I really hate the way they went about hardening/softening Leliana in DAI, and the consequences of it.
I understand choices having impact and consequence, I support that. But the sequence of events in this situation is moronic.
I keep my mouth shut when Leliana orders the traitor-spy killed. Whether I agree or disagree with her decision to kill him is irrelevant; the fact is, I'm not the inquisitor when that conversation takes place. I'm just some shmuck they keep around due to the glowing hand. It is not my place to question Leliana's judgment or tell her how to do her job at this juncture, and she clearly knows more about the situation than I do from listening to ten seconds of it.
I tell Leliana she made a mistake in calling her scouts back. That is objectively true. The scouts have one job; to scout. If they aren't in the field getting me intel, they need to be on their way back from the field bringing me intel, or on their way out to the field to get me intel. Leliana made a legitimate mistake in being overly cautious in this situation, and as Inquisitor, it's my job to hold her to account to it.
Then comes her personal quest. She puts her knife to the sister's throat. I tell her not to kill the sister. She does it anyway.
Because I chose not to tell her how to do her job when it wasn't my place to do so, and because I told her she made a mistake when she made a mistake, she took that to mean "Blatantly and brazenly disobey direct orders given to you by your commanding officer."
And there is nothing you can do about it. You can't physically stop her. You reprimand her or punish her in any way.
This isn't about ruthlessness, or about how the two situations that lead to her hardening or unhardening are completely divorced in every respect from her killing Natalie. This is about blatant disregard for the chain of command and the impotence of the inquisitor to enforce their authority over their own subordinates.
That's what I hate about that situation.
And what I hate more about it is that it is ultimately going to be my canon because it wasn't my inquisitor's place to tell Leliana her business regarding the spy and my inquisitor abjectly believes Leliana made a mistake with the scouts and would absolutely tell her so.