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[Jackal19851111]

The main quests of the game are done quite well as you can imagine as despite my criticism I've consistently praised the writers/actors/artists and I should also praise the sound and music. It's the gameplay and technical issues that hampen the experience, which unfortunately does affect how you view the writers/actors/artists/composers' work.

[Peregrinus]

The main quests of the game are done quite well as you can imagine as despite my criticism I've consistently praised the writers/actors/artists and I should also praise the sound and music. It's the gameplay and technical issues that hampen the experience, which unfortunately does affect how you view the writers/actors/artists/composers' work.

Yeah, I think that's why all of us are here on the forums more so then in game.  What I've heard of the music is great but always gets cut off by something. The audio stutters pretty much kill the ambient sounds for me because those don't fire either especially after combat.  The technical glitches are what's ruining it for all of us.  The story being told through codex and through conversation is pretty decent overall. 

[Peregrinus]

@Cyan   Don't burn yourself out on writing. Take whatever time you need.  I'm thoroughly enjoying the story so far and can't wait to read more.  I think I'm more excited about coming back here to read then I am in playing the game.

[Peregrinus]

Since you are sharing this wonderful piece of literature with us, I thought I would share a story I wrote when we were into tabletop gaming. The story takes place in an alternate Forgotten Realms universe.  

 

Spoiler

Where in the world is Mr. Muttons?

 

The year 1385, Alban Arthan, the winter solstice.  The tall pines were decorated with red and green ribbons this day as it was every winter solstice. bayberry candles were lit amongst the villages and could be seen dotting the roads. It was a holy day and the harvest had been especially generous this year. All was well in Shadowdale, Home to a one Jayne Laslo.  The laslo family owned one of the larger farms in this community. 100 acres of maize and plentiful fields of grapes, and berries. The laslos very likely supplied majority of the inns along the main road in the Dalelands. Jayne’s father, Robert was proud of his son. Jayne worked diligently in the fields, and took pride in his handiwork, meanwhile training with various men at arms and adventurers who stayed in the Lofty Dragon Inn to find adventure in the many ancient ruins that surrounded the countryside in Shadowdale.  Robert had raised his son with his second wife Angelica, as Mildred his first wife had died shortly after giving birth to Jayne. Jayne’s father had given up his adventuring days over a decade ago, and worked the fields with his now 17 year old son. Angelica was a kind and beautiful woman who treated her two men with care and much love.  Jayne enjoyed the many sword duels with those he trained with, as he imagined in his mind what his father Robert’s adventuring days were like. He was confident the sage had picked him, not only because he was a childhood friend of Vatalonie but because he had gotten quite skilled with the blade. He remembered the days when his father had carved a wooden sword for him on a birthday and the two would spend the day together half playing and half practicing well into the evenings.  “Yar, young seadog,  Dread pirate Robert comes for ye! “ his father would shout in a deep throaty voice. Good memories..

Vatalonie was so serious, so emotional sometimes but always his presence kept her calm.. It was obvious to him there was something.. a spark within her..something different.  There was an undeniable connection between them.. There were not of the same blood but still they were close even though they were complete opposites.  

 

The day finally came when it was time for Jayne and Talon were to travel to the Academia in Arabel. There were fond farewells that day.  Prior to them mounting their horses and heading towards the port, Robert opened an old wooden chest with a crest of two crossed curved swords. Jayne watched as his father removed what looked like sailor’s clothes, an old tattered black cape, a red and black scarf, and then finally a slightly curved sword, it’s hilt a polished steel bound with a bit of leather all the way down to the pommel. “You remind me of when I started adventuring , my son.  Take my old sword and this scarf, may Tymora bring you much luck in your journeys and mostly importantly, much LOOT!”  His father smiled and chuckled. Jayne laughed and hugged him.  He would miss his family...

 

Jayne woke before the sun rose and watched the illumination hit the surface of the ivory tower. He sighed and then started preparation for the morning meal.. a bit of bacon, carefully sliced chunks of venison, added to the meaty broth heated with a pinch of garlic, salt, and chives..

 

This new form it had taken felt out of place and uncomfortable but surprisingly bland. Being Absolutely  anonymous was a necessity so it would have to do for now. The buildings were tall to this new form but his vision, and sense of smell was vastly heightened. The people in the marketplace didn’t notice it at all.  It grinned but it was sure no one actually saw it.  It’s brown and black fur was warm in the sunlight. It’s new master was powerful beyond imagining. One moment, torment in the deepest abyss of the hells and next moment , freed from the clutches of a demon lord who stood over 8 feet tall and had the largest flail in it’s hand. Three vicious looking spiked obsidian colored pieces .

