1942 réponses à ce sujet

[cindercatz]

I think the process of behavioral progression might be similar to baseline or might not depending on each individual relationship, but the distinction is really what's driving the behavior in the person's mind and body. It's almost the inverse of how a lot of people are expected to think and feel. Then it can effect relationships accordingly, if there's not a level of understanding and acceptance there, and effect general socialization. I think that's the difference, or the most succinct way I can put it.

[Vanth]

I also think that people are confusing people being polite with them being demisexual. Many of us regard it as rude to hit on everyone we are attracted to.

 

In Master Cheif's case, did we really expect him to start slavering in lust over when he first sees Cortana? Really? He is a professional.

 

To be honest, this is part of my issue with the DA:I romances. They are highly unprofessional relationships between people in leadership and subordinate positions. 

[Hanako Ikezawa]

I also think that people are confusing people being polite with them being demisexual. Many of us regard it as rude to hit on everyone we are attracted to.

 

In Master Cheif's case, did we really expect him to start slavering in lust over when he first sees Cortana? Really? He is a professional.

 

To be honest, this is part of my issue with the DA:I romances. They are highly unprofessional relationships between people in leadership and subordinate positions. 

I can assure you I am not confusing the two. I can see what you mean, and agree people don't have to start slavering or anything like that, but the scene places us in John's mind and he has no reaction to it. This is after the scene where Cortana explains why she chose her appearance to Dr. Halsey. So I don't think it's just him being polite, though I'm sure that is part of it as well. 

[Seraphim24]

What's with the invention of pronouns these days? Call me insensitive, but Demisexuality to me just sounds like how normal relationships work: you meet someone, talk to them, become friends, form an emotional connection, think of them as more than friends, sometimes they reciprocate and so on.

 

Ehhh I think the "normal relationship" is more like a person masturbates online to a bunch of stuff, meet's someone, goes and masturbates again online to a bunch of random stuff, talks some more, talks to some other people, then eventually goes into a deeper relationship with the one person, before deciding they don't know what they're doing, maybe have sex with some other random person, then suddenly having sex with the other person before attempting to make it exclusive, failing.. then maybe succeeding and staying with that person for awhile. I mean, the basic trajectory is basically getting to know someone and forming a deeper attraction but I'd hardly call it the same thing. Or maybe they have a single relationship with just one person, but which is really just for the sex and not really for any particular emotional or deep connection, or a bazillion permutations or a bazillion kinds of sexual activity (oral sex, etc) and arrangements in between here and there. Of course, some people are so frosty they probably wouldn't experience sexual attraction to person even if they had a deep connection.

 

The idea that there are people out there which could not achieve sexual attraction without having talked extensively/gotten to know them etc I would consider to be extremely rare in this equation.

 

I'm not saying everyone is a closest nymphomaniac (or virginal either for that matter), but I don't think anyone has ever really nailed down or even attempted (outside of like the Kinsey study) to determine what "normal" is in the context of sexuality and relationships, suffice to say I do not for one second buy the notion that most (whatever is being called "normal") relationships resemble what is being described as demisexuality.

[Hanako Ikezawa]

The fact that people have adopted the term and use it to define themselves validates it as a part of our lexicon, regardless of it being coined by a 15 year old.

If you want to get nit-picky about made up words, go after portmanteaus like "ginormous."  Smushing words together is just lazy.  

One I always like is the term kindness. Calling someone kind nowadays is saying they are compassionate, have empathy, etc. It originally was an insult, as calling someone kind was calling them naive or foolish. 

 

The origin of a word doesn't matter, just what society decides it represents. 

[RINNZ]

Master Chief as Demi? Um...I don't know how to actually respond to that.

[Andraste_Reborn]

One I always like is the term kindness. Calling someone kind nowadays is saying they are compassionate, have empathy, etc. It originally was an insult, as calling someone kind was calling them naive or foolish. 

 

My favourite example is 'wan'. Not often you see a word go from meaning black to meaning white ... (Well, almost. The original Old English word wann meant dark, leaden or grey. It migrated to a slightly different spelling and the other sense of colourless over several centuries.)

 

Anyway, the point being: yes, indeed, all words are made up, and they change over time. (No matter how much the mutation of 'literally' annoys me ...)

[o Ventus]

What's with the invention of pronouns these days? Call me insensitive, but Demisexuality to me just sounds like how normal relationships work: you meet someone, talk to them, become friends, form an emotional connection, think of them as more than friends, sometimes they reciprocate and so on.

