Thanks for the response Wulfsten. For brevity's sake, I removed most of it, but that was considered and respectful, and it helps me understand better where you are coming from.
I will give you Bioshock and Dragon Age. Frankly I thought the Mass Effect 3 promotion argument was a bit of stretch. I'll not go so far as to call it tabloid journalism, but in the context of trying to build a larger argument, a couple of games were unfairly singled out. Obviously, I don't think Dragon Age is misogynistic in the whole, but again, I like when I am occasionally forced to question how I feel about something.
It sounds like you disagree fundamentally on what is fair game in the art world. That is OK, and helps frame our points of view. I do believe that in taking on certain subjects writers and artists have a responsibility to say something that moves the conversation forward. I don't need the villains to be cartoonish, but I do think the bar is raised for the writing/art work and its impact on society. That can be hard to quantify, I know, but there are some works that are obviously presenting serious issues for puerile reasons. Its why most horror films don't work for me. FWIW God of War is generally too cynical and brutal in its presentation for my liking. I quit halfway through the first game when it asked my avatar to murder someone in cold-blood in order to advance (if I remember right, it was a guy I was asked to kill). Anita's argument is a feminist argument, which makes sense on a channel called Feminist Frequency. I'd say there are other topics worth talking about with video game worlds too. Its still a young medium, which in many ways has only recently found those elements that make it unique from other works. There are bound to be some growing pains.
To keep this brief, what I'm hoping comes of all this is a little middle ground. Obviously developers are not going to turn tail and start producing Mario Party knock-offs or princess revenge fantasies. But maybe, just maybe we can produce more Children of Light and fewer Gods of War on a given year. Perhaps the occasional fantasy or sci-fi epic can skip the obligatory brothel/strip club area. Instead, perhaps more writing energy can be dedicated to realistic romantic and sexual relationships that grow over time and do not objectify either party (not unlike what Bioware tries to do, and has improved upon over the course of the last few games). A few more women like Lighting and Laura Croft (the recent iteration) could grace our game covers. And while I don't agree with everything Anita says, she's raised some valid points. I'm glad we are having the conversation; I think there's a right way for each of us to engage each other as we have it, like we are doing now.
Thanks for having that conversation with me.
Nice response, thruaglassdarkly, it’s refreshing to actually be able to expand on some of this issues without feeling besieged by assumptions and bitterness!
I think we do disagree fundamentally on an artist’s responsibility. I think I’m happy for artists to experiment with whatever topics, themes, and issues they want to without feeling like they need to justify their use of a certain issue, even if it is sensitive or politically incorrect. Ideally, we would then judge the art on its merits, and the good stuff, which may well “move the issue forward”, as you phrased it, would rise to the top. But I can also see an argument for a more responsible, if limiting, socially conscious way of viewing art.
I agree on God of War, but I don’t think that Anita approaching the issue from a feminist framework helps her argument. A feminist framework is still concerned with the specific role gender plays in social constructions and politics, and if anything, God of War was spectacularly gender-neutral in some senses – everyone got their skulls bashed in by Kratos, man, woman or god. To be sure, there are elements of God of War’s aesthetic which merit serious feminist discussion, like the hypersexualisation of females and the hypermasculinisation of males, and what that looks like, but we were talking specifically about women being singled out for violence, and specifically sexual violence. I haven’t seen much evidence that GoW was guilty of that.
Just because Anita is approaching with a feminist lens does not justify an argument that anything bad happening to a woman in a video game is happening to that woman BECAUSE she is a woman. And this is only a slight oversimplification of her argument – she literally shows clips that are decontextualized instances of a woman being attacked, hurt, or killed, as evidence that the game as a whole features misogynistic violence.
I agree that games should absolutely mature and become more nuanced in how they tell stories and approach issues of social relevance. Personally, I think gaming is still in its infancy, and most narratives in video games are childish and embarrassingly crude. There are some exceptions – Gone Home is one of my favourite works of art, and the games you named are also excellent. I think gaming is moving in the right direction, and very quickly, too, despite the efforts of mainstream media journalists covering gamergate.
I have to say, I didn't get that from her videos at all. I think her point was that using sexual violence against women flippantly as contextual flavouring and shorthand for 'this character is evil' trivialises it, and reinforces the notions that 1) it is somehow inevitable, and 2) rape is committed by irredeemably evil 'othered' monsters in dark alleys, rather than (former) friends and confidants of the victim.
Thanks for chiming in, Ferretinabun! 
Well, Anita explicitly defines the use of violence against women to convey edginess or darkness in games as being intended to “titillate a presumed straight male audience”. Your version of her argument actually works much better than what she actually says.
Her confused argument ranges back and forth from asserting that women are merely used to provide “edgy” scaffolding for a game world, to claiming that female corpses are used to create a “sexually charged” mood. These are two very, very different claims, and she knowingly blurs the two together, along with decontextualized and disparate video game clips.
The end result is that you have no idea what game she’s actually talking about, or even what her specific criticism is of a specific clip. So you end up thinking that Dragon Age is a misogynist game that tries to titillate its players by depicting sexual violence. Or that Red Dead is all about buying the lives of prostitutes from pimps, despite the fact that both these games prominently feature remarkable, complex and strong female characters who are actually quite desexualised (Flemeth and Wynne, in the former, or Bonnie in the latter).
She would have been much fairer to discuss in depth a specific game, pointing out what her actual problems were with an actual game. Instead, she presents an argument that’s difficult to engage with, because it’s literally all over the place. I believe she does this intentionally, because it’s a technique seen in the arsenals of two-bit corrupt politicians and tabloid journalists.