 

A deep black satin hood covered the being’s face and it’s hands wore gloves red as blood. Were those claws at the tips?  Far as Iskkari could tell, it was a man but even with it’s sight, it could not see beyond the hood.. One thing did stand out with this new master.. The sword sheathed at it’s side. Thin, almost like a rapier but it’s hilt flailed out into what formed a jagged crown of sorts.. The metal of it was dull and dark as coal.. Iskkari shrank away  from the blade more so  then it’s owner.. It felt a hollow shrill voice inside it’s mind.. Instructions, concise and lengthy.. Then a flash of darkness, and it stood in what looked to be an alleyway.  The evening air was warm, and flooding with the scent of sustenance.. Delicious aroma of flesh.  It knew it would have to accomplish the tasks given to it, as this new master had placed a geas on it.. To fail would be to die.. But it hungered.. It would need to nourish first.  No One saw it as it tore into the small creature’s flesh. It was a nimble thing but not quick as it. It didn’t satisfy Iskkari’s hunger completely but it would have to do for now.. It did not want to be detected.. It’s form twisted slowly into it’s victim’s shape..  It smiled wickedly.  This body would do well..  It  heard a small child’s voice in the distance... “Mr. Muttons!?  Where are you, kitty? “  “Where in the world are you Mr. Muttons?”  Iskkari meowed and smiled broadly.  He would satiated his hunger soon..

 

[Jackal19851111]

Another writer!

[Peregrinus]

@Cyan Definitely a great place to escape to.   

 

@Jackal  You do me too much credit. I don't think my dabbling can be considering writing.  

[Jackal19851111]

And you do yourself too little credit Peregrinus lol

 

I don't know how you guys can describe the setting so well, I can never do that, like, when I tried, it's all in my head and stays there, and when I proof read my work I go "errr, this makes no sense, where am I?" lol

 

Speaking of Forgotten Realms, I also remember the Dark Elf Trilogy, especially the first book Homeland, god I was so lost in the Underdark reading that book I couldn't put it down. Girlfriend came over wanting attention, nope, have to read the book. Had games to play but nope, was reading the book. Went to the beach for a swim, nope, reading the book getting a tan (and burnt).

[Invisible Man]

well, we have a third writer in our little group. and two are talented, 3 if you include me, I'd never judge the quality of my own work... the surprises never end it seems.

as for da:i, has anyone noticed that there are enemies who's attacks rotate your character about 180o, so that when said attack hits it always hits you from behind? after patch 3, there seem to be more hostiles that do this, at least for me. and my focus bar now seems to be broken, I have master focus, though only one bar seems to fill. *sigh* what is bioware doing to this game?

[Peregrinus]

And you do yourself too little credit Peregrinus lol

 

I don't know how you guys can describe the setting so well, I can never do that, like, when I tried, it's all in my head and stays there, and when I proof read my work I go "errr, this makes no sense, where am I?" lol

 

Speaking of Forgotten Realms, I also remember the Dark Elf Trilogy, especially the first book Homeland, god I was so lost in the Underdark reading that book I couldn't put it down. Girlfriend came over wanting attention, nope, have to read the book. Had games to play but nope, was reading the book. Went to the beach for a swim, nope, reading the book getting a tan (and burnt).

Thanks, Jackal. I think people who write are ultra critical of their own stuff.   Dark Elf Trilogy was great but did you ever read the initial three books that started it?  Crystal Shard, Streams of Silver, and Halfling's Gem.  Definitely check those out.  

[Jackal19851111]

It's not Bioware, it's EA QA hard at work at ruining the game even more while continuing to remain spiteful at paying customers.

[Peregrinus]

well, we have a third writer in our little group. and two are talented, 3 if you include me, I'd never judge the quality of my own work... the surprises never end it seems.

as for da:i, has anyone noticed that there are enemies who's attacks rotate your character about 180o, so that when said attack hits it always hits you from behind? after patch 3, there seem to be more hostiles that do this, at least for me. and my focus bar now seems to be broken, I have master focus, though only one bar seems to fill. *sigh* what is bioware doing to this game?

 

Thanks for the kind words.     I noticed the change also in DAI. I just got into Emprise Du Lion and I was getting slaughtered by the circle strafing. The enemies didn't do that in other areas so something new from whatever they patched?  I have the one perk that raises my focus to 200% and I'm just not seeing it. 

[Jackal19851111]

Thanks, Jackal. I think people who write are ultra critical of their own stuff.   Dark Elf Trilogy was great but did you ever read the initial three books that started it?  Crystal Shard, Streams of Silver, and Halfling's Gem.  Definitely check those out.

 

Haha my GF will kill me if I pull the book card again

 

I get lost in books. And I can take them everywhere, and pull it out anytime unlike my desktop lol

[Peregrinus]

Uploading pictures of my bookshelves. I guess you can immediately tell what my I love from these pictures. Pardon the dust... shoot... where are my cleaning rags? 

Still waiting on your pictures of bookshelves, sir.    

[Peregrinus]

Here's part two of the story. 

