Yeah its a selfish ultimatum. Forsake what you believe in, your heritage to be with me or go, basically what it boils down to. I chose to stick with her. Aria is a devote Andrastian also.Skyhold is full of Andrastian stuff.

It has caused much controversy and hatred for the character

especially those who are pro Dalish..
I like to think that it makes her quirky.. Unique. And I also believe there are deeper reasons why she is so anti elf and magic in general. Maybe reasons she doesn't even know.
I mean, she is mysterious and never talks about her past in depth. Unlike other characters who speak about themselves quite freely.
Makes me wonder if the devs have some bomb dropping revelation planned for her character in the future.. Her role in the game is strange enough and she is the only character you can boot from the organisation any time regardless of approval rating.