376 réponses à ce sujet

[Colonelkillabee]

Yeah, but they are Orlesian dudes. 

Indeed, LOL. Poor Cullen. Poor poor Cullen.

 

First guy to grab my ass would get laid out, one punch. Hope he has good self control.

[Colonelkillabee]

snip

Problem with this logic is someone could be in a bad mood one day and say that their threshold was breached by something that is usually normal. Then, you're fucked.

 

Touching and so on should always be considered an inappropriate thing to do at the office. Better make damn sure the person you're playing with is someone you really know and that won't bone you later, ruining your reputation and life.

[Char]

Indeed, LOL. Poor Cullen. Poor poor Cullen.
 
First guy to grab my ass would get laid out, one punch. Hope he has good self control.

The latest person to grab mine was my partner's sister. Now -that- was an interesting situation to respond to

[Colonelkillabee]

Problem with this logic is someone could be in a bad mood one day and say that their threshold was breached by something that is usually normal. Then, you're fucked.

 

Touching and so on should always be considered an inappropriate thing to do at the office. Better make damn sure the person you're playing with is someone you really know and that won't bone you later, ruining your reputation and life.

 

This has nothing to do with what I think of the topic though. Cullen's a lion, not a pussycat. He'll be alright.

[Colonelkillabee]

The latest person to grab mine was my partner's sister. Now -that- was an interesting situation to respond to

Closest thing to sexual harassment I've had was some girl saying her friend wanted to suck my dick.

 

Then I hear "No I did not!" In a very flamboyant man voice coming from behind in a hallway. Her gay friend, hiding. *Shutter* I just laughed it off though and kept walking. This was highschool.

[Charcoal15]

I found it to be three things 1. A small joke about the cullenites 2. A little thing about whether or not it would still be strongly reacted to if it was a man and not a woman being harassed (because we all know if it was a woman, Josie for example, that feminists would claw at bioware like wild animals) and 3. Just to show how snobby and controlling orlesian nobles are.

[Boomshakalakalakaboom]

Indeed, LOL. Poor Cullen. Poor poor Cullen.

 

First guy to grab my ass would get laid out, one punch. Hope he has good self control.

 

Lol, you sound so sincere. 

 

My point of view is that it was a big ass room. If he really disliked it to the point of where he felt harassed I am sure that he would have removed himself from it all. Cullen is a big boy (well, not really. Have you seen the nude models?), he can take care of himself.  

[Colonelkillabee]

Lol, you sound so sincere. 

 

My point of view is that it was a big ass room. If he really disliked it to the point of where he felt harassed I am sure that he would have removed himself from it all. Cullen is a big boy (well, not really. Have you seen the nude models?), he can take care of himself.  

I didn't really look all that close, lol. Didn't see the full videos, just thumbnails on youtube. Wait, are we talking his lion, or his body mass? LOL.

 

And I am sincere I HATE Orlesians. I can't think of a worse version of hell than that. I imagine he knew he had to fit in, but most guys don't really think of things in the way of "I was sexually harassed", if that makes sense. Not unless you're in jail...

[Char]

Closest thing to sexual harassment I've had was some girl saying her friend wanted to suck my dick.
 
Then I hear "No I did not!" In a very flamboyant man voice coming from behind in a hallway. Her gay friend, hiding. *Shutter* I just laughed it off though and kept walking. This was highschool.

One of the worst things I ever experienced was from a 50-something guy in a bar in Malta. It was a really narrow bar, so I couldn't get round him to get out, and he cornered me in. He essentially told me he was going to buy me a drink, and then I was going to have sex with him. My partners family were two tables away and I looked over at them for help, and they got up and left (thanks, guys!) my partner was up on karaoke and looked over and luckily noticed me frozen up against the bar and pretty much dropped the mike and rescued me. I was 17 and had no idea how to deal with it. Nothing too terrible, but scary all the same. Nowadays I have the confidence to be able to get rid of most people thankfully.