That isn't nearly needlessly complex and convoluted enough. Why restrict yourself to "normal, healthy human being" when you can be a panromantic demisexual?

[turuzzusapatuttu]

 

Okay, here is the first character in media that through consuming all the information in the series leads me to think is demisexual. I will explain why in two parts: only developing feelings after forming a strong emotional bond and not showing primary sexual attraction. I decided to go with this one first since I figure everyone at least knows who he is so would be easier to talk about. The first video game character I think of when I think demisexual video game characters is Master Chief Petty Officer Spartan John-117.

 

 

First, I'll talk about how John only develops feelings towards people who he has developed strong emotional bonds with. Throughout the lore and history of the universe, Spartans have been shown to still develop feelings and sexual attraction and desires. For example one Spartan II retired from service so she could marry and have a family with a man she fell in love with. There are also cases where Spartans have slept around on shore leave with people they don't even know apart from their appearance. Spartans have also been attracted to other Spartan's appearances. While John has developed deep friendships with some of his fellow Spartans, John has only ever experienced an attraction to two people: fellow Spartan II Linda-058(whom ironically I also suspect is demisexual) and the AI Cortana.

 

With Linda, this occurred due to them being the best of the Spartan IIs, with John even admitting Linda is probably the best Spartan, thus being put on the same team and sent on missions together. While not as easily seen as with Cortana, during these missions you can tell that he sees Linda as more than a good friend like he does with the other Spartans in Blue Team, including those whom were part of his training team so has known for years longer so should have a deeper connection to them but doesn't. He has also shown to care for her by some of his actions. For example when one of his friends died, he was sad but carried on with the mission. However when Linda was seriously hurt John goes against orders, something he almost never does, to drag her to safety, begging her not to die as he put her in cryosleep to save her until she could receive medical attention. 

 

With Cortana, this is seen visually and heard audibly instead of just read due to Cortana being a main character in the games. As the series progresses, we see and hear John's feelings for Cortana change. In the first game, which is soon after they first met, the relationship is purely professional. In the second game, they are still mostly professional but you can see an emotional connection starting to form. The third game takes that further by them being more personal than professional with each other. Finally in the fourth game is where you see his emotional connection to her form an attraction to her, caring more for her well-being than one would expect from a mere friend, especially considering she is a machine. This comes to a head during Cortana's final moments, where you can hear the pain in John's voice and almost literally see his heart break as Cortana dies. This is a man whose entire life has seen nothing but war and death, and yet the only other time he reacts this way is when he thought he was going to lose Linda. As a comparison, we can look back at Halo 3 when one of John's close friends Sargeant Major Johnson dies. He is sad by the loss, but not nearly to the extent he is in the other examples. 

 

The second reason is his lack of primary sexual attraction, since this sets him apart from being someone who prefers to have an emotional connection before exploring these feelings. As we all know, Cortana took the visage of the silhouetted body of a naked woman. The reason she took this form is explained as most people would react to the attractiveness of her physical appearance, even for a fraction of a second. For an AI, that fraction of a second would be plenty of time to give her the upper hand in the conversation or whatever was going to happen. And yet when she and John first meet, he doesn't react at all to her appearance. He sees her, and continues like it was nothing. 

 

 

[Seraphim24]

That isn't nearly needlessly complex and convoluted enough. Why restrict yourself to "normal, healthy human being" when you can be a panromantic demisexual?

 

Again though, I really doubt "normal" people look at porn and go eh, maybe later, I'm just not interested. Why get excited by this sex and sexual activity when I could be at a park having a picnic with someone who's personality I really like and want to get to know intimately through a connection?

 

98% of people are horn muffins (not judging), it seems to the me vast and overwhelming majority of people are either A) having lots of sex or generally engaging in lots of sexual activity, or maybe just masturbating a ton B ) not having lots of sex or sexual activity because they are undesirable but would if they could or just get away with fantasies or something C) not having lots of sex (or sexual activity) because they are afraid of societal judgment (often produced by people in category B, quite honestly); and which could change later.

 

Maybe those 98% of people basically find someone, get to know them, settle down, etc, same as the other 2% that are in whichever other category, but the inner gears and cogs and wheels that produce these results are different it seems to me.

[AWTEW]

Again though, I really doubt "normal" people look at porn and go eh, maybe later, I'm just not interested. Why get excited by this sex and sexual activity when I could be at a park having a picnic with someone who's personality I really like and want to get to know intimately through a connection?

