I think there are enough less drama laden ones for girls - at least in Dragon Ages series. I do think that men should get some tragic ones too, though.
I would like to see once, just once a romance for male players where a female character has a dead husband/lover or a living son from another man. It could be an interesting story which leaves a lot of room for content. I doubt they will ever dare to do it though as it will never sell well.
(not being evil to male players, more for science)
I would like to see once, just once a romance for male players where a female character has a dead husband/lover or a living son from another man. It could be an interesting story which leaves a lot of room for content. I doubt they will ever dare to do it though as it will never sell well.
Well, Cassandra mentions her dead boyfriend right after she and the Inquisitor have sex (now that felt uncomfortable!) But it's the only time she mentions him.
I agree, dead wife is such a cliché, I'm sick of seeing that. Fallout New Vegas was probably the only case where I didn't mind the implementation (this game has no romance, though, maybe it helped).
Well, Cassandra mentions her dead boyfriend right after she and the Inquisitor have sex (now that felt uncomfortable!) But it's the only time she mentions him.
I agree, dead wife is such a cliché, I'm sick of seeing that. Fallout New Vegas was probably the only case where I didn't mind the implementation (this game has no romance, though, maybe it helped).
Regalyan the mage from the movie? I thought he wasn't her boyfriend. I mean the farthest they went is peck on the cheek. And it happened like 15-20 years ago....?
I haven't seen Cass romance scene, but if she mentions someone else or in another capacity then I take my statement back. 
FNV was supposed to have romanced but they cut them. 
I thought it was done well as well, even if they kept the romances I would have still liked it. I think it mostly worked due to the game's brutal nature more than anything else. And the fact that Boone was very short in his dialogues, didn't compare or didn't go on about it for the entire game. I remember it was difficult to get that information from him.
is quite evident that the few times a dead lover is mentioned in a relationship with a female LI, the trend ususally is: or her past lover was a terrible person (Isabela's husband, Marjolaine) or if he wasn't it is only mentioned briefly (Jack, Cassandra).
Why is the dead husband/lover thing so reviled? I don't understand it. Is it just upsetting that your LI used to love someone else? Or is there a particular delivery of this background that sucks ?
I've only played all Dragon Age games and ME3 thoroughly (romancing Kaiden which didn't really resonate with me) so I don't know what other romances are like in other games, but in Dragon age, I don't see dead lovers to be any sort of hardship.
Not really a problem, beside the fact that is quite the trend, now, from the time of KotoR.
Carth, Silk Fox, Thane, Zevran... You can count even Jacob, since he implies he had a story with Miranda.
Many are simply tired ot the same archetype, since sometimes with those character the feeling is being a "second choice".
I think there are enough less drama laden ones for girls - at least in Dragon Ages series. I do think that men should get some tragic ones too, though.
Well I disagree with you on the former bit.
I can agree with you on the later though. Spread the tragedy porn around is good enough for me.
Why is the dead husband/lover thing so reviled? I don't understand it. Is it just upsetting that your LI used to love someone else? Or is there a particular delivery of this background that sucks ?
I've only played all Dragon Age games and ME3 thoroughly (romancing Kaiden which didn't really resonate with me) so I don't know what other romances are like in other games, but in Dragon age, I don't see dead lovers to be any sort of hardship.
It's not reviled per se, more like it has got very very old, especially in previous games. Kaidan is fine, he just had a girl he crushed on.
In previous games it was like this:
BGII - Anomen (the only romance for females) constantly speaks of how much you remind him of his sister, literally for several conversations - which is perfectly fine - then she dies and drama ensures.
Kotor1 - Carth keeps telling you about his dead wife which he can't get over - again for several conversations, and he has a living son as well.
Jade Empire - Sky has a dead wife and a dead daughter which he keeps telling you about through the entire game.
ME2 - Thane - dead wife, living son, again several ongoing conversations.
There are other games that other posters mention, but I do not include them because I don't find them as glaring as the aforementioned, more subtle and not very significant.
Basically in all these games your character is nothing more than a healing tool. I don't mind dead lovers, but talking about them through the entire plot can get really frustrating. And this trend continued up until a certain point.
Why is the dead husband/lover thing so reviled? I don't understand it. Is it just upsetting that your LI used to love someone else? Or is there a particular delivery of this background that sucks ?