 

Spoiler

Tale of Two Kittens

 

Iskkari carefully dragged the small body into the shadowy corner of the alleyway. There were many alleyways like this one in the intertwined streets of the dock ward. It’s night vision saw the sails of many ships off it’s docks. The summer brought merchant and trade ships from all over the realms. All had trade agreements with the massive city. It was as if it existed as a crossroads for all nations. I suppose you could call it a place of amnesty. The City of Waterdeep was split into six distinct sectors, each with it’s own regent.

It licked the blood off it’s mouth slowly savoring the sweet blood of the small child.  The sounds of hundreds of customers at the dock marketplace drowned out the shrill cry and whimpering of the child now laying dead in the shadowy corner. Iskkari decided to stay in it’s lithe form for at least a while longer.  Who would notice a small black kitten in a city of millions?  

 

A tall man with a perfectly trimmed mustache, and equally eloquent goatee stood basking in the remaining sunlight at the tower balcony. He quietly sipped a rather ancient calimshite wine in a crystalline flask. A silver ring with a green jewel reflected off the sunlight on his left hand, a similar silver ring but with a black gem adorned his right hand. The black silken robes he wore flowed almost unnaturally on it’s own; his grey cloak barely covering a bandolier of nine magical wands on his belt. Khelben Blackstaff Arunsun never left anything to chance, and he felt the presence of the otherworldly being enter into the city almost immediately as it arrived. He pulled a ivory figurine of a slim cat off one of his many bookshelves filled with spellbooks, lore, and other magical things.  He whispered “Kathazul”, and the ivory figurine took a smoky form and then a grey lynx half the height of a man stood in front of Khelben.  “Bring the doppelganger to me alive, I need to inquire it about a few things.”  Kathazul gave Khelben a soft growl, and leapt out of the tower. It would hunt again, and it was happy.

 

 

 

[Peregrinus]

well, we have a third writer in our little group. and two are talented, 3 if you include me, I'd never judge the quality of my own work... the surprises never end it seems.

as for da:i, has anyone noticed that there are enemies who's attacks rotate your character about 180o, so that when said attack hits it always hits you from behind? after patch 3, there seem to be more hostiles that do this, at least for me. and my focus bar now seems to be broken, I have master focus, though only one bar seems to fill. *sigh* what is bioware doing to this game?

I would love to see a piece from you on here.  Will you indulge us?  

 

[Fundamentalist Nail]

I applaud you all for your drive and creativity and really hope that something comes about!
You're all grand folk and I am sure good things will happen.

I'd put my name down for writing -- I have a degree in it, not that that means much! However I've got to write a bloody 10,000 word piece for my further studies and may not have time.

Maybe I will, I don't know yet.

Cyran and Peregrinus have already shared some stellar examples of their writing.

 

So well done!

Since I like sharing my work (and am a megalomaniac), I'll post part of one of the stories I got published in a uni magazine. It's part of a larger piece, but I basically edited around the more prose-y, ethereal and ambiguous stuff, and compiled those bits in a single piece.

 

____

 

 

 

Salted Love 

 

There’s more to the sea than salt and water, though it may taste that way at first. When I’m here, I can taste the earth and I can taste time. Most keep their eyes closed, afraid of the salt, not letting the sea in. When you invite the sea, it treats you well. Better than any man or woman. I open my eyes and let the salt water ravage and blur my sight, but my vision is not impaired—this is just another way to see.

 

I descend to speak with Poseidon. The great sea god sits on the rocks beneath a lighthouse—a cold, hard, wet throne. We blow bubble rings that drift up to the cruel surface. I ask him how to be happy, and he gives me a shell. I hold it to my ear and inside it is the ocean. To be happy is to be here.

 

Have you ever been loved? Calypso loves me like no other has. When I breathe in her wet, suffocating presence, my skin prickles. She runs her cold hands over my chest and bites at my ears. We sink into the dark. Our clothing floats around us, suspended like jellyfish. I suck her neck and swallow a lungful of her. I erupt—a geyser in the depths. This is happiness, I whisper to Calypso.

           

Mer-people kiss at my body. They stroke away the tension and pull me lower, far away from the unkind place above. The unhappy place. Poseidon holds his hand out to greet me. Calypso sheds the seaweed draped over her shoulders. The sea takes me in its arms, and I am happy. This is where happiness is. Poseidon tightens his grip, Calypso ties her seaweed around my neck. They pull me under and drown me with their salted love. 

 

___

 

I swear, not all of my writing is twisted, suicidal, nautical 'erotica'

[Invisible Man]

I would love to see a piece from you on here.  Will you indulge us?  
 

my last work was on a laptop I gave my mom, and it went total meldown about a year ago. the rest were spread across the 5 or so other desktops I've had over the last 20 years or so, non of them are in working order currently, they're mostly scrap. haven't been writing other than a bit of copy for my mom's shop, though that was more a collaboration, so, I'm sorry to disappoint. I guess I could come up with something though, but it takes time, for me at least. I need a solid idea that inspires me, I can't simply just sit and start typing gold, would be nice if it worked that way, but alas it's not such a world or I'm not gifted with such a vivid imagination.