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[songsmith2003]

This topic is a twist of the "worst death" question. Which NPC or companion/advisor would your Inquisitor/Warden/Hawke (heck, admit it: you the player) happily murder knife (or at least beat senseless) if they could? Why?

 

It's been awhile since I've played DAO and DA2 so I probably don't have many to offer from those. Here they are in no particular order. (Sorry in advance for all the name misspellings.)

 

1. Isolde. I swear, the moment she asks, "Who is this woman, Tegaaaaaaaaaaahn," I wanted to off her. To borrow from Blackwall, "Only the Warden who's about to save the effing world, your arldom, your idiotic husband and your whiny kid as well as fix the mess you made of everything, you rude waste of skin." Seriously. I wish she could have been tried for her crime. I understand she didn't want to lose her kid to the Circle, but she's the person I blame for all the death at Redcliff.

 

2. Gorim. He was the love of your dwarf noble's life, yet he seemed to conveniently get over her at super speed. Didn't take him long at all. Plus he will not shut up about his "fine dwarven crafts." My Warden had a look at them, and she will attest they weren't that "fine."

 

3. Sandal's dad for the most annoying voice ever, promising good prices and then selling everything at an inflated price.

 

4. What's her face who you steal a ring from in the Denerim marketplace. Horrible woman.

 

5. The guy whose misbehavior causes the entire City Elf origin. So much trouble could have been avoided if you could have murder knifed him--repeatedly--at the beginning.

 

6. Jowan. See above. (Also, did the VA also voice Mouse the Pride Demon?)

 

7. Most of Kirkwall by the end of DA2. I swear, you try to help the mages and then they do turn out to be abominations and maelificars. Thanks for that betrayal. You try to be diplomatic to the stupid Arishok, and he comes up with some trumped up reason to start a war. (Really? Just because the suspected thief landed in the city does not excuse attacking the city. Just send out your spies/assassins and kidnap her. Idiot.) Then you have the templars who either blindly follow or are just bat guano crazy.

 

8. Anders. One, for being completely changed from the wonderful Awakenings character and, two, for causing me so much endless trouble. I saw things from your POV and you still thought blowing up a good woman and hundreds of innocent people was a good idea? (Okay, you can punish him. He's a "beat until he sees sense" type.)

 

9. Sebastian for being annoying and judgmental and wearing ridiculous armor. Also, who presents a possible LI that late into the game? Bad idea all around.

 

10. Isabelle. See the entry about the Arishok. How many people got murderized because of her greed?

 

11. Uncle Idiot for causing so much trouble.

 

12. Definitely Meredith.

 

13. Also Orsino after he turned to blood magic at the end. WTF, guy? I've defended you this entire time and now you do this?

 

14. Seggert for sticking it to the refugees. Probably related to that merchant you meet in Lothering.

 

15. The racist guy standing near the Skyhold merchants who continues to insult elves even if the Herald/Inquisitor is an elf.

 

16. The freaking minstrel. Haaaate.

 

17. The Lord Seeker and the chantry mother/sister at Val Royeaux. Rude.

 

18. The sneering guard captain in Val Royeaux who warns his men about the "herald" when you first arrive there.

 

19. Solas after he breaks my elf inquisitor's heart. Jerk.

 

20. Vivienne and Sera for different reasons.

 

21. Leliana if she goes stabbity stab and nutso.

 

22. Most of Orlais just because.

 

23. um...basically everyone. I mean, have you ever done a murder knife play-through? It's cathartic! (Especially if you play fairly compassionate yet snarky like I usually do.)

 

 

[Paragonslustre]

You forgot Bianca 

[songsmith2003]

You forgot Bianca 

 

Definitely! She really deserved it for how she set everything in motion and then pulled an attitude to your Inquisitor. I knew I'd forget a lot of them! If my Fem!Hawke couldn't have Varric then I vote to fix him up with Scout Harding.

