisition's company!"

 

*music continues*

 

Varric: "So, how do you suppose this story will end?"

 

Inquisitor: "Like all the others, I suppose. I've heard dozens of stories, Varric. Why should this one end any different?"

 

All: *sings* "Its glory, god and gold and our inquisition's company!"

[Stronglav]

LOL where did you get all this?

I haven't laughed so hard since Morri and Zevran banther.

God I miss DAO.Hilarious dialogues.

[_Marjolaine_]

It's not even funny ... oh ... well ... 

 

Lavellan and Bull run after a failed assassin. The elf stops, shots an arrow, but misses. 

Lavellan - angrily: 'Alas'rahn!'

Bull 'You say that a lot. What does that mean?'

Lavellan - still angry: 'Vashedan.'

(Alas'rahn is not a 'canon' Dalish curse, But I think elves need their own bad words.)

[The Ascendant]

Cassandra and Trevelyan Mage

Cass: Which Circle were you a part of?

Trev: Ostwick. Life was good there for the most part. Being a Trevelyan meant that no one would mess with me. My family was important. The Templars never bothered me much. Then I heard about Kirkwall. How could they try and kill an entire Circle for the actions of one apostate?

Cass: Knight Commander Meredith was mad.

Trev: And yet your order, the self professed 'guardians' did nothing for three years while Meredith turned the city into a police state. Good work. Thank the Maker for the Champion. Also a Mage who did far more for the city than the Templars ever did.

Cass: So why were you at the gathering if you didn't want peace?

Trev: History. The temple of the Sacred Ashes is a site of great historical interest. Or it was.

[Zakhar]

Solas: "So you come from the Circle?"

Mage Trevelyan: "The Circle of Ostwick yes. Pleasant enough until Annulment was calles."

Solas: "The Templars called annulment? On innocent mages?"

Trevelyan: "I would not call them innocent. A radical Enchanter had killed the Knight-Commander. I had tried to talk everyone down but when young men have a cause in their hearts..."

Solas: "You do not support the rebellion? Mages gaining their freedom?"

Trevelyan: "I do not support murder and terrorism breaking apart the carefully constructed peace and the advancements the Circle has made."

Solas: "So you wish to allow the Chantry to have control over mages again?"

Trevelyan: "I wish for order to be restored before we make things worse for ourselves."

[Al Foley]

Varric: So...you don't like nobles much. 

 

KT:  What is that?  A question? A statement...I do not know what to do with that Varric. 

 

Varric: It was an observation. 

 

KT: I see. 

Varric: Just you are a noble, and in my experience most people who are born into nobility tend to like it, or if you find yourself in nobility like Hawke.  Yet, you don't. 

 

KT:  Since I am a noble and raised by nobles I have seen the worse the breed has to offer. 

 

Varric:  Such as? 

 

KT: *sighs* Only worrying about themselves and their own power, or that Lady what's her face held her fork in the wrong hand...the scandal Varric, the scandal!  No I feel much more sympathy for Commoners, who are much more concerned with their own survival rather then the sillyness of their betters. 

 

Varric: So, you would rather have nobles butting into our business and ruling us?

 

KT: *snorts* Hardly!  I do not want anyone to rule, just, that if we have to...maybe it would be better to have someone who appreciates survival, rather then being overstuffed and pompous. 

 

Viv: I heard that. 

 

KT: You were meant to! *To Varric* Maybe that is why I was chosen. 

 

Varric: I see.

[DRTJR]

Iron Bull: Seeker. I have a question.

 

Cass: Good for you.

 

Iron Bull: Your family is known for killing dragons, or is it another group of humans?

 

Cass: Yes the Pentagasts are famous for dragon slaying?

 

Iron Bull: Great! do you know what a dragon tastes like?

 

Cass: My family is more well known for ... What?

 

Iron Bull: You know dragons, those giant flying lizards.

 

Cass: You want to eat a dragon! 

 

Iron Bull: You say that like I just claimed to be your mother. 

 

Cass: You saw a dragon flying in the distance and your fist thought was CAN I EAT IT!

 

Iron Bull: No it was, It's so tiny I can squish it.

 

Cass: They taste like a chicken.

 

Varric: Bullshit, no offence.

 

Sera: Say what?!

 

Solas: There's a joke buried in here i can make... 

 

Vivian: YOU'VE EATEN A DRAGON!

 

Dorian: The blood has a nice tangy taste to it.

 

Inquisitor: Okay, I'm impressed. 

 

Inquisitor[romancing Cass]: Not going here, just walking forward.

 

Inquisitor[romancing IB]: That explains the breath.

 

Iron Bull: Wow... that's both amazing and kind of disappointing.

 

Cass: now you know. 

