Maybe. I will have a closer look at the options.
So to be clear, you are saying there is VOIP for the PC version of DAI? No text chat, however, correct?
DA:I is definitely voice-chat compatible.
If the addition of "push to talk" isn't responsible, another possibility is that you and your friend are experiencing an oddity related to NAT settings. This used to happen to me occasionally when playing on PSN, or rarely, on XBL. It will allow the players to connect, but they will not be able to hear each other. Even the microphone symbol will be shaded, suggesting the other person doesn't have a microphone connected, even if they do.
If that does turn out to be the issue, the solution on PC would be to change the router's NAT settings. If you don't have any experience doing that, you may want to consult with someone for advice before proceeding. There are also ports that can be opened that could help, but I'd get some advice about that before doing anything, too.
Also while I am here asking stupid questions.
Do we ever get to customize our appearance in MP? Cause my poor chick is super oogly =(
No, unfortunately. Other than a handful of armour sets and a few armour colour options, there aren't any customization options for MP characters. According to BioWare, there won't be in the future, either.