Krem wasn't born in the Qun. Maybe the 'Aqun-Athlok' thing only applies to later converts.
Besides the roles are not designated by the Tamrassarans at birth, but when they are twelve years old after years of being evaluated.
I found this point very legit. Maybe the word only applies to those converted. Bull didn't say it would count for any Qunari but Krem. Who isn't a born Qunari after all.
I also agree to the former mentioned questions what actually defines male/female, but I also agree, that if it would be as easy as to simply be recognized as Male despite being born to a female body, they perhaps wouldn't have a name for it. Or maybe they would. Their whole system is very bureaucratic, I can perfectly imagine them to have a word for it. But the first option - it to count for those converted, would work for Krem and for the former made notions about the Qun.
Gender simply isn't a that big matter to them, it's secondary, or well, immanent to their society system. You're not socialized as male or female, but in the role that's defined for you. Which is more a matter of biological sex and your talents.
So I totally agree with the statement, that our female heroes of DAO and DA2 don't count in here, or any other FEMALE person, as they act and look female, consider themselves as it. So of course the Qun treats them as female. If someone looks, acts and considers himself as male though, it's perhaps the loophole in the system, when converting into the Qun. Therefor, it has a name.