I've only played all Dragon Age games and ME3 thoroughly (romancing Kaiden which didn't really resonate with me) so I don't know what other romances are like in other games, but in Dragon age, I don't see dead lovers to be any sort of hardship.
Because it usually comes with comparisons and really I don't want to be compared to a dead ex. It's offputting.
But no thankfully the dead ex thing isn't a issue in DA. They're there (Anders, Zevran) but the comparisons are thankfully lacking.
People are NOT asking for all romances to be happy fluff that ends on a sweet note, just pointing out that IF there is a bad or tragic end it is MOST LIKELY going to be a character for females to romance. Likewise for the dead lover thing, but DAI did good in not including that yet again. I mean sure, it's not exactly the most sanitary or safe setting and people will have dead friends and family and loves in their past but Jesus can we stop hearing them whine about it during our romances. The inevitable time when such a background and past would fit a character's story and make sense is now only going to be met with rolled eyes and another notch on the headboard because it was just used too much. What, a character has no other reason to have a personality or internal angst but if his darling was chopped to death - potentially by his very hands? Pft.
Which leads us to this: when you start flooding one set of romances with some inevitable bad or tragic outcome, it has the same effect. Maybe the guys would like their love interests to bring some drama and tragedy to their experience and have been shut out of such a thing because I guess only the romanceable guys can be jerks, cheats, terrorists, or have some hidden past that will break you apart in the end anyway. I personally like well done gritty tragedy and painful drama, but there's only so much you can have of that until you're just over it. And when stats do sort of support how one group has the lion's share of this, the OP has a point in bringing it up.
Why is the dead husband/lover thing so reviled? I don't understand it. Is it just upsetting that your LI used to love someone else? Or is there a particular delivery of this background that sucks ?
I've only played all Dragon Age games and ME3 thoroughly (romancing Kaiden which didn't really resonate with me) so I don't know what other romances are like in other games, but in Dragon age, I don't see dead lovers to be any sort of hardship.
It's a very specific story that was reused several times...the romanceable male character had a wife and a child, the wife died tragically, the child was kidnapped/killed/sent away. Once, it's fine, twice, they're pushing it, but three or four times and I think it's perfectly valid to say that it is a CRAZY coincidence that all these dudes had terrible luck with dead wives and conveniently dislocated children.
Bioware uses this plot way too often I agree, but I don't mind it in general...for older characters who aren't supposed to be in their early 20s, it's reasonable to expect they've had past wives or lovers that didn't work out for whatever reason, or children.... I'm not a male player, but I'd roll a male PC to romance a character like Morrigan, even with her old god child and all.I would like to see once, just once a romance for male players where a female character has a dead husband/lover or a living son from another man. It could be an interesting story which leaves a lot of room for content. I doubt they will ever dare to do it though as it will never sell well.
(not being evil to male players, more for science)
Not really a problem, beside the fact that is quite the trend, now, from the time of KotoR.
Carth, Silk Fox, Thane, Zevran... You can count even Jacob, since he implies he had a story with Miranda.
Many are simply tired ot the same archetype, since sometimes with those character the feeling is being a "second choice".
Thanks for the response.
It just seems illogical to me that these characters wouldn't have had past loves. Especially when the characters are likely in their 30's and 40's. It's much more likely that a person would have had someone they loved in the past. Or is it the "dead" part that is objectionable? Because I can sort of see that. Most people's past loves aren't dead.
It's the whole dead wife that is glorified in death that's my issue.
I don't mind them having had relationships that ended before. Why would I? Most of my characters are the same. Jacob being with Miranda isn't bothersome. Garrus having a past with random turian lady isn't an issue. It's the glorification and comparison that annoys the heck out of me. No one's asking for a bunch of virgins or people who's never had an adult relationship. If they had a past with one of the other companions or characters and they broke up (preferably amicably) that's fine!
Constant comparisons were annoying. And the fact that before we girls got only such romances, but as Ryzaki said these are no longer present in DA which is fine.
Note: I in no way mind ex-lovers, husbands, wives, whatevers. But you don't really go around telling your bf/husband about your previous love all the time and compare them to him do you?
Thanks for the response.
It just seems illogical to me that these characters wouldn't have had past loves. Especially when the characters are likely in their 30's and 40's. It's much more likely that a person would have had someone they loved in the past. Or is it the "dead" part that is objectionable? Because I can sort of see that. Most people's past loves aren't dead.
