3344 réponses à ce sujet

[Maria13]

Well I was planning on playing a female elf anyways... Hmmm... Might give Solas a little run...

[Ryzaki]

Loghain, Alistair and the Warden all appear on Maury to make a DNA test and see who's the real baby daddy.

 

Not Steve Wilkos? aww we won't get any deadbeat dad yelling

[Nimlowyn]

I agree with this. To me, much of this comes down to the question: "Why shouldn't women and LGBTQIA players be allowed the same luxury of playing self-insert characters (a phrase that I do not use as a pejorative) as straight male gamers?" I don't play self-insert characters all that often, but I refuse to accept a lecture from someone admonishing me to be a better role-player in order to accommodate a lack of options, because that's what I did for years, before companies deigned to acknowledge my presence. I already know all about role-playing, thanks.

As someone who does play self insert characters, after years of playing (wonderful!) games where it was impossible for me to self insert, I think this post is: 

[Melca36]

.....wut?

 

My brother posted something back in ME3 days of BSN on why he preferered Cortex/mShep.    He explained why he Kaidan/mShep did not sit well with him.  The gay fans respected his opinion and understood why he felt the way he did.    The Straight Female fans who shipped Kaidan/mshep bashed him and thought he was crazy for not liking them.   He actually quit posting soon afterwards but is part of a smaller private community.

 

That experience was not a pleasant one for him and it made him have big issues with straight fans who go overboard with their m/m fandom.

[CuriousArtemis]

I want to chime in on this ongoing discussion, but I’m not sure what to say or how to say it. It’s also been an emotionally difficult time for me. I’ve been a massive DA fan since playing DA2 in 2011. Mr. Laidlaw’s first post in this thread really broke my heart, but that’s not his or BioWare’s fault, of course.

 

Spoiler

I’m so grateful for playable races returning, I will say that much. Playing as a male elf is so fulfilling for me. I am a non-gender identifying person (and that’s as personal as I’ll get here on the public BSN) and the androgyny of the male elf just “fits” me and when given the option in an RPG that is the race/sex I choose.

 

I prefer to play males in general in games; as an equally disappointed friend told me recently, “I’ve been in this female body for 40 years of my life; I want to be someone else when I game.” To be honest, I think there are a lot of people who feel this way; sex and gender are just so restrictive in our current society, and well that’s the beauty of RPGs.

 

So in real life I like guys… “androsexual” is my preferred term Games like Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Skyrim, and Dragon’s Dogma are really special to me because they allow me to play as I want and romance who I want. Mass Effect and Dragon Age 2 are probably the least “fulfilling” for me because I’m forced to play a pretty masculine guy in those games, but it’s still more comfortable than playing as a woman. (Actually just yesterday I started a new ME playthrough and went with a FemShep for the first time; I turned it off midway through Eden Prime. I just did not feel remotely engaged with the game and did not identify with the main character.)

 

I’ve been looking forward to DAI since before it was DAI, I guess around mid-2012. I wanted to romance Cullen because I was a massive fan of his character arc after playing both DAO and DA2. He was also a knight, a very noble guy, and I felt cheated that I couldn’t romance Alistair, who is a similar type, even though both characters are very different in terms of personality, narrative goals, etc. Since all DA2 LI had been bi, I assumed "DA3" would be the same.

 

So I was quite literally heartbroken when he was announced as straight. I had to be away from the forum for a few days because it really, really hurt to see others talking about how they would be able to romance him. I don’t begrudge my friends their happiness, but it does feel very unfair. (It feels that way; I’m not saying it empirically is unfair.) Like an idiot, I started hoping for Blackwall… another noble, masculine, knightly guy; maybe I would get lucky this time. I didn’t. More crying. (More wanting to punch myself in the face for crying over a video game…)

 

My options are two men I don’t find attractive; that would be okay, honestly, if the two men I did actually find attractive weren’t available to the other gender. (And when I say “attractive’ I don’t mean, “Oh god I’m so horny I want to bang them” etc. but it is the sort of relationship that I want but can’t have in real life, if that makes sense.) It is Alistair all over again. It isn’t anyone’s fault, really, that I don’t find Dorian or Iron Bull attractive. That’s on me. A lot of gay men find Dorian quite attractive, so in a way, I guess, he would be considered a success? His design is a bold choice; it’s going to either attract someone or repel them. It is maybe verging on a stereotype, which makes me uncomfortable, but I haven’t seen any guys complaining about that (and sometimes things are stereotypes for a  reason.)

