The thing I don't enjoy is how extremely binary the decisions and outcomes end up being. It only takes a single moment where you decide to take the more brutal choice for Leliana to go completely psycho. Doesn't matter how much you keep pushing her to reign in the cray, any single moment where you make that hard decision is all the excuse she needs to go completely ruthless. That sort of restriction just feels stupid.
There are very good reasons to kill the traitor at the beginning of the game. HE'S A TRAITOR. He's killed one of our own, and he's a huge threat to the fledging Inquisition. That doesn't mean you don't care. That doesn't mean that killing people is the best solution all the time. That doesn't mean that under different circumstances things would be different.
But no matter how much you push Leliana to understand this, she still chooses to go full crazy at the end.
It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't so extreme. After all I like Leliana to be a little ruthless. This isn't some chantry bake sale we're running here, this is the full on Inquisition. We have a lot of power and as such we have a lot of enemies, especially towards the end of the game when you do Leliana's quest. People will eat us alive if we're too soft. We need a spymaster who can make these ruthless decisions if we need to. Let's face it, that's part of what made Leliana so effective. But you can still be willing to look at other less brutal options when the opportunity arises. That's not even in the same ballpark as the deep end crazy ruthlessness where they take Leliana at the end, all for daring to suggest that maybe killing an enemy who has proven they're wiling to kill us is maybe not a bad thing.
A bit more middle ground would have been nice.
This. So much this. This Leliana "softening" thing is like an AND. If you made 1 1 1 decisions (soften her everytime) or 0 0 0 decisions (encourage her hardened side every time) you're probably happy with the outcome you get. Otherwise the writing and character of Leliana very likely comes off as a bunch of nonsense.
You have a choice at the beginning of the game when things aren't quite established yet that invalidates further choices down the line (leading you on, thinking you're making a difference but you actually aren't) and as countless people before me described, that key particular choice has plenty of underlying circumstances that alter the player's judgement or encourage him to withdraw from making a clear standpoint (not to mention the player might intentionally want to roleplay a person who has no opinion on the matter yet at all, which is what the "say nothing" response implies. After all, it's early in the game and we're in the middle of a big **** hitting the fan). There is a difference between a proven traitor and a spy. There is a difference between a person who is proven to be dangerous and a person who might be dangerous. That's one side of the problem.
Leliana is like a sinking ship. If you don't do absolutely everything in your power to babysit her into not sinking, she is going to sink. Which, mind you, can be by itself fine, as argued before. She has a history that justifies this situation. Problem is, by the time of the sinking, she now has a more developed relationship with the player character -now the leader of the organization she's a part of-, thus making the PC in part responsible for her actions. Since the writing and number of options fails here, your roleplayed player character turns into an inconsistent hypocrite who's apparently very okay with having a crazy, rogue, murdering, child-kidnapping Princess Stabbity instead of a reliable spymaster. You can't get rid of her! If she's going to dwell on a choice/non-choice the player character made/haven't made 40 gameplay hours ago; at the beginning of the game, when the player character is just barely not considered a fatal threat to the world (at least by some NPC's) and has absolutely no authority over her; so much as to ignore everything else that happens after and just act royally stupid, there should be an option to confront her. Tell her she's crossing the line and it has to stop. Kick her out if needed.
When my paragonish goody-two-shoes character ends up with a second Corypheus as his spymaster despite clearly trying to do the opposite on several occasions and there's not even the option to say something that matters anymore, it really tips me off something is wrong.
What's funny is that the game tries to babysit us by having the traitor dialogue choices have a yellow glow and saying they're important. It fails to mention that you're potentially committing to this choice for the rest of the game, indeed it would be worthwhile to mention that on a beginning-of-the-game choice that even alters the epilogue of the story and that has it's first consequence surface much, much further in the game.