It's the dead part. Pretty difficult to compete with a ghost, they will be glorified even when they weren't perfect.
The dead past lovers thing is both the comparison to the dead person and the fact it's not just a, "yeh, married for ten years and she died from a fever, I miss her but I've moved on" kind of thing, but somehow ends up being a defining painful terribad thing in their past that they need your magic hoo ha to help them get over. Losing a lover, especially to tragedy, would be hard for anyone. I understand. But there comes a point where if you're crying to your new love about it every other conversation, you probably weren't mature enough to handle the FIRST relationship. Get over it. Please.
Aarin Gend and Valen from NWN and its expansion had the same issue, and while there might be some exaggeration to how much they all cried about it, it was clearly enough that it's one thing you really remember of the different characters. In different games. Over many years. We're done with it, yo.
Note: I in no way mind ex-lovers, husbands, wives, whatevers. But you don't really go around telling your bf/husband about your previous love all the time and compare them to him do you?
Constant comparisons were annoying. And the fact that before we girls got only such romances, but as Ryzaki said these are no longer present in DA which is fine.
Note: I in no way mind ex-lovers, husbands, wives, whatevers. But you don't really go around telling your bf/husband about your previous love all the time and compare them to him do you?
To be fair the original Carth Syndrome was Jaheira. (and she topped it by hitting on you when her husband died in the same game. 
) So the males have gotten it but yeah...
I do like how you can mock Sky about if if you're CF and he rolls with it. Another reason I only do Sky's romance as CF.
Good grief! Who and in what game does that? I need to know so that I might avoid it! That's icky.
You're safe 
It happened before, not anymore thankfully, the trend is improving.
To be fair the original Carth Syndrome was Jaheira. (and she topped it by hitting on you when her husband died in the same game.
Now that I think of it, that makes Jaheira and Anders alike. I guess there was precedent.
I would like to see once, just once a romance for male players where a female character has a dead husband/lover or a living son from another man. It could be an interesting story which leaves a lot of room for content. I doubt they will ever dare to do it though as it will never sell well.
(not being evil to male players, more for science)
This may not count, but I am going to mention it anyway, for the sake of completeness:
In "Vampire The Masquerade: Redemption", the main character's love interest, Anezka, spends 800 years with another, more powerful vampire while the protagonist is buried under a load of rubble. You can find her diary, stating that she was defiled by her captor, and that she did terrible things to gain his trust, sabotage or delay his plans, undermine the standing of the rest of his entourage, and just stay "alive" on a night-to-night basis. It's not entirely unheard of.
Bioware in general have a thing with re-using the same tropes, but I feel like Dragon Age, at least, demonstrates a clear development in their writing. So no dead wives. Zevran had a dead love he mentioned, but it wasn't nearly as bad as Carth's dead wife and son (not to mention Carth was such a boring character otherwise).
Regalyan the mage from the movie? I thought he wasn't her boyfriend. I mean the farthest they went is peck on the cheek. And it happened like 15-20 years ago....?
She said he was only with two men and he was one of them, so the relationship has clearly progressed further since then. I haven't finished watching "Dawn of the Seeker", though (because it was unwatchably bad), so I dunno what happened in it.
In "Vampire The Masquerade: Redemption", the main character's love interest, Anezka, spends 800 years with another, more powerful vampire while the protagonist is buried under a load of rubble. You can find her diary, stating that she was defiled by her captor, and that she did terrible things to gain his trust, sabotageor delay his plans, undermine the standing of the rest of his entourage, and just stay "alive" on a night-to-night basis. It's not entirely unheard of.
I don't think it could be compared. That game has a pre-defined protagonist, for one, and it's never stated that Anezka has actual feelings for Vukodlak. She's just his ghoul, and in VtM, it means she's connected to him whether she likes it or not.
To be fair the original Carth Syndrome was Jaheira. (and she topped it by hitting on you when her husband died in the same game.
I do like how you can mock Sky about if if you're CF and he rolls with it. Another reason I only do Sky's romance as CF.
Oh yeah, I forgot about Jaheira. That was really creepy tbh, I mean I love her but she is like mama bear to PC, and with her husband.... yeah, I wonder who thought it was a good idea. I still think her and Viconia are among the best written romances though.
You could mock Sky?? I never did, I kind of felt sorry for him and were always nice, but then I was always OP.
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