 

The Iron Bull is pretty grizzled looking, which, to be honest, I quite like (you may be picking up that I like pretty masculine guys, which interestingly does not gel too well with my personal relationship history, lol!), but his personality is the “loveable rogue” type. So we have the flamboyant mustachioed gay man and the roguish “I’ll sleep with anyone” bisexual (or pan) man.

 

This is too long, I’m sorry. I don’t know how to articulate my thoughts because I don’t want to upset or hurt anyone, but I am really saddened and have lost my enthusiasm for the game, and I want to communicate this somehow. BioWare: you make good games, but you’re special because you write great characters, and yes, great romances. I have played a lot of great games, fun games, difficult games, games that I poured 100s of hours into or games that required me to strategize or react quickly. But only BioWare makes BioWare games, and that’s why I love them. And that’s why I’m so heartbroken, I guess.

 

The next Halo could announce there’ll be no more swords and it’s not going to bring tears to my eyes. It just doesn’t work like that.

 

Seriously, this was only supposed to be like three paragraphs max. Sigh.

 

Some ideas I hope might be incorporated for next time around: thinking outside the box in terms of character sexuality and appearance/personality (make a male knight gay, make a princess lesbian, etc.) and don't play with people's hearts by releasing the romance information in bits and pieces. Don't make fun of people for feeling elation or heartbroken over an aspect of the game you might personality consider important. It's your fault for being so good at what you do

 

And to everyone else: Please don't tell disappointed/heartbroken people to just "play the other gender." It may work that way for you, but it doesn't for everyone. 

[Winged Silver]

Why not? It is a sequel to that game. Thinking it will follow suit is a very rational thing to do. 

Only thing though is DA2 got enough flak (I personally loved it) from the player base that assuming too much would be borrowed from it was sketchy at best. 

[Ryzaki]

My brother posted something back in ME3 days of BSN on why he preferered Cortex/mShep.    He explained why he Kaidan/mShep did not sit well with him.  The gay fans respected his opinion and understood why he felt the way he did.    The Straight Female fans who shipped Kaidan/mshep bashed him and thought he was crazy for not liking them.   He actually quit posting soon afterwards but is part of a smaller private community.

 

That experience was not a pleasant one for him and it made him have big issues with straight fans who go overboard with their m/m fandom.

 

That's probably more female shippers though. >_> they're frightening. The HHR vs HG wars. Good lord. *shudders*

 

Edit: Really REALLY hoping that crap doesn't happen in Inquisition. It didn't really happen in DAO and DA2 though so I'm optimistic.

[Not a Cat Doll]

Hello everyone. Please help keep this thread on topic by discussing Dragon Age Inquisition. If you want to discuss other games please move to their respective threads.

[Melca36]

That's probably more female shippers though. >_> they're frightening. The HHR vs HG wars. Good lord. *shudders*

 

Edit: Really REALLY hoping that crap doesn't happen in Inquisition. It didn't really happen in DAO and DA2 though so I'm optimistic.

 

Yeah thats true. The Mass Effect fandom is different from the Dragon Age fandom.   It probably won't even happen during Inquisition.

[Lee80]

I want to chime in on this ongoing discussion, but I’m not sure what to say or how to say it. It’s also been an emotionally difficult time for me. I’ve been a massive DA fan since playing DA2 in 2011. Mr. Laidlaw’s first post in this thread really broke my heart, but that’s not his or BioWare’s fault, of course.

 

Spoiler

I’m so grateful for playable races returning, I will say that much. Playing as a male elf is so fulfilling for me. I am a non-gender identifying person (and that’s as personal as I’ll get here on the public BSN) and the androgyny of the male elf just “fits” me and when given the option in an RPG that is the race/sex I choose.

 

I prefer to play males in general in games; as an equally disappointed friend told me recently, “I’ve been in this female body for 40 years of my life; I want to be someone else when I game.” To be honest, I think there are a lot of people who feel this way; sex and gender are just so restrictive in our current society, and well that’s the beauty of RPGs.

