Nonsense. An adult is different than a preteen, both physically and mentally. The only biological difference between a Dalish with Vallaslin and one without is that one has blood and ink in their face.
Getting the tattoo is agreeing to devote your self to the clan, so I would say that counts as "super duper loyal". You could get less loyal afterwords sure, but even if you got that way the day after getting marked, that still means that for 90%-45% of your life you were devoted enough to them to give your life to them by the time Inquisition happens.
For the Dalish, no tatoo = child. Being physically mature doesn't have that much to do with it (given their background as long-living elves, that makes sense). And as a child, being entrusted with a very dangerous mission important to the Keeper is most definitely a no-go. Nor would the Keeper endanger both the mission and the Dalish Inquisitor's life just to make a point about how evil the humies are. No, it makes no sense for someone who hasn't proven their aptitude to be chosen for such a task. Obviously, Bioware agrees, since the only Dalish the Keeper sends are those who have proven themselves.
And there are different levels of devotion. Accepting a ritual because it's expected of you and/or you love your clan or family while still not liking the ritual itself happens all the bloody time in real life. Life in society is not as simple as ''I do, therefor I am 100% obedient and behind it'' and ''I don't, therefor I am a rebel who rejects everything''.





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