[JAZZ_LEG3ND]

Hah, of course they taste like chicken.

[d1ta]

Omg, this thread is full of win and it has been sucking my 'likes' quota like quicksand XD.
Keep up the fine work, folks.. It's all I can say since I'm not talented at writting XD

[Violet Carson]

Cole and Blackwall

Cole: You are going to venture into the Deep Roads, right?

Blackwall: There comes a time when every Grey Warden must answer the Calling.

Cole: It sounds very dangerous. Can I accompany you?

Blackwall: No, Cole. It is something I must do alone.

Cole: But if you go alone you might be hurt.

Blackwall: I will die. That's what the Calling is. When the taint becomes too much a Grey Warden will journey to the Deep Roads to slay as many darkspawn as possible before dying himself.

Cole: That sounds terrible.

Blackwall: It is a sacrifice I've been aware of since I first joined my brothers and sisters against the darkspawn.

Cole: But why do this? Is it not human nature to seek preservation above all else?

Blackwall: Every darkspawn I've killed could have murdered an entire family or spread their taint to others had I not been there to stop it. I do seek preservation but it is not of myself. It is of every living creature on Thedas.

Cole: Do you regret your decision?

Blackwall: My choice to wear the Grey Warden insignia is not one I look at with regret but with happiness that even though I may not have turned the tide of the war I at least saved a family from being destroyed.

[Al Foley]

Varric:  So...you're a mage right? 

 

Benjamin Trevelyan:  Yes I am a mage Varric..what gave it away...the staff? 

 

Varric:  Just you seem unusual for a mage, at least in my experience. 

 

BT:  How so? 

 

Varric...when I knew the Champion he usually took nothing but mages along with him, and then me.  It was always me and two mages.  And our little band we had one blood mage, an abomination, and were led by an apostate who resisted the Chantry and hid from them for decades.  None of the mages I know are really fond of the Circle, yet you are. 

 

BT: *sighs* I am not exactly a fan of the Circle. 

 

Varric:  But, you do not want to tear it down? 

 

BT:  Revolutions and rebelions are perfectly fine on paper.  But when you start one without a plan of what to do with it after that is a recipe for disaster.  While I am sympathetic to the Libertarians, while I agree the Circle needs to change, the one thing that none of the rebels seem to be considering is what to do with their freedom after the fact.  How they will keep themselves, as well as others safe in the New Order.  *sighs* No the Circle may be an evil but for the moment it seems to be a neccessary one, until someone can find a better solution. 

[Elfyoth]

Solas: So Viv.

Viv: Yes Elf?

Solas: From where you come from?

Viv: From Orlais, unlike barbarians with pathetic taste of clothes from other nations, like you.

Solas: Do you support the mage rebellion?

Viv: I do not.

Solas: Why?

Viv: Cuz it'll bring pathetic chaos to Thedas.

Enansel Lavellan(Rft Mage): Really? But it'll bring freedom to the mages.

Viv: And chaos to the world.

EL: But the Dalish Elves live well with mages that have freedom, one of the reasons we run is becouse of the templars.

Viv: Well dear Inquisitor, think, how many times a Dalish clan dies from an abomanetion?

EL: Not a lot from what I recall

Viv: Well whatever you choose you are the Inquisitor, it is your responsabillty to bring ORDER to Thedas and its pepole, and it wont happen with mage freedom. It would bring anarchy to the world.

EL: And who told you that, your templar overlords?

Viv: No, and I have no wish to continue this disscustion with a person that have never lived in the circle.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Varric: Honey, you remaind me of Riviani.

Sera: Who's "Riviani"?

Varric: A pirate woman that know how to live.

Sera: It's not her true name right?

Varric: Not gonna tell you.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Hawke: Varric! It's good to see you again my friend.

Varric: Hawke!

Bethany: Hi Varric!

Leliana: Hello Hawke, and Bethany my name is--

Bethany: THE RED HAIRED SISTER FROM LOTHERING!

Leliana: I guess you know me?

Bethany: Oh Of course I know you! I missed your stories from the Lothering chantry so much.

Leliana: I guess I should be flattered.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

[LadyMacTir]

Cole: You remind me of Wynne. She was nice and old. Like you.

 

Blackwall: *coughs* Thanks for the nice part, dear ghost boy, but I am by no means old.

 

Cole: She was good. And she had a marvelous bosom. There were women half her age who have not held up half so well. Perhaps it was a magical bosom?

 

Blackwall: A marvelous bosom? Nothing compares to a marvelous bea- What did you say? A BOSOM? I thought you had an innocent mind?

 

Cole: It must have been magical if it could calm an assassin when he was crying, mustn't it? Leliana told me a beautiful good night story.

