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The PUNquisition thread. (Warning thread may cause groans and head shaking.)


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#826
MrGDL87

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If you enter into a giant fight unarmed then... you must have rocks for brains.

 

An exiled Ferelden noble is... bannished from the realm.

 

What song applies to players who only choose to repeat the Mage path?...

Let's Do The Time Warp Again

 

If the Demolition expert of the Bull's Chargers battled an Arcane demon and someone had screenshots then it would be... The Rocky Horror Picture Show

 

<_<



#827
Orian Tabris

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If you enter into a giant fight unarmed then... you must have rocks for brains.

 

What song applies to players who only choose to repeat the Mage path?...

Let's Do The Time Warp Again

 

If the Demolition expert of the Bull's Chargers battled an Arcane demon and someone had screenshots then it would be... The Rocky Horror Picture Show

 

<_<

 

Fun fact: Caridin's advertisement for convincing dwarves to volunteer to become golems had the song 'We Will Rock You' playing in the background.

 

Non-pun related fun fact below:

Spoiler


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#828
MrGDL87

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What is a common gymnastic move performed by the dwarves?...

 

A cartawheel

 

<_<


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#829
Orian Tabris

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I made this one a few weeks back after a frustrating night in The Hinterlands and threw it up in the DQ.  Figured I might as well share it with the forum at large.

 

bear_hafters_woods.jpg

 

"Look human, I Hafter do this. I owe the Carta some money, and this grizzly job is the only one whose employers are willing to bear having an employee like me. I don't like it anymore than you do."


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#830
MrGDL87

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Some mage behavioural patterns:

 

Mages with the Winter's Grasp ability try to get their enemies ice-solated.

Fire mages aren't very punctual some can be heard saying "Immolate".

Storm mages try shocking their opponents beforehand and if they win they're always ecstatic.

Spirit mages are usually drunk and on the lookout for places to drink. If a place is found, they will let others know by saying "Look, I've got a bar-rier" 

 

<_<



#831
MrGDL87

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Duke Prosper was a Haineous individual.

His wyvern pet was getting on in years because it was Leopold.

 

What is a popular game show in Orlais?

Caprice Is Right

 

When inquisitors can't be bothered to do anything, they have a Solas-y attitude.

 

If we ever see the 'Corypheus entering the Golden City' scene, some people may be disappointed because at the end it fades to black.

 

The item 'Heart Of The Many' is an example of a Tallisman.

 

<_<


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#832
Gilli

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This pun sadly only works in German. 

 

Anders ist anders als andere Magier.  (Anders is different than other mages.)


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#833
Gilli

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Was passiert wenn ein Virtuoso lag hat? (What happens to a Virtuoso who has lag?)

 

Er ZITHER!t rum. (He shivers around)

 

Spoiler


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#834
Gilli

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Why does Solas never attend one of Josie's parties?

 

Cause it's not his cup of tea.


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#835
MrGDL87

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What does Vivienne say when she's surprised?...

"Oh, dear!"

 

Creating Qunari darkspawn is ogre-rated.

 

Some enemies on the Exalted Plains regurgutate food.

 

Meredith gave orders after dusk because... she was the night commander.

 

When inquisitors return to the same spot to gather herbs, they tell their companions: "I'm sure I've been her-bivore"

 

<_< 



#836
MrGDL87

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What happens at the end of the Winter Palace quest with a romanced Iron Bull?...

The Iron Bull turns to the inquisitor and asks: "Can I have a Kadance?"

 

What type of dancing does Iron Bull prefer?...

The fox trot (or Bully dancing)

 

I was going to play some multiplayer today as a reaver but I decided to wait until Tamar-row.

 

If you are searching for the alchemist multiplayer character in Skyhold, you just need to Luka round the stable area.

 

<_<



#837
MrGDL87

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The Chantry is an example of a Drakonian organisation.

 

When Solas goes bowling in the fade, he tries to get a veilstrike.

