634 réponses à ce sujet

[New Kid]

are you a troll or something?

just because someone is bi you won't date them? even though they are attracted to you?

thats sounds biphobic to me
 

I don't think he is trolling. I think a lot of people wouldn't be able to understand that their partner finds their own sex attractive as well as find them attractive. I personally have no problem with it, but I could see the potential anxiety it could cause.

[BioticMarauder]

If you wouldn't date a bi girl in real life, that indicates that you think they lesser for some reason and that's, uh, biphobic. 

 

What?! I don't go out with bi girls irl too but that doesn't mean I loathe them. It's just a preference. Oh and I'm offended 

[Nocte ad Mortem]

What?! I don't go out with bi girls irl too but that doesn't mean I loathe them. It's just a preference. Oh and I'm offended 

Why wouldn't you want to go with them? What's the difference? 

[Yinello]

I don't think he is trolling. I think a lot of people wouldn't be able to understand that their partner finds their own sex attractive as well as find them attractive. I personally have no problem with it, but I could see the potential anxiety it could cause.

The potential anxiety for what though? Being bi doesn't mean they're more likely to cheat.

[BioticMarauder]

Why wouldn't you want to go with them? What's the difference? 

 

I don't think he is trolling. I think a lot of people wouldn't be able to understand that their partner finds their own sex attractive as well as find them attractive. I personally have no problem with it, but I could see the potential anxiety it could cause.

 

What this guy said, mostly.

[Yinello]

But you don't know someone's sexuality unless they tell you. So if a guy meets a girl and they're both totally into each other, wouldn't it be stupid if one of them mentioned they were bisexual? If that makes the attraction less, there's something off.

 

I think it's ****** stupid that a girl wouldn't be considered an attractive partner just because she's not exclusively into guys.

[Solas]

Preference. It's what you prefer. It might not make a difference to you, but it might make a difference to someone else. It's not being shallow, it's just preference. Sometimes straight women are only attracted to gay men. Some people are only attracted to skinny people, while others are attracted to bigger people. Preferences. It may seem strange, but, well, I guess it is if you look at it that way. Can't always understand why we like what we like or why we do what we do.

Preference is like "I prefer blonds" or "I'm into redheads", not "I will not date bi people because they are bi". When you shine a light on peoples' reasons for "I will not date bi people", it tends to reveal biphobic sentiments like "they are more likely to cheat on me".

 

Edit: In response to your response below,

It is biphobic, because the only reason they wouldn't date them is because they are bi. That is a form of discrimination and as such counts as biphobia. How does someone being bi even figure into attraction, anyway? It's not a physical feature like "I'm attracted to blond girls" or a personality thing like "I can't date someone who isn't into video games because I love games so damn much!" 

 

He might not be saying it out loud but like I said, when you shine a light on those kinds of statements, the motivation and justification behind it becomes all too clear as biphobic. What does "I'm not attracted to bi people" even mean? Do bi people look a certain way? Act a certain way? If, when you're talking to someone you're attracted to physically and personality-wise, and you find out that they're bi, if that is when your "bubble bursts" then... that's biphobic, because the only reason it has burst is because they're bi.

[Nocte ad Mortem]

What this guy said, mostly.

You're afraid bisexual women are more attracted to other women, you mean? 

[Karlone123]

It could. If you start a romance with Josephine and break-up with her/lose her affection, she might go for a girl.

If Vivienne is a bisexual LI, I can totally see her dumping you for a woman and flaunting her new relationship. The woman is cold and enjoys one-upsmanship.

Vivienne strikes me as a person who does not want to be touched, plus all that "gear" she would require many efforts to go through just to shake her hand.

[Basement Cat]

The potential anxiety for what though? Being bi doesn't mean they're more likely to cheat.

A lot of people believe that. Just the other day I read a post on a blog about this guy who said that his girlfriend 'used to be bi' before she settled down with him. People don't understand how bisexuality works for the most part. They tend to confuse 'bisexual' with 'swinger'. That is a huge, huge difference.

[Yinello]

A lot of people believe that. Just the other day I read a post on a blog about this guy who said that his girlfriend 'used to be bi' before she settled down with him. People don't understand how bisexuality works for the most part. They tend to confuse 'bisexual' with 'swinger'. That is a huge, huge difference.

 

True and it's very rage inducing. I've had people tell me that 'no, I'm straight now because you married a guy'. I usually want to punch them.

[New Kid]

Preference is like "I prefer blonds" or "I'm into redheads", not "I will not date bi people because they are bi". When you shine a light on peoples' reasons for "I will not date bi people", it tends to reveal biphobic sentiments like "they are more likely to cheat on me".

 

I hate when people say that bi people are more likely to cheat, I have heard so many people say this, as well as things like they are "greedy". It's ridiculous. 

[Innsmouth Dweller]

But you don't know someone's sexuality unless they tell you. So if a guy meets a girl and they're both totally into each other, wouldn't it be stupid if one of them mentioned they were bisexual? If that makes the attraction less, there's something off.

 

I think it's ****** stupid that a girl wouldn't be considered an attractive partner just because she's not exclusively into guys.

