Yeah, one of my friends is possibly some degree of ace and that was a big factor in her recent breakup. But the communication is really, really important. It's possible he really did just get very afraid of telling you, but this is also something that should've been discussed much more in advance since it impacts you both. Even if you're understanding and okay with that, it's still not fair to you to find out like that.
I hope things are okay for you.
Thank you, yes. Our communication style is definitely something that needs to change.
Getting him to talk about anything important is like pulling teeth. I'm in university and he's... one of those types who messed around in community college for six years. After a year together I said this is an issue because I need someone who'll plan for the future. He said he had been getting his act together for the last year, had applied to several universities, and was set to transfer. "Oh, thanks for telling me." Later, over dinner with his parents (we're Jewish, and he has Shabbat dinner with them every Friday), I found out that the two universities that accepted him were the one I attend, and the one 8 hours away. I had assumed he would attend the one I attend. Then tonight I find out he picked the one eight hours away and was making living arrangements.
Again, I can see why he would pick that one and I guess I can believe that he would be afraid to tell me, but this can't go on. I can't keep finding out important information this way. (And I too can be a better sport about the "ace/not ace" issue.)
Kind of like Solas. (Bringing this back on-topic.) Solas' communication style with Lavellan can really improve. Letting Lavellan in on big life goals and moving plans that affect their relationship can improve. Letting her in on the planning process, and letting her give insight into how to get things done can really improve.
Solas: We need to break up and I need to leave.
Lavellan: Would you at least tell me why?
Solas: No.
Later.
Solas: ... And now you know.
Lavellan: You could have told me sooner.
Solas: I know.
Later.
Solas: ... And that's my plan.
Lavellan: I want to join you! / Isn't there some other way?
Solas: No.
Lavellan: Come on! Let me help. We can figure this out together.
Solas: No! I have to do this my way, alone.
Lavellan: Why?
Solas: Because I'm a vague, mysterious lone wolf and I work alone.
Lavellan: Solas, that's weak!
Solas: I know. *smooch* Goodbye, my love.