 

Have you ever rode a horse after dark?...

It's a night-mare.

 

<_<


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#838
Wargrim

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Iron Bull and Sera are behind on the Lavellan.

 

What did the darkspawn ogre say after he killed you?

"Its all ogre now"


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#839
MrGDL87

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Where do impressive dwarves come from?...

 

Awesome-mmar

 

<_<


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#840
MrGDL87

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What type of Darkspawn apologises for everything?...

Emissorry

 

Descent DLC pun:

 

Spoiler

 

<_<



#841
MrGDL87

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Where would Josephine take her sick pets?...

To Yvette

 

How do you sedate a mage?...

By using a tranquilizer

 

What would you call a reality show which features a Dwarven Inquisitor's family?...

The Cadashians

 

What is a rogue inquisitor's favourite rock band?...

Back Stabbath

 

<_< 


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#842
MrGDL87

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How does an Italian Iron Bull say "Goodbye"?...

Arreaverdeci

 

How can you describe an Iron Bull/Dorian relationship?...

A-dor-a-bull

 

Josephine likes to see things through to the end because... she attended finishing school

 

What is a well known dwarven fairytale?...  

Hansel & Cretahl

 

<_<



#843
MrGDL87

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What type of firework is popular in Ferelden?...

Ser Cauthrien Wheel.

 

Tallis is used to working in chilly weather because she has experience of Salit-y conditions.

Spoiler

 

After the events of Trespasser, what is a popular dance craze among the Ben Hassrath?...

The Viddasalsa

 

Did you hear about the wrestling match between Bull and an elf darkspawn?...

It was a classic Iron Shriek match.

 

How do the Qunari travel down rivers?...

They use Qunoes.

 

I can't sleep in the Frostback Basin because... the Hakkonites are too cold.

 

<_< 



#844
d1ta

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Oww my face.. XD sore from too much laughing and grinning XD
This thread has depleted my like quotas twice over XD

I'll take a shot:

What did Inquisitor Lavellan say to the Exalted Plain clan Keeper?
- "Hawen we met before?"

XD that's the best I can do XD
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#845
d1ta

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Solas abjects Sera's idea of not inviting Cole to the party, because it wont be fun without Spirits
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#846
d1ta

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What type of Darkspawn apologises for everything?...
Emissorry


Aww.., don't be sorry, you can't always wynne all the time :(
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#847
paramitch

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What's Bull's favorite song?

 

"Qun River."

 

What's Solas's favorite movie?

 

"The Dread Wolf of Wall Street."

 

What position would Cassandra play in Quidditch?

 

Seeker.

 

What's Dorian's favorite holiday carol?

 

"Walking in Tevinter Wonderland"

 

What's Sera's favorite holiday carol?

 

"Silent Shite"

 

What do you call Chantry priests with dreadlocks?

 

Andrastefarrians

 

What kind of face cream does Celene use?

 

Oil of Orlais

 

Why does Bull always have good cell service?

 

He never leaves home without his Chargers.

 

What's Rainier's favorite song?

 

"Back in Blackwall"

 

What's Bull's favorite play?

 

"Waiting for Katoh."

 

 

<So, so, sorry... runs away...>


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#848
d1ta

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^
You actually made me sing Qun River XD !!

--

You know Xenon the antiquarian is a marine life enthusiast.
He needs 2 sea urchins everyday
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#849
MrGDL87

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What do the writers say when you try to get more information about titans?...

"That's indescent!"

 

Why did Anders take in Ser Pounce-A-Lot?...

He had a good feline.

 

Blackwall prefers rainier days when travelling.

 

Trespasser DLC pun:

Spoiler

 

What type of card game does the Guardian of the Sacred Ashes play?...

Bridge

 

Never trust a Tevinter ruler's painter... because they're Archon artist.

 

<_<



#850
DarkAmaranth1966

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Spoiler

 

What happened to our Knight Captain? He left the order before Lucias started Cull-en us.


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