[Colonelkillabee]

One of the worst things I ever experienced was from a 50-something guy in a bar in Malta. It was a really narrow bar, so I couldn't get round him to get out, and he cornered me in. He essentially told me he was going to buy me a drink, and then I was going to have sex with him. My partners family were two tables away and I looked over at them for help, and they got up and left (thanks, guys!) my partner was up on karaoke and looked over and luckily noticed me frozen up against the bar and pretty much dropped the mike and rescued me. I was 17 and had no idea how to deal with it. Nothing too terrible, but scary all the same. Nowadays I have the confidence to be able to get rid of most people thankfully.

The correct answer to this situation is always nut crunch with your foot. Then if he tries assaulting you, everyone will jump on his ass first. Or nut grab. Heh, even I had to go for that once and I'm a dude. Got tackled basically. No skin off my ass, I still win the fight.

 

Of course, people freeze up sometimes. Good thing this happened in a crowded bar and not some alley or something.

[Dean_the_Young]

I admit it squicks me out that a situation that is clearly sexual harassment feels like it's meant to be played for laughs and treated as such by many players, too. The gender of the target of this shitty behavior is meaningless -- it's never funny or harmless or okay. Doesn't matter a whit if it's the biggest, burliest qunari warrior guy or the smallest, most pathetically weak elven girl. Yes, the risk of being physically overpowered is not the same, but Cullen's situation clearly shows that blatant physical violence doesn't even play into it much of the time. Social and peer pressure, being outnumbered, being in a situation you can't leave, being targeted by people with more "social clout" or "status", thinking you can't afford to "make waves" or "cause drama" because that will get you smeared as the problem instead of the people targetting you ... They ignore his discomfort, his deflections, his refusals in a way that just made my insides clench.

 

And when one of them grabs his ass? That's not even harassment anymore, that's assault. What the flaming hell.

 

Yes, it is sexual assault.

Yes, it is played for laughs.

Yes, it was a joke on the Cullenites as well.

Yes, it was probably only put in because the target was male and different gender expectations of western culture.

 

No, I don't think it was out of character for the setting.

No, I don't think expect Thedas to match Western cultural norms or morality.

No, I don't expect Bioware to particularly care.

No, I don't think the writers thought it would be controversial.

[Colonelkillabee]

People are getting slaughtered left, right and centre and you're worried about a butt grab??!!! Dragon Age isn't really the right context for first world problems. You must be trollin'

LISTEN, ************!

 

Sexual harassment is ****** scary, do you understand? It's not something to take lightly. If my inquisitor were here right now, he'd eviscerate your ass for belittling his assault!

 

http://i.imgur.com/EsvcDLj.png

 

Do you see this ****? Corypheus' worst offense to date. He was so desperate to hold my hand that he LIFTED ME OFF MY FEET, while he talked about how powerful he was, even godlike. That's EXACTLY like what the op was talking about here with "social clout" and "status". And then he ganged up on me with a dragon to intimidate me further so I wouldn't do anything! Look at his face! He was terrified!

 

http://i.imgur.com/FgOXwjM.png

 

Maybe next time you should think twice before being so insensitive. I'm off to get a tissue. Poor Cullen. I feel for you, bro.

[Semyaza82]

   I can sort of see OP's point but got to say I didn't really see a problem with it. If it had been a servant or something receiving that kind of treatment that would be one thing, but as military commander of the Inquisition Cullen is a pretty much the social equal (or close enough) of many of the nobles at the ball. Not saying sexual harassment can't happen between peers, just that I didn't get any sense of victimization or pressure. 

   Cullen was annoyed by the whole thing but there was no feeling to me that he was traumatized by it. In real life I've been out with friends and seen them getting repeated hit on by people they aren't interested in - and sometimes it was damn funny. Of course it isn't always, and if it is in any sense threat or it goes on for too long then it becomes something else. But with Cullen I didn't get that feeling. Grabbing someones arse uninvited never ok in real llife, in the context of a foppish Orleasian noble doing it to Cullen at a ball - I found it funny. 