 

98% of people are horn muffins (not judging), it seems to the me vast and overwhelming majority of people are either A) having lots of sex or generally engaging in lots of sexual activity, or maybe just masturbating a ton B ) not having lots of sex or sexual activity because they are undesirable but would if they could or just get away with fantasies or something C) not having lots of sex (or sexual activity) because they are afraid of societal judgment (often produced by people in category B, quite honestly); and which could change later.

 

Maybe those 98% of people basically find someone, get to know them, settle down, etc, same as the other 2% that are in whichever other category, but the inner gears and cogs and wheels that produce these results are different it seems to me.

 

Nice to know humanities on the decline, spending all that time sexing..

[TheRatPack55]

Again though, I really doubt "normal" people look at porn and go eh, maybe later, I'm just not interested. Why get excited by this sex and sexual activity when I could be at a park having a picnic with someone who's personality I really like and want to get to know intimately through a connection?

 

98% of people are horn muffins (not judging), it seems to the me vast and overwhelming majority of people are either A) having lots of sex or generally engaging in lots of sexual activity, or maybe just masturbating a ton B ) not having lots of sex or sexual activity because they are undesirable but would if they could or just get away with fantasies or something C) not having lots of sex (or sexual activity) because they are afraid of societal judgment (often produced by people in category B, quite honestly); and which could change later.

 

Maybe those 98% of people basically find someone, get to know them, settle down, etc, same as the other 2% that are in whichever other category, but the inner gears and cogs and wheels that produce these results are different it seems to me.

 

 

_{Holey milf of puberty, Fapman...}

[Dubya75]

Bioware turning into a sex game franchise, I see...or that seems to be what some sad, lonely people wants from it.

[Andraste_Reborn]

Bioware turning into a sex game franchise, I see...or that seems to be what some sad, lonely people wants from it.

 

Wouldn't including demisexuality make it less of a sex game, though?

[Vanth]

Again though, I really doubt "normal" people look at porn and go eh, maybe later, I'm just not interested. Why get excited by this sex and sexual activity when I could be at a park having a picnic with someone who's personality I really like and want to get to know intimately through a connection?

 

98% of people are horn muffins (not judging), 

 

I think you may be projecting your own desires onto other people. I am sure there are plenty people (a large proportion) who are not interested in porn at all. Personally, I am not really interested in sex, and if I am honest only indulge because it is expected of me (ie. societal pressure, so sort of the opposite of your category B.)

[Dubya75]

Wouldn't including demisexuality make it less of a sex game, though?

 

No, because it will only serve to perpetuate this obsession people have with sexuality in Bioware games.

 

The only way to solve this IMO, is to COMPLETELY scrap any sexual relationships from future Dragon Age games in particular. It is getting way out of hand.

[Innsmouth Dweller]

i'd love bioware games to include a representation of people who don't think about sex at all and masturbate only in new year's eve to fluffy cat pictures, but are dog people. there is no name for that group yet but don't you dare mock them because you'll only show your ignorance and something-gyny

 

but seriously... 98% of people are horn muffins? dear maker, i haven't thought about sex until i saw this post. i must change my ways to fit the rest of the world, i suppose.

[turuzzusapatuttu]

i'd love bioware games to include a representation of people who don't think about sex at all and masturbate only in new year's eve to fluffy cat pictures, but are dog people. there is no name for that group yet but don't you dare mock them because you'll only show your ignorance and something-gyny

 

but seriously... 98% of people are horn muffins? dear maker, i haven't thought about sex until i saw this post. i must change my ways to fit the rest of the world, i suppose.

 

All the BSN is about sex.

 

Just think about it and you'll realize it's true.

[Hanako Ikezawa]

Again though, I really doubt "normal" people look at porn and go eh, maybe later, I'm just not interested. Why get excited by this sex and sexual activity when I could be at a park having a picnic with someone who's personality I really like and want to get to know intimately through a connection?

 

98% of people are horn muffins (not judging), it seems to the me vast and overwhelming majority of people are either A) having lots of sex or generally engaging in lots of sexual activity, or maybe just masturbating a ton B ) not having lots of sex or sexual activity because they are undesirable but would if they could or just get away with fantasies or something C) not having lots of sex (or sexual activity) because they are afraid of societal judgment (often produced by people in category B, quite honestly); and which could change later.