 

So in real life I like guys… “androsexual” is my preferred term Games like Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Skyrim, and Dragon’s Dogma are really special to me because they allow me to play as I want and romance who I want. Mass Effect and Dragon Age 2 are probably the least “fulfilling” for me because I’m forced to play a pretty masculine guy in those games, but it’s still more comfortable than playing as a woman. (Actually just yesterday I started a new ME playthrough and went with a FemShep for the first time; I turned it off midway through Eden Prime. I just did not feel remotely engaged with the game and did not identify with the main character.)

 

I’ve been looking forward to DAI since before it was DAI, I guess around mid-2012. I wanted to romance Cullen because I was a massive fan of his character arc after playing both DAO and DA2. He was also a knight, a very noble guy, and I felt cheated that I couldn’t romance Alistair, who is a similar type, even though both characters are very different in terms of personality, narrative goals, etc. Since all DA2 LI had been bi, I assumed "DA3" would be the same.

 

So I was quite literally heartbroken when he was announced as straight. I had to be away from the forum for a few days because it really, really hurt to see others talking about how they would be able to romance him. I don’t begrudge my friends their happiness, but it does feel very unfair. (It feels that way; I’m not saying it empirically is unfair.) Like an idiot, I started hoping for Blackwall… another noble, masculine, knightly guy; maybe I would get lucky this time. I didn’t. More crying. (More wanting to punch myself in the face for crying over a video game…)

 

My options are two men I don’t find attractive; that would be okay, honestly, if the two men I did actually find attractive weren’t available to the other gender. (And when I say “attractive’ I don’t mean, “Oh god I’m so horny I want to bang them” etc. but it is the sort of relationship that I want but can’t have in real life, if that makes sense.) It is Alistair all over again. It isn’t anyone’s fault, really, that I don’t find Dorian or Iron Bull attractive. That’s on me. A lot of gay men find Dorian quite attractive, so in a way, I guess, he would be considered a success? His design is a bold choice; it’s going to either attract someone or repel them. It is maybe verging on a stereotype, which makes me uncomfortable, but I haven’t seen any guys complaining about that (and sometimes things are stereotypes for a  reason.)

 

The Iron Bull is pretty grizzled looking, which, to be honest, I quite like (you may be picking up that I like pretty masculine guys, which interestingly does not gel too well with my personal relationship history, lol!), but his personality is the “loveable rogue” type. So we have the flamboyant mustachioed gay man and the roguish “I’ll sleep with anyone” bisexual (or pan) man.

 

This is too long, I’m sorry. I don’t know how to articulate my thoughts because I don’t want to upset or hurt anyone, but I am really saddened and have lost my enthusiasm for the game, and I want to communicate this somehow. BioWare: you make good games, but you’re special because you write great characters, and yes, great romances. I have played a lot of great games, fun games, difficult games, games that I poured 100s of hours into or games that required me to strategize or react quickly. But only BioWare makes BioWare games, and that’s why I love them. And that’s why I’m so heartbroken, I guess.

 

The next Halo could announce there’ll be no more swords and it’s not going to bring tears to my eyes. It just doesn’t work like that.

 

Seriously, this was only supposed to be like three paragraphs max. Sigh.

 

Some ideas I hope might be incorporated for next time around: thinking outside the box in terms of character sexuality and appearance/personality (make a male knight gay, make a princess lesbian, etc.) and don't play with people's hearts by releasing the romance information in bits and pieces. Don't make fun of people for feeling elation or heartbroken over an aspect of the game you might personality consider important. It's your fault for being so good at what you do

 

And to everyone else: Please don't tell disappointed/heartbroken people to just "play the other gender." It may work that way for you, but it doesn't for everyone. 

I was with your spoiler'ed story till you started calling Dorian stereotypical and flamboyant.  Then I just really couldn't read anymore.  Dorian isn't either of those things based on the information we have been given thus far.  You should really give him the benefit of the doubt before you label him (quite honestly incorrectly).   Though it seems you already made up your mind, so carry on I suppose. 

[Cheech 2.0]

Well after reading through fifty pages or so on this thread I'll say it was never boring. Lot's of opinions, lot's of anger. I'm glad people actually talk about these issues at least it is a start. We have to become more tolerant and accepting cause not one of us is the same, we all bring a little something different to this life. I don't know how to change things, I just know they need changing. Being able to discuss these topics is a step in the right direction, let's hope many more will follow. Peace lovers of video games, and be good to each other.

