The only downsides of the Qun is that it demands all to be a part of it, demands the death of anyone resisting and chains mages, although the last one may be considered good or bad. The Qun would've been... convincing if the society simply exiles than hunting the deserters and forcing it's way of life on the unwilling. Imagine if all the Qunari considered it only a privilege to live under it. But for some it's not a privilege but a curse or bad luck to be born there.
I like the Qun's philosophies. Providing a place for everyone without any class system. It also carries a sub-section of meritocracy. Like you can be the Arishok even if your role is to be a soldier. As an Arishok, you're not being removed from your role, just that more is added to it. There is also the fact that the higher your position is in the Qun, the greater the demands are for you to satisfy. The soldiers are at your service sure, but the moment you defy the Qun, they are longer under you.
People typically hate the Qun because it denies individual freedom. They call it slavery, I find that weird. You are given a role and treated just as well as anyone else. You are protected, fed, given clothing and shelter. All that is asked in return is for you to do your job. You are at no one's mercy. It's no different than obeying the rules of the country you live in. Sure, you can choose which ever job you wish to do outside the Qun but that is a risk you take. Due to that you can be cheated, exploited, removed as a nuisance etc. Of course you could also prosper on your own but you'd still see beggars and the homeless, the hungry and the unattended.
The Qun is not perfect but that's not the problem. It has the glaring flaws like the use of Qamek, hunting Tal-Vashoth and forcefully converting others. Maybe that is why people can't take it seriously enough or just spit at it. Gaider should've made it more convincing. While I respect how the Qunari strive for the greater good of their people, I wish they didn't believe that everyone had to be a part of it whether they like it or not. Is it not enough for you to strive with as many as you have?
In any case, it's a nice idea. Humans could learn something from that. Too bad it wasn't implemented well enough and resulted in the Qunari being painted almost as slavers.
Given that the Chant itself has its very own directive of forcible conversion and showed clearly that it can't well tolerate non-believer populations itself - the purge of the Qunari population in Rivain comes to mind - the Qun hardly is the only one with that attitude.
In a less religious sense, the hegemonic ambitions of Orlais and Tevinter can be considered as well when it comes to imposing the, in their view, superior culture and empire of theirs on other lands.
That aside, when it comes to control of magic users, which certainly is a general issue within the setting, the Qunari method is the most thorough one, no doubt about it.
Nonetheless, I find the banter Gatt has with Vivienne quite interesting, where he states that he finds her remark that Circles should be reinstated 'quite responsible', if memory serves. He may not be a figure of authority within the Qun, yet the respect for a mage he expresses with this is noteworthy. I have yet to see how this plays out with a mage PC.
Otherwise, I am mostly in agreement.
Mary Kirby said that women under the Qun are forced to have children, even if they don't want to.
Enough said, I think.
As well as men.
On the flip-side, the actual upbringing of children is taken care of by the Tamassrans. Whether that itself is good or bad depends on one's views on institutional communal upbringing.
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