I rather she to be loyal to her father's legacy and live in reality than to be happy. Neither is better, grey warden path is more realistic specially during the legacy DLC and act 3.
Malcolm didn't seem to even like the Wardens nor agree with their methods, I'm not seeing how joining them is following his legacy. Both paths are realistic, imo. So it doesn't matter what you decide but If you want to say putting her in the circle is unrealistic then I can say that taking her into the deep roads when you already have a mage in the party is unrealistic. What can she contribute that Anders or can't do better? I also think it makes more sense that she would eventually get caught and taken to the Circle before Hawke can make a name for himself in the city.





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