[panda_express12]

I wish fine ladies would flock towards me and grab my ass.

[Korva]

This isn't about "trauma". Something doesn't need to be the Worst Thing Ever to simply be wrong.

 

Again, I have zero objections to this playing out as it does. It's all too realistic. I just dislike the sense that it's supposed to be funny, or that it's okay because "he can take it". Nobody gets to wave away another person's boundaries -- plus, with a guy it carries an undercurrent of "... or he's not a Real Man™".

[umadcommander]

he's a grown man with a backbone he can deal with it

[Colonelkillabee]

Hate to say it, but there is a difference in this between males and females.

 

(Disclaimer: I'm NOT saying that it makes it okay, or that a man shouldn't be bothered.)

 

But look at it like this. A man is objectified all the time, even by the very women saying objectification of women is wrong. We WANT to be objectified. We like women looking at us like pieces of sexual meat. Women cooing over us of all sorts typically is enjoyable. See an old lady pinch a man's ass, it's cute. See an old man do it to a young woman, he's a disgusting creep.

 

Thing is, it's not just others making this hypocrisy ok, but us guys ourselves. Unwanted sexual attention doesn't come with much risks for a guy, because even if we could get raped for instance, which does happen of course, but not very commonly, we're not the ones stuck with the baby, and we can take our genes elsewhere immediately, whereas vice versa, a woman's stuck with a child for 9 months and if she survives the birth only then can try again, with no guarantee the man that raped her would help protect her and the child, or support them after the birth. So naturally even in our ancient times, female objectification came with more risks than male objectification, which we seeked, because we needed to be seen as a worthy mate.

 

Bringing this back to this situation, it's okay to have a little fun with the hypocrisy of taking this "harassment" lightly, because men and women AREN'T the same, and we all secretly know it. If Cullen truly didn't like the attention, enough that he felt so bad about it, dude would just leave.

 

I guarantee the majority of guys do not think about harassment as others do, because it's not usually harassment to us.

[Semyaza82]

This isn't about "trauma". Something doesn't need to be the Worst Thing Ever to simply be wrong.

 

Again, I have zero objections to this playing out as it does. It's all too realistic. I just dislike the sense that it's supposed to be funny, or that it's okay because "he can take it". Nobody gets to wave away another person's boundaries -- plus, with a guy it carries an undercurrent of "... or he's not a Real Man™".

I think this one is really going to come down to interpretation - for me it isn't sexual harassment. Its an annoyance to Cullen not something serious. Does that mean there is nothing wrong with the way the nobles are acting? Course not - but a hell of a lot of comedy comes from people acting like arses

[Solbranthius]

Just because something is questionable in the real world it doesn't mean it can't be explored in a fictional setting. Do we really need to stifle creativity and humour to appease a vocal minority who read far too deeply into anything and everything in their perpetual quest to get offended on behalf of others?

[Master Race]

[teenidle]

I laughed it off during my first play through, but after hearing what Cole says if he's in the party ("Cullen is afraid. They're hunting him, following fear. He shouldn't be here.")...yeah, I feel kind of guilty. 

[MightyZan]

Them asking him to dance and if he was single didn't bother me too much.  The butt grab did though.  It's one thing to flirt with people, and another thing to physically touch someone without them wanting you to.

 

I think I said  "Not cool" pretty loudly to my comp.

[TheLastArchivist]

The harassment bothered me loads, too. Especially the gay noble asking him to dance with him. He makes it clear he doesn't dig men and the guy just dismisses it like it was irrelevant.

 

So, I try not to take it too seriously. Clearly the scene was made to be comical, without ridiculing our circumspect Commander. But still, harassed people felt bothered by it, and rightly so. I was one of them.