I did exactly what you did my first playthrough. Human male rouge, had solas, varric and cassandra with me. Solas has a lot of lines here too that explore lore, but I think he also impacts the elf bad ass too.
You need to do the ritual. That is a major bonus. I also think it's what allows you even the chance to talk the guy into not fighting. Solas was a choice to speak to the guy down, and he managed it. I also think I had the ability to use the 'ancient lore' knowledge perk I got to talk him down. You know you're at a stand still with the guy when he gives you a guide for a secret path that skips a lot of the fighting, goes through a few areas that have a great amount of codex things on the wall and some ok loot to boot.
When it comes to the well, I think you just have to say i'm warry of the damages it could do, but destroying it is not the way. Solas said some things as well, then the bad ass just walked away peacefully.