 

Blackwall: The magic of a female bosom is indeed powerful, son. But not in the way you think. But...let me tell you another good night story tonight. Wanna hear about mighty griffons and the Warden heroes of old?

 

Cole: I'm so sorry. Today is Varrics turn...

 

Blackwall: (to Varric) DON'T YOU EVER SPOIL HIM, DWARF! I know what you told the Seeker about Bethany's "features"!

 

Varric: Andraste’s bosom, almost as prudish as Wynne...

[A.Kazama]

Found videos of Cass and Varric banter, guessing here's a good place to put it.

ACTUAL BANTER:

 

1^st conversation – 4:38:
 

 

Cassandra: I hear reconstruction is progressing well in Kirkwall.

 

Varric: I know things are bad there.

 

 

Cassandra: I wasn't trying to...

 

 

Varric: You weren't trying to remind me how bad it is in Kirkwall? So you decided to talk about it?

 

Cassandra: About its Recovery!

 

Varric: What you’re talking about are the buildings, and even that will take years. People don’t recover so easily.

 

 

*

 

 

2^nd Conversation - 10:07:

 

Cassandra: I think it’s time you stopped playing the wounded party with me, Varric.

 

 

Varric: Ignoring the times you actually wounded me?

 

 

Cassandra: I did no such thing. I questioned you, and then brought you to Haven so you could tell your story to the Divine.

 

 

Varric: What then? “Thanks, Varric! We believe you! See you around!”

 

 

Cassandra: And ignoring the fact you did lie to me.

 

 

Cassandra: Do not pretend to be an innocent bystander – I could have done far worse, with full justification.

 

 

Varric: Yes, Thank you for not torturing me. I’m so much happier now.

 

 

*

 

 

3^rd Conversation - 13:45:

 

 

Cassandra: Have you been taking notes on all this, Varric?

 

Varric: You’ll need to be more specific there, Seeker.

 

 

Cassandra: The Inquisition! You’re not planning to write a book about us, are you?

 

 

Varric: Don’t get your hopes up. You’re not that interesting a subject.

 

 

 

Here's video if you wanna find it:

[Wolfen09]

and here i thought varric would have laughed all of that stuff that happened between him and cassandra off....  here's hoping they didnt anders him up

[A.Kazama]

and here i thought varric would have laughed all of that stuff that happened between him and cassandra off....  here's hoping they didnt anders him up

I dunno, I don't think he's angry per se. If you listen to the banter a lot of his comments are pretty wry, meaning his humour should still be intact. 

[Warden Commander Aeducan]

(This is my first post in this thread, and I'm not too keen on writing banter dialogues so feel free to criticize. This banter was inspired by Cassandra and Adaar banter from ciarhdap. Please don't kill me for this, and I really like Varric but this is how I always imagine the early stage of Varric relationships with my Qunari (Vashoth) Inquisitor. It will be difficult at first for both to accept each other, but I hope they will overcome and respect each other).

Varric: So...a Qunari as Inquisitor and Herald of Andraste.
Adaar: Is there a problem?
Varric: Nothing, I just find it ironic that Cassandra decided that you're the only one fit to lead the Inquisition. I mean a Qunari of all people! Who would have thought they are desperate enough to turn to a Qunari for help.
Adaar: Varric, you are free to express your concern...bu- *being interrupted by Varric*
Varric: You know exactly what I'm thinking, Inquisitor. I don't want to see you oxmen use the Inquisition as mean to convert people or burn another city and slaughter people!
Adaar: Come on, Varric. You are better than this, and I am not one of the Qunari. I am Tal-Vashoth, to me the Qun is a lie and I wish what happen in Kirkwall could have gone better.
Varric: I don't care about your beliefs or what you are, Inquisitor. You could be a very large dwarf with comical accents. Qunari or Tal-Vashoth...I don't see the differences. Once you oxmen was given a power you're bond to start trouble. Why should I listen to anything you have to say.
Adaar: Because I was never there, Varric. I have never been to Kirkwall before, and I am not responsible for what happen in Kirkwall. Not every Qunari or Tal-Vashoth is responsible for Kirkwall Incident. You of all people should have known better than this.
Varric: I...point taken. Hmph, never thought I would ever listen to an oxmen.
Adaar: Never thought I try to reasoning with a stubborn midget.

[Basement Cat]

I dunno, I don't think he's angry per se. If you listen to the banter a lot of his comments are pretty wry, meaning his humour should still be intact. 

Cassandra comes off as having a very high opinion of herself. That probably doesn't help Varric who notoriously can't stand arrogance. She doesn't seem to be too good at empathy either even when she's trying to be nice. Don't poke your fingers into an open wound and all that.

 

I must have these two with me at all times.