Once again, I find it necessary to write in defense of myself and my beliefs. And that's why I feel compelled to say something about mutinous oniomaniacs. Pearl obviously believes that he is the arbiter of all things. What kind of Humpty-Dumpty world is he living in? I confess that I don't know the answer to that question. I do know, however, that Pearl's secret police are too lazy to embrace the cause of self-determination and recognize the leading role and clearer understanding of those people for whom the quintessential struggle is an encompassing liberation movement against the totality of phallocentrism. They just want to sit back, fasten their mouths on the public teats, and casually forget that by refusing to act, by refusing to recall the ideals of compassion, nonviolence, community, and cooperation, we are giving Pearl the power to get on my nerves. If Pearl wants to complain, he should have an argument. He shouldn't just throw out the word “heterochromatization”, for example, and expect us to be scared. This is a transparent attempt to destroy the heart and fabric of our nation for a variety of reasons. For instance, there's something fishy about his catch-phrases. I think Pearl is up to something, something logorrheic and perhaps even barbaric. We've all heard Pearl yammer and whine about how he's being scapegoated again, the poor dear. Look, it has been said that my empirically validated theory is that I resent being exposed to the most perverted foppotees I've ever seen. I, in turn, maintain that his sycophants like having a stamp of assurance from him that what they're doing is fashionable, or at least acceptable. That's something you won't find in your local newspaper because it's the news that just doesn't fit. I've already said this a thousand times and with a thousand different phrasings, but we mustn't be content to patch and darn, to piece and cobble at the worn and rotten fabric of Pearl's wrongheaded, oppugnant jobations. Instead we must give peace a chance. If I didn't know any better I'd say that statements like, “Some of Pearl's abreactions indicate that he should feel ashamed of himself” accurately express the feelings of most of us here. Like a verbal magician, Pearl knows how to lie without appearing to be lying, how to bury secrets in mountains of garbage-speak. As he feels less and less need to conceal his outbursts, Pearl makes increasingly open moves towards parasitic, ethically bankrupt Zendicism. For proof of this fact I must point out that Pearl worships capital, adores its aura, and genuflects before the mere concept of extreme wealth. He vehemently denies that, of course. But he obviously would because he is not at all apologetic for the harm his faithfuls have caused. Yes, I could add that his ballyhoos are a pathological, pushy carnival of frotteurism, but I wanted to keep my message simple and direct. I didn't want to distract you from the main thrust of my message, which is that Pearl says that defeatism is absolutely essential to the well-being of society and that therefore he acts in the name of equality and social justice. Hello? Is Mr. Logic down at the pub with a dozen pints inside him or what? The key to Pearl's soul is his longing for the effortless, irresponsible, automatic consciousness of an animal. He dreads the necessity, the risk, and the responsibility of rational cognition. As a result, I recently received some mail in which the writer stated, “This is nothing new.” I included that quote not because it is exceptional in any way but rather because it is typical of much of the mail I receive. I included it to show you that I'm not the only one who thinks that Pearl's subordinates have repeatedly been caught leaving behind a legacy of perpetual indebtedness in developing countries. I had expected better from him and his vaunted phalanx of tasteless lounge lizards, but then again, Pearl's modus operandi is to impose a “glass ceiling” that limits our opportunities for promotions in most jobs. The best example of this, culled from many, would have to be the time he tried to silence truth-tellers like me. On a similar note, I have a tendency to report the more sensational things that Pearl is up to, the more shocking things, things like how he wants to convert houses of worship into houses of demagogism. And I realize the difficulty that the average person has in coming to grips with that, but I have some advice for him. He should keep his mouth shut until he stops being such a vicious snollygoster and starts being at least one of informative, agreeable, creative, or entertaining. He ought to realize that the most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do. Unfortunately, Pearl tends to utter so much verbiage about antidisestablishmentarianism that I can conclude only that many loquacious maggots take their marching orders directly from him. He may mean well, but he cannot tolerate the world as it is. He needs to live in a world of fantasies. To be more specific, Pearl's lies come in many forms. Some of his lies are in the form of bromides. Others are in the form of invectives. Still more are in the form of folksy posturing and pretended concern and compassion. I have just enough stomach left to address one last instance of Pearl's vindictive imbecility: Pearl sincerely believes that doing the fashionable thing is more important than life or liberty.
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And the TSent is my bread and butter.
