The fans are making it the main attraction. The actual main attraction to a BW game isn't the romances. Shoot, I've done several "nomances" of various BW games, including the Dragon Age games. If the romances were the main attraction, I would have felt like I was missing out. I never did, not for a second. I found myself too engrossed in the rest of the story to notice.
The first time I romanced someone in any BW game was ToR. I didn't even know for years about the male LI in NWN; didn't like the paladin in NWN2, and skipped the romances in BG2. Yet, I still fell in love with the company and with their style of storytelling.
So no, the writers haven't made a focus out of this. The fans have made this such a huge deal and possibly the marketing department. Which, as you know, BW has little to no control over.
Also, over the last few years since ME2 came out, the fanbase for both DA and ME has grown. Yes, even the ME fan base has grown; I finished the series for the first time a couple of weeks ago. Naturally, you're going to have a lot more folks posting and talking about romance. If you haven't noticed the twitter feed coming from the devs, they are more busy talking about the companions themselves, and about the amount of dragons that are going to be in the game. If you take any and all companion discussion by the writers and devs as "romance talk," then that's on you and not them.
Finally, E3 just finished, GaymerX is right around the corner and the buzz is in the air for DA:I. There is going to be a lot of newcomers to the forums coming to check out information and fan reaction. People love talking about sex and romance, so it stands to reason this is a very active thread.
Edit: @Huldra No worries, I'm done.
Edit#2: This was my 5000th post.