You want the player to define combat, through skill, ingenuity, and inventiveness.
In a game like fallout 3 if you encounter a death claw, you determine the outcome of the battle not simply level and gear, can you out maneuver it,maybe place mines around, can you poison it, can you shoot its legs to weaken mobility.
If that scenario happened in the "true RPG" sense that people have been indoctrinated into, you simply would die for being under leveled
Skill, ingenuity, inventiveness, cunning come from the player, ME trilogy more so 2 and 3, esp obvious in multiplayer. Fallout 3/Vegas, Witcher 2 and soon to be 3, dark souls etc.
In these games gear and leveling is important, but they function more like perks to enhance the players vision of how they want to play instead of dominating it
In order to make combat have these qualities of being more player defined ti must have tremendous depth, not just for the combat, but for everything interrelated to it.
In reality, supposed "true RPG gamers" are the "press button and watch something awesome happen" players, mmo agro enemy press a couple of keys to trigger animations, and win because of gear and level combat. Rinse and repeat.
The other extreme is also true esp for 1st person shooters, enemy increase health not tactics, so its just a matter of getting a bigger gun. At least 3rd person shooters help to solve this by making the game more about cover and precision.
Games like Farcry 3, Force Unleashed, Batman arkym series to name a few added RPG aspects, but they are linear, they don't evolve down different pathways. Sadly DA I and DA2 feels more closer to these type of games than to a Skyrim