The Highever Alienage and how the Elves are treated is something to definitely examine. Most of what the dialogue seems to talk about is more how the common folk feel towards the Elves, rather then anything about the Couslands themselves (Iona being the exception). Nan's dialogue is definitely something you wouldn't want to hear your boss say, but I don't think she intends to follow through with it. The two elves call her a miserable old bat within earshot, which if being severely punished by being beaten/whatever was in the cards wouldn't be something they'd do (until they were away from her at least).
So I think it's partially a result of just them having a very vicious dynamic together.
Nelaros is the apprentice to a blacksmith whom, as it turns out upon inspecting the wedding ring item, happens to be his father. You hear tell of how it's a very successful business and you also hear from Soris that Nelaros is a savage fighter, which seems to indicate experience with weaponry, though smithing doesn't just include weapons. Contrast to the Denerim alienage which had a ban on Elves bearing weapons following the riots and even before that it wasn't something that was particularly looked upon favorably, to say nothing of how Elves can't even get decent jobs like that.
The codex from the hahren of the Highever alienage (whose date of origin is never given) doesn't make mention of anything occurring in Highever itself, though it implies such by what it mentions. But it also shows the problems with the Elves themselves for how they treat those who do well for themselves. A family makes a good break and the Alienage Elves disown them for leaving and seemingly "giving up", only to welcome them back when their holdings are burned down by looters. In that regard, the City Elves and the Dalish Elves aren't very different. Both are willing to disown other Elves for a difference in lifestyle choices.
Also, in regards to the Mabari Hound, the option exists for the HN to say that he knows better to hurt anyone. As some people tend to take the presence of an option to suggest the Elves be beaten as evidence of the Couslands being awful towards Elves, that seems to indicate that the Elves could've gotten the Hound out if they had tried to.
Not that I blame them for the fear they had, mind you. Just that if they had attempted it, I'd reckon they would've been successful.





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