 

Maybe those 98% of people basically find someone, get to know them, settle down, etc, same as the other 2% that are in whichever other category, but the inner gears and cogs and wheels that produce these results are different it seems to me.

That's taking it to an extreme, don't you think? Most of the people on the planet do not have nymphomaniac tendencies. Like everything else in this subject, humanity is spread over a large spectrum. 

[o Ventus]

Again though, I really doubt "normal" people look at porn and go eh, maybe later, I'm just not interested. Why get excited by this sex and sexual activity when I could be at a park having a picnic with someone who's personality I really like and want to get to know intimately through a connection?

 

98% of people are horn muffins (not judging), it seems to the me vast and overwhelming majority of people are either A) having lots of sex or generally engaging in lots of sexual activity, or maybe just masturbating a ton B ) not having lots of sex or sexual activity because they are undesirable but would if they could or just get away with fantasies or something C) not having lots of sex (or sexual activity) because they are afraid of societal judgment (often produced by people in category B, quite honestly); and which could change later.

 

Maybe those 98% of people basically find someone, get to know them, settle down, etc, same as the other 2% that are in whichever other category, but the inner gears and cogs and wheels that produce these results are different it seems to me.

 

I love it when people try to summarize human behavior, and get it entirely wrong. Like, how are you a member of the same species when you're way off base?

[otis0310]

I do not believe it is logically possible to make such a charatcer, mainly because of what the Bioware guy said.  Merrill could be interpeted as demisexual, for one.  And that is the problem, that the character will probably be interpreted differently.

 

So the question is how are you going to write something like this?  If it was a book you could get into the person's thoughts and know what they are thinking, here that is not possible.  The thing is just because they never expressed any sexual attraction before getting close does not mean they never felt it.  They could have been hiding from their true feelings, playing hard to get, or just thought the other person wasn't interested.  There are a whole number of reasons why they might have never expressed their feelings besides being demisexual.

 

So the question is how could the average viewer differentiate them enough to know they are demisexual, as a opposed to simply hiding their feelings?

 

If you can write a conversation where one could tell the difference I would like to hear it.  But I dont think that you, or anyone can, unless it was done in an overtly ham fisted way like Krem was (in my opinion).

 

 

 

Disclaimer:

 

Please note that I have no problem with trans people or characters, I do not care if the character is straight/bi/gay/trans/demi or purple as long as he is well written and fits the narrative.  But Krem felt to me like he was forced into the story like a square peg in a round hole just to appease a minority, and it is this square peg and round hole that bothers me, not the minority.

 

However this is not the place to discuss Krem, I just wanted to add that in before I got 1001 hate replies.

[DomeWing333]

Okay so this is a bit out of nowhere, but I just came across this study on asexuality and found it a bit baffling. Maybe some of the members here who are more familiar with asexuality/demisexuality can help me out.

 

Basically, the results of the study were that self-described asexual women don't differ significantly from normals in their physiological and self-reported arousal responses to erotic stimuli, but only in their self-reported positive affect, self-reported feelings of sexual attraction, and self-reported autonomic response following viewing erotic material.

 

So...what gives? I can get how sexual arousal might be distinct from affect (you can find something arousing but not feel good about it), but how can sexual arousal can be seen as distinct from sexual attraction? How can someone find sexual arousal when viewing erotic materials involving parties they have no sexual attraction towards? That doesn't make any sense to me.

[o Ventus]

^ That is why I don't put any stock into studies that derive their data from self-reporting. There's no way to ensure that the results are "real". If they wanted to do it legitimately, they should gather a number of people who claim to be asexual and do a series of brain scans before, during, and after showing them sexual content and get a read from the brain waves.

[Elfyoth]

You mean these?

Isnt that Morrigan in a way? I mean not 100% But what you wrote, the dialouge is preey much Morrigan in DAO. No I am not saying she is demisexuality, I am saying that dialouge reminded me of her  

 

 

At any rate, I wouldnt mind demisexuality in bioware games. 

[DomeWing333]

^ That is why I don't put any stock into studies that derive their data from self-reporting. There's no way to ensure that the results are "real". If they wanted to do it legitimately, they should gather a number of people who claim to be asexual and do a series of brain scans before, during, and after showing them sexual content and get a read from the brain waves.

Heh, with the precision required to get good brain scans, that'd be pretty difficult to pull off. I know from experience that people in regular fMRI studies have enough trouble keeping still as it is without being shown an hour of Skinemax while they're in there.