[CuriousArtemis]

I was with your spoiler'ed story till you started calling Dorian stereotypical and flamboyant.  Then I just really couldn't read anymore.  Dorian isn't either of those things based on the information we have been given thus far.  You should really give him the benefit of the doubt before you label him (quite honestly incorrectly).   Though it seems you already made up your mind, so carry on I suppose. 

 

It's just my impression... I was hesitant to write that because I afraid it would give offense; usually when that happens you should listen to your gut feeling  I may also be influenced by all the Dorian fanart... I see fanart where he's fainting or flailing his hands about... it's very Jack from Will and Grace, or Jack from Three's Company "pretending" to be gay. It feels offensive. (Both those characters, in my opinion, are offensive, though Jack on Will and Grace less so because there are other gay men on the show, allowing for diversity.) Yes, there are definitely guys like that, and that's awesome; they should be them, but whenever a gay man is portrayed in the media, 90% of the time they portray him as "that" gay guy. So seeing Dorian looking like and possibly acting like "that guy" makes me uncomfortable. 

 

As for the mustache, well, there was an entire episode of the Simpsons where Homer joined a parade and thought it was "The Mustache Parade." It wasn't, and that was the joke, if you catch my drift.

 

You're right; we haven't really met him yet, so I hope my impressions are wrong. He's written by DG so he's going to be a great character, no matter what. Will I be attracted to him, at present, no, I'm not. But we'll see what happens. 

[LiaraShepard]

snip

 

I'm actually quite glad that he isn't overly masculine. We already have Iron Bull who's full of testosterone. So it's good that the second guy balances things out. But I think it's just a matter of opinion.

[devSin]

It's just my impression... I was hesitant to write that because I afraid it would give offense; usually when that happens you should listen to your gut feeling  I may also be influenced by all the Dorian fanart... I see fanart where he's fainting or flailing his hands about... it's very Jack from Will and Grace, or Jack from Three's Company "pretending" to be gay. It feels offensive. (Both those characters, in my opinion, are offensive, though Jack on Will and Grace less so because there are other gay men on the show, allowing for diversity.) Yes, there are definitely guys like that, and that's awesome; they should be them, but whenever a gay man is portrayed in the media, 90% of the time they portray him as "that" gay guy. So seeing Dorian looking like and possibly acting like "that guy" makes me uncomfortable.

Dorian hasn't officially been portrayed that way, at all, so I'm not sure why you jump to such a conclusion and then proceed to dismiss him.

Honestly, if you had said he didn't seem as masculine as you'd prefer, it would have been perfectly understandable (you're just looking for a different kind of guy); but when you labeled him flamboyant and started questioning whether his design is successful ("in a way") because his target audience seems to like him (whereas you don't), then I think it did get a bit offensive, yes.
 

As for the mustache, well, there was an entire episode of the Simpsons where Homer joined a parade and thought it was "The Mustache Parade." It wasn't, and that was the joke, if you catch my drift.

This is an instance where you can simply say you don't like the mustache.

It doesn't make him gay; it doesn't make him effeminate. It's just something you don't like (and that's fine).

As somebody who doesn't particularly like facial hair, I hated all of Dorian's concepts but think he actually turned out all right in the game (from what we've seen so far).

Anyway, I wish you had been able to romance one of the companions you were really interested in; if you decide Dorian and the Iron Bull truly aren't for you, I hope you at least find the friendship content with Blackwall and Cullen to be rewarding. It sucks to find something you're interested in, only to later find out that it isn't meant for you.

[daveliam]

I'm actually quite glad that he isn't overly masculine. We already have Iron Bull who's full of testosterone. So it's good that the second guy balances things out. But I think it's just a matter of opinion.

 

And it's even nicer that they didn't feel the need to make up for Iron Bull's hyper-masculinity by having Dorian be an extreme example on the other end.  He doesn't seem terribly feminine, but he's also not hyper-masculine.  I like that.  (Of course, I also like Iron Bull's hyper-masculinity). 

 

Interesting that none of the m/m options have been feminine.  I personally am fine with that since I tend to prefer more masculine guys, but I do wonder if there are some players who like feminine men and would like to see that represented in future options. 

