Time for some ME2 absurdities....
(Shepard chose Udina for councilor)
Miranda: He has done a great job representing humanity's interests.
Jacob: Yeah, but I'm not sure he's done enough for humanity.
Squadmate#2, on the Collectors, observing the Collector Vessel's massive storage-space for lifepods: "They're going to target Earth."
Shepard: "Not if we stop 'em!"
[The Collector fleet amounts to a whopping three vessels. One is blown up by Jimmy Vega. The Normandy eventually tears apart another, even with the standard pew-pew cannon. The third arrives only during the Reaper invasion and is taken down over Palaven. If the Collectors' plan is really to harvest Earth or even a single colony in Alliance space with one cruiser then they should not be pursued, they should be laughed at. One planetary defense-cannon would take them down, if they're not intercepted by an actual fleet. ME2's plot was a fool's errand for reasons such as this.]
Thane: If you kill a man, do you hold your gun responsible?
[If my gun signed a contract and had legs then YES, I would hold it responsible.]
Niket: From a life of wealth and happiness? You weren't saving her, you were getting back at your father!
[We've already established that Mr. Lawson is a bad enough character that Miranda had to be separated from him, but we can't do the same with her little sister unless we're absolutely sure it's what she wants? Criminy cripes.]
(Horizon)
VS: Shepard! We had no idea you're alive.
Shepard (paragon): Hey, man! What's up??
VS: That's all you have to say? It's been two years and you haven't tried to let me know you're alive!
-----
Shepard (paragon): Cerberus is guud!
---
VS: (unmistakably upset) I should report back to the Alliance, let them decide whether they believe your story.
Shepard (paragon): I could use you on my ship again. It'll be just like old times!
VS: -.- No it won't.
Neutral and even Renegade dialogue was alright here, but Paragon Shepard is utterly embarrassing in this scene.
Samara: There's no excuse for killing an unarmed civilian.
[First of all, Nihlus is a Spectre, so he is legally authorized to do that. Second, the Code allowed you to do the same to an asari on Illium who was completely defenseless. If another Justicar witnessed that and had no context, the Code would compel them to kill you, though you were yourself simply following the Code...
... yeah, I'm taking Morinth. Screw you, madam.]
Legion: Technology is not a straight line. There are many paths towards the same end. Accepting technology blinds you to alternatives.
[This is not strictly logical. Accepting technology may diminish the incentive in creating alternatives, but it does not preclude them. In fact, it may even open the door to other opportunities and make those alternatives easier to come by than they otherwise would be.]
... more to come...