Maybe youre right. Would deceiving be a better term? Im not a natural english speaker.
He is not trying to control your choices, but he lies a lot.
Like saying he misses Court intrigue and when you ask him how he would ever have been there before he gets avasive about seeing it in the fade (you even get disapproval for asking), saying that he will tell you the Truth in the last cutscene and evading it, saying that he will explain and running away...
He is letting Lavellan choose if she wants to persue him but he knows she is doing so without all the informations to make a sane decision.
Dont get me wrong I really like his character. Flaws and all. Hes just a tragic figure, afraid to die alone.
Maybe he initially doesnt want to explain because he thinks the Inquisitor cant understand the truth. Theres enough with the Herald of Andraste stuff to wrap your mind around, hes not gonna spring 'elven god' on you.
So he lies to protect you. And then to cover that.