[PrinceLionheart]

Kind of sucks that Male Inquisitors have less romance options.

[CuriousArtemis]

I'm actually quite glad that he isn't overly masculine. We already have Iron Bull who's full of testosterone. So it's good that the second guy balances things out. But I think it's just a matter of opinion.

 

Absolutely! The writers and artists can only do so much. Either you're lucky and you got your "type" ... or you're unlucky, and you get to watch the other side coo and squeal over getting your type. I just got reeeeeally unlucky this time... (again).

[CuriousArtemis]

Honestly, if you had said he didn't seem as masculine as you'd prefer, it would have been perfectly understandable (you're just looking for a different kind of guy); but when you labeled him flamboyant and started questioning whether his design is successful ("in a way") because his target audience seems to like him (whereas you don't), then I think it did get a bit offensive, yes.

 

I'm sorry I offended you It isn't just that I'm not attracted to Dorian... I'm not attracted to Zevran or Fenris, either, but I loved their romances. Neither of those guys is really super masculine.

 

I definitely don't think he's "gross." And I definitely don't equate "gay" with "gross." I hope he's not a stereotype, not because I find a stereotypically gay guy gross or unattractive, but because I find it offensive. EDIT (Especially when Mr. Gay Stereotype is the only representative of gay guys in that game/series/movie/whatever.)

[CuriousArtemis]

Interesting that none of the m/m options have been feminine.  I personally am fine with that since I tend to prefer more masculine guys, but I do wonder if there are some players who like feminine men and would like to see that represented in future options. 

 

I think there would have to be 25 available love interests for everyone to get the guy or girl of their dreams lol Hello Skyrim!

[Sylvianus]

I want to chime in on this ongoing discussion, but I’m not sure what to say or how to say it. It’s also been an emotionally difficult time for me. I’ve been a massive DA fan since playing DA2 in 2011. Mr. Laidlaw’s first post in this thread really broke my heart, but that’s not his or BioWare’s fault, of course.

 

Spoiler

I’m so grateful for playable races returning, I will say that much. Playing as a male elf is so fulfilling for me. I am a non-gender identifying person (and that’s as personal as I’ll get here on the public BSN) and the androgyny of the male elf just “fits” me and when given the option in an RPG that is the race/sex I choose.

 

I prefer to play males in general in games; as an equally disappointed friend told me recently, “I’ve been in this female body for 40 years of my life; I want to be someone else when I game.” To be honest, I think there are a lot of people who feel this way; sex and gender are just so restrictive in our current society, and well that’s the beauty of RPGs.

 

So in real life I like guys… “androsexual” is my preferred term Games like Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Skyrim, and Dragon’s Dogma are really special to me because they allow me to play as I want and romance who I want. Mass Effect and Dragon Age 2 are probably the least “fulfilling” for me because I’m forced to play a pretty masculine guy in those games, but it’s still more comfortable than playing as a woman. (Actually just yesterday I started a new ME playthrough and went with a FemShep for the first time; I turned it off midway through Eden Prime. I just did not feel remotely engaged with the game and did not identify with the main character.)

 

I’ve been looking forward to DAI since before it was DAI, I guess around mid-2012. I wanted to romance Cullen because I was a massive fan of his character arc after playing both DAO and DA2. He was also a knight, a very noble guy, and I felt cheated that I couldn’t romance Alistair, who is a similar type, even though both characters are very different in terms of personality, narrative goals, etc. Since all DA2 LI had been bi, I assumed "DA3" would be the same.

 

So I was quite literally heartbroken when he was announced as straight. I had to be away from the forum for a few days because it really, really hurt to see others talking about how they would be able to romance him. I don’t begrudge my friends their happiness, but it does feel very unfair. (It feels that way; I’m not saying it empirically is unfair.) Like an idiot, I started hoping for Blackwall… another noble, masculine, knightly guy; maybe I would get lucky this time. I didn’t. More crying. (More wanting to punch myself in the face for crying over a video game…)

 

My options are two men I don’t find attractive; that would be okay, honestly, if the two men I did actually find attractive weren’t available to the other gender. (And when I say “attractive’ I don’t mean, “Oh god I’m so horny I want to bang them” etc. but it is the sort of relationship that I want but can’t have in real life, if that makes sense.) It is Alistair all over again. It isn’t anyone’s fault, really, that I don’t find Dorian or Iron Bull attractive. That’s on me. A lot of gay men find Dorian quite attractive, so in a way, I guess, he would be considered a success? His design is a bold choice; it’s going to either attract someone or repel them. It is maybe verging on a stereotype, which makes me uncomfortable, but I haven’t seen any guys complaining about that (and sometimes things are stereotypes for a  reason.)