I wouldn't date a guy who thinks Qapla' is Volcan word. even if we were totally into each other. that's one of those things that just bursts your bubble.

preferences

[Nocte ad Mortem]

Preference is like "I prefer blonds" or "I'm into redheads", not "I will not date bi people because they are bi". When you shine a light on peoples' reasons for "I will not date bi people", it tends to reveal biphobic sentiments like "they are more likely to cheat on me".

It's basically like trying to find someone that's "preference" is against people that like both Coke and Pepsi. It will be rare that you find someone who feels that way, because they'd have to be pretty invested in that person's interest. The implications in the context of bisexuality are not great.

[javeart]

Ok, didn't want to derail the thread any further, and I won't after I say this:

 

Preference is like "I prefer blonds" or "I'm into redheads", not "I will not date bi people because they are bi". When you shine a light on peoples' reasons for "I will not date bi people", it tends to reveal biphobic sentiments like "they are more likely to cheat on me".

 

And that's exactly what happened after:

 

 

 

No. Because I've witnessed few couples breaking up because of her being a bi (my brother's girlfriend as one) and going for the other team. Maybe its a man thing but loosing your girl to someone would be twice as hard if that some would be a woman.

 

 

Also, saying things like "LI' s for straight men seem to be low on Bios list these day" or "So there is only one female LI for straight men, that butch Casssandra? Wat????" when apparently he already knew Josephine was an option, it's not about stating personal preferences, it's about degrading bi females LIs. I honestly thought he was trying to sound offensive.

 

And now I'm letting it be, for good

[New Kid]

Ok, didn't want to derail the thread any further, and I won't after I say this:

 

 

And that's exactly what happened after:

 

 

 

 

 

Also, saying things like "LI' s for straight men seem to be low on Bios list these day" or "So there is only one female LI for straight men, that butch Casssandra? Wat????" when apparently he already knew Josephine was an option, it's not about stating personal preferences, it's about degrading bi females LIs. I honestly thought he was trying to sound offensive.

 

And now I'm letting it be, for good

 

Dammit! Wish I hadn't of tried to defend him now...

[Nocte ad Mortem]

I think what people don't understand here is that you don't have to be foaming at the mouth full of hate to be biphobic. If you're afraid a bi person likes the opposite gender from yourself more despite their claims otherwise, or you think they're more likely to cheat, then that's a form of biphobia and it's hurtful to bi people. It doesn't mean you're just the worst of people, but you should reconsider your stance. Bi people are not more likely to leave you for the opposite gender than anyone you date is likely to leave you for someone that more perfectly matches their physical ideal at the first chance they get. Thinking they will is a form of ignorance.

[Innsmouth Dweller]

I think what people don't understand here is that you don't have to be foaming at the mouth full of hate to be biphobic. If you're afraid a bi person likes the opposite gender from yourself more despite their claims otherwise, or you think they're more likely to cheat, then that's a form of biphobia and it's hurtful to bi people. It doesn't mean you're just the worst of people, but you should reconsider your stance. Bi people are not more likely to leave you for the opposite gender than anyone you date is likely to leave you for someone that more perfectly matches their physical ideal at the first chance they get. Thinking they will is a form of ignorance.

ok. i don't care about such discussions normally but this certain mindset makes me laugh.

 

i think tolerating other people preferences is enough. accept them? why should anyone? why should everyone else be the paragon of understanding but not people calling others biphobic?

if someone has bad experiences with bisexuals - that's not something you can wave off and call it rubbish - that is ignorance and maybe even disrespect.

[Nocte ad Mortem]

ok. i don't care about such discussions normally but this certain mindset makes me laugh.

 

i think tolerating other people preferences is enough. accept them? why should anyone? why should everyone else be the paragon of understanding but not people calling others biphobic?

if someone has bad experiences with bisexuals - that's not something you can wave off and call it rubbish - that is ignorance and maybe even disrespect.

Painting a whole group with the same brush based on experience with a few is a pretty typical manifestation of bigotry. It's especially troubling when it's not even something just being internalized, but something you're publicly discouraging a video game developer from adding to their game based on your prejudice.   

[Char]

ok. i don't care about such discussions normally but this certain mindset makes me laugh.

i think tolerating other people preferences is enough. accept them? why should anyone? why should everyone else be the paragon of understanding but not people calling others biphobic?
if someone has bad experiences with bisexuals - that's not something you can wave off and call it rubbish - that is ignorance and maybe even disrespect.

If someone -in person- had had a bad experience with a bisexual woman, I'd be disappointed that they were generalising an entire sexuality based on one bad experience. There aren't very many straight guys that quit dating straight women because one cheated on them, after all.
I could perhaps understand them being a bit jaded, but thats as far as my tolerance needs to go because to stereotype a whole sexuality is frankly ridiculous.
The person in question won't even date a bi woman in a video game because his brother had a bad experience.
My sister got bitten by a dog once, hasn't stopped anyone in the family from keeping one, because one bad experience does not write everyone off.

[Eudaemonium]

*checks thread* *looks around* *leaves thread in a hurry*