I'm liking your post just because now I have a better understanding of what your talking about, however....
Were we to add characters of the ilk you're asking for then we would be robbing the series of realism (as defined above), gravitas, and emotional resonance and weight; when someone can fight in bloody, brutal, vicious battles and then go home and be perfectly cheery and think about flowers, and how pretty the sunshine is, we steal the emotional value of the sacrifices the other characters are making; the ability to lead a normal life, for instance, or to be completely well-adjusted. The Inquisitor, Blackwall, Sera, etc., must all make personal sacrifice and take a certain amount of emotional and spiritual trauma in order to be noble, and save the world. If your proposed Character X comes along and saves the world while completely retaining their ability to be an emotional and spiritual innocent, as well as their wide-eyed optimism, then we step right out of realism and into a Saturday Morning Cartoon.
I feel like this is kind of what people strive for though isn't it? People who make personal sacrifices and take a certain amount of trauma, while also displaying great ability to connect and prosper as a vibrant emotional and spirtual entity. I'm sure many people want to be able to smash and grab, take the fight to everyone, but still be able to go back and be cheery and think about flowers. For any person who says "that's not possible" there is another that goes "well, maybe I could just about do it."
The thing about realism to me is that it's bounded by our own personal imaginations. In the myths, there is the person who goes, no, no one could throw the rock that far or take down the giant, it's impossible, that story is a farce, but then there is that one kid who goes no I believe it's possible, and then that one overwhelming hero that pulls it off.
it might seem impossible that someone could have almost 'perfect' kind of blend of warrior spirit and emotional enthusiasm... but whatever I have in mind is apparently not quite DA:I. In some ways, the female character I have in mind isn't really present in any game or media necessarily, I want to see someone push the boundaries in all possible ways but this hasn't quite achieved that. I'm not asking to inject some lamer character in place of one here, I'm pinpointing the issue as a lack of femininity or softness, but that doesn't mean give me Mary Poppins.
Also, if it were so easy to just think about flowers and find nice quiet times to do fun things together, then I suspect it would occur more often. I don't want to cheapen the efforts and accomplishments of flower maidens like Aeris is all. It's one thing to look at the person who initiates conversation in order to be nice and friendly and make that person feel better and say that's all well and good and now I'm going to go out in the world and do the "important thing" like smashing things down, but another thing to actually "be" that person and see how complicated it can actually get, it's not like you get flowers and go "oh look I'm nice" now I'm done. The act I'm thinking of is one where a person really lets go of their need to look cool or meet some standard and just does that thing because they want to, because they like the color blue, or the rain, or whatever. Not being negative takes as much dedication as being negative and warrior like does, IMO. They're both important things, crushing the goblins, and looking off into the starry night.
Also, that very same person also might be perfectly capable of taking up a sword, and fighting the good fight, but that exciting dual combination is not really what I see often here.
Bethany is pretty cool, it's true, but Merrill is kind of on the boring side IMO. Heck, I'd take the DA:I women over the DA2 women in many ways. And what about Hawkes mother?? Urgh....
And the last bit then.
If you do this again in another thread, in a month's time or whatever is your want, then my advice would be not to say things that imply that any woman that doesn't live up to your standards isn't a woman. Aside from what should be the very obvious problems with that type of statement . . . ? Once you have said something like that, nothing else you say really matters much. At best what you're doing is giving people spears with which to poke holes in everything you say (as they/we gleefully did), and at worst what you're doing is making it so that some people will simply never, ever listen to anything you have to say on this forum again.
This part though... most of you guys have been taking this way too literally, like I was going "they aren't women." They are women, they are aggressive women, though, and there already aggressive men. There's aggressive everyone, that's my point. I don't even know what I would say now, if I detached it from genders and just said "nicer characters" then it's simply my sole remaining feedback post which people were like durr I don't know what you mean.
baking red velvet cupcakes in a frilly pink apron.
See it sounds like Peach from Super Mario RPG right?? But guess what, she also uses that frying pan to pursue and destroy a world destroying entity deep in the pit of hell.