 

The Iron Bull is pretty grizzled looking, which, to be honest, I quite like (you may be picking up that I like pretty masculine guys, which interestingly does not gel too well with my personal relationship history, lol!), but his personality is the “loveable rogue” type. So we have the flamboyant mustachioed gay man and the roguish “I’ll sleep with anyone” bisexual (or pan) man.

 

This is too long, I’m sorry. I don’t know how to articulate my thoughts because I don’t want to upset or hurt anyone, but I am really saddened and have lost my enthusiasm for the game, and I want to communicate this somehow. BioWare: you make good games, but you’re special because you write great characters, and yes, great romances. I have played a lot of great games, fun games, difficult games, games that I poured 100s of hours into or games that required me to strategize or react quickly. But only BioWare makes BioWare games, and that’s why I love them. And that’s why I’m so heartbroken, I guess.

 

The next Halo could announce there’ll be no more swords and it’s not going to bring tears to my eyes. It just doesn’t work like that.

 

Seriously, this was only supposed to be like three paragraphs max. Sigh.

 

Some ideas I hope might be incorporated for next time around: thinking outside the box in terms of character sexuality and appearance/personality (make a male knight gay, make a princess lesbian, etc.) and don't play with people's hearts by releasing the romance information in bits and pieces. Don't make fun of people for feeling elation or heartbroken over an aspect of the game you might personality consider important. It's your fault for being so good at what you do

 

And to everyone else: Please don't tell disappointed/heartbroken people to just "play the other gender." It may work that way for you, but it doesn't for everyone. 

 

Liked your post because I felt sorry for you.

 

I hope you'll still be able to enjoy the game and the romance options once you play the game. 

 

* hug *

[PrinceLionheart]

well to be honest, i have some kink with gay couples,though im far away from being straight,call me weird if u like:) though im not finding them attractive just because they are gay, but because they are handsome) still never heard of so called slash shippers bashing f/f or f/m fans  quite the contrary,like with me3 a lot of fans of female shepard with kaidan were very annoyed with people who shipped a male shepard with him

 

I see that happen more in Anime Fandoms, but then again the group who does it tends to be teenaged girls.

[SofaJockey]

Although DAI is not a dating simulator it does capture some things from real life:

• Not everyone you take a shine to will fancy you in return.
• Not everyone you hope is a certain sexuality will turn out to so.

Funny how demanding we can be that 'x' will romance our Inquisitor 

 

We really have no more right to expect a particular romance as we are to expect a particular foe, quest or plot outcome.

[Nimlowyn]

I want to chime in on this ongoing discussion, but I’m not sure what to say or how to say it. It’s also been an emotionally difficult time for me. I’ve been a massive DA fan since playing DA2 in 2011. Mr. Laidlaw’s first post in this thread really broke my heart, but that’s not his or BioWare’s fault, of course.

 

Spoiler

I’m so grateful for playable races returning, I will say that much. Playing as a male elf is so fulfilling for me. I am a non-gender identifying person (and that’s as personal as I’ll get here on the public BSN) and the androgyny of the male elf just “fits” me and when given the option in an RPG that is the race/sex I choose.

 

I prefer to play males in general in games; as an equally disappointed friend told me recently, “I’ve been in this female body for 40 years of my life; I want to be someone else when I game.” To be honest, I think there are a lot of people who feel this way; sex and gender are just so restrictive in our current society, and well that’s the beauty of RPGs.

 

So in real life I like guys… “androsexual” is my preferred term Games like Dragon Age, Mass Effect, Skyrim, and Dragon’s Dogma are really special to me because they allow me to play as I want and romance who I want. Mass Effect and Dragon Age 2 are probably the least “fulfilling” for me because I’m forced to play a pretty masculine guy in those games, but it’s still more comfortable than playing as a woman. (Actually just yesterday I started a new ME playthrough and went with a FemShep for the first time; I turned it off midway through Eden Prime. I just did not feel remotely engaged with the game and did not identify with the main character.)

 

I’ve been looking forward to DAI since before it was DAI, I guess around mid-2012. I wanted to romance Cullen because I was a massive fan of his character arc after playing both DAO and DA2. He was also a knight, a very noble guy, and I felt cheated that I couldn’t romance Alistair, who is a similar type, even though both characters are very different in terms of personality, narrative goals, etc. Since all DA2 LI had been bi, I assumed "DA3" would be the same.

 

So I was quite literally heartbroken when he was announced as straight. I had to be away from the forum for a few days because it really, really hurt to see others talking about how they would be able to romance him. I don’t begrudge my friends their happiness, but it does feel very unfair. (It feels that way; I’m not saying it empirically is unfair.) Like an idiot, I started hoping for Blackwall… another noble, masculine, knightly guy; maybe I would get lucky this time. I didn’t. More crying. (More wanting to punch myself in the face for crying over a video game…)

 

My options are two men I don’t find attractive; that would be okay, honestly, if the two men I did actually find attractive weren’t available to the other gender. (And when I say “attractive’ I don’t mean, “Oh god I’m so horny I want to bang them” etc. but it is the sort of relationship that I want but can’t have in real life, if that makes sense.) It is Alistair all over again. It isn’t anyone’s fault, really, that I don’t find Dorian or Iron Bull attractive. That’s on me. A lot of gay men find Dorian quite attractive, so in a way, I guess, he would be considered a success? His design is a bold choice; it’s going to either attract someone or repel them. It is maybe verging on a stereotype, which makes me uncomfortable, but I haven’t seen any guys complaining about that (and sometimes things are stereotypes for a  reason.)

 

The Iron Bull is pretty grizzled looking, which, to be honest, I quite like (you may be picking up that I like pretty masculine guys, which interestingly does not gel too well with my personal relationship history, lol!), but his personality is the “loveable rogue” type. So we have the flamboyant mustachioed gay man and the roguish “I’ll sleep with anyone” bisexual (or pan) man.

 

This is too long, I’m sorry. I don’t know how to articulate my thoughts because I don’t want to upset or hurt anyone, but I am really saddened and have lost my enthusiasm for the game, and I want to communicate this somehow. BioWare: you make good games, but you’re special because you write great characters, and yes, great romances. I have played a lot of great games, fun games, difficult games, games that I poured 100s of hours into or games that required me to strategize or react quickly. But only BioWare makes BioWare games, and that’s why I love them. And that’s why I’m so heartbroken, I guess.

 

The next Halo could announce there’ll be no more swords and it’s not going to bring tears to my eyes. It just doesn’t work like that.

 

Seriously, this was only supposed to be like three paragraphs max. Sigh.

 

Some ideas I hope might be incorporated for next time around: thinking outside the box in terms of character sexuality and appearance/personality (make a male knight gay, make a princess lesbian, etc.) and don't play with people's hearts by releasing the romance information in bits and pieces. Don't make fun of people for feeling elation or heartbroken over an aspect of the game you might personality consider important. It's your fault for being so good at what you do

 

And to everyone else: Please don't tell disappointed/heartbroken people to just "play the other gender." It may work that way for you, but it doesn't for everyone. 

I liked this post because, despite your severe disappointment, you have a healthy dose of self insight and don't blame the developers. Respect. 

[CuriousArtemis]

Liked your post because I felt sorry for you.

 

I hope you'll still be able to enjoy the game and the romance options once you play the game. 

 

* hug *

 

D'aww, thanks I think the disappointment lessens over time. I wish I hadn't gotten so into this fandom in the first place! I kind of wish I'd never discovered DA2 (first BW game) at all, but in retrospective, it helped me realize some pretty major things about myself, which is cool, I guess. 

[CuriousArtemis]

I liked this post because, despite your severe disappointment, you have a healthy dose of self insight and don't blame the developers. Respect. 

 

Well I could probably sit alone in a room and think deeply about my thoughts then write a twenty page essay on them, no problem. Benefits of being an introvert

 

God, I would never blame the developers. David Gaider is my hero.