[ThelLastTruePatriot]

 Cole - Don't like how he essentially messes with people's minds, no matter his intent, a spirit like that is too disturbing to leave alive.

 

Vivienne- Says "My dear" too damn much.

 

Leliana- since she is supposed to be dead in my canon anyway.

 

Solas - Because I bet if you asked him what's the best way to end his life, he will "slightly approve"

[MrMrPendragon]

Vivienne, Sera, Cole, and Blackwall.

 

And that dwarf at Skyhold (near the door) that doesn't really do anything.

 

Oh and that quiz-giving guy near Skyhold's walls, just because.

[MoonDrummer]

Sera

[KaiserShep]

A fine subject, if I do say so myself.

 

Anyway, unless I'm doing a stupid-evil playthrough, I typically reserve the murder knife for characters that are genuinely asking for it, like Kendells (for city elves), Danzig, that doofus that has Feynriel captive, etc.. The only companion I've ever killed is Anders, and unless BioWare pulls another plot point like they did with that guy, he will probably be the last.

[Draining Dragon]

Sera.

Anders (again).

[Apo]

And that dwarf at Skyhold (near the door) that doesn't really do anything.

 

The one in the main hall ? I think that his job is about the mosaics.

[KaiserShep]

Lol why would anyone want to kill the mosaics dwarf? This is why we can't be trusted with universal murder knife access XD

[AxholeRose]

Blackwall.  The first companion to leave me, after a heated conversation asking me if I was happy "with the blood on my hands".  WTF!  There are two things I can think of that resulted in Greatly Disapprove from him.  One was my Skyhold announcement claiming I am in this for my own personal power gain.  Second was for conscripting the mages (or templars, I forget).  I chose the option to let him stay but he walked away.  I sooo wished I could knife him in the back, or have Leliana do it.

 

 

p.s.- glad there is no dislike button on the forums.  ha!

[tigertots]

Wynne, Anders, Carver, Arl of Redcliffe (Eamon?), Isolde, Jowan, Anora, Goldanna, Merrill, Sister Peatrice, Cole.

 

There are lots more, didn't realise how many characters I didn't like until I had to type them up.

[lynroy]

Anders. Wait I already did that.

[Kierro Ren]

All my characters hates Vivienne. To many, "Oh darling." Deary... BLAH I hate richy rich people.

[Kaibe]

Requisition scout.

[the Dame]

That privilege for Anders only.

[Phoe77]

Honestly, no one really sticks out to me in Inquisition.  Lucius pisses me off when you meet him in Val Royeaux and I never don't want to beat Livius to a pulp, but most of the time there are judgment options that I find much more pleasing.  

[Ash Wind]

Isolde, if only for the atrocious accent

 

I forget his name, but the douche who you have to negotiate with to get to the Mage Tower in DAO

 

DA2 Anders

 

Sebastian - enough said

 

Gamlen - a seriously uninteresting ****** who needs offing

 

Meredith for being a whack-job

 

Solas - Angry that he was rejected by the Vulcan Science Academy - He is the one who empowered Cory and yet he distainfully sits in judgement of every decision IQ makes

 

Talis - die. die. die.

 

Solas again - I want to resurrect him just so I can Kill him again and again and again

 

Orsino - for preaching like he does, and then when the **** hits the fan resorting to Blood Magic like a douche - Die. Die. Die

 

Solas - Have I mentioned this?

[Poledo]

Requisition scout.

 

Requisition Officer. How is this not everyone's first choice. I was just thinking the other day that if it was possible to kill npc's I would off her. Then I was wondering if anyone was working on a mod to remove her, and if so where do I sign up to contribute?!

[EmBlue]

Sebastian. Because if you say you're going to spare Anders, Sebastian will threaten to start a war. Since I would rather that didn't happen, I knifed Anders. But I would have preferred to have killed Sebastian (probably... I'd have liked the option). Because, seriously, invade Kirkwall? I mean, I know he's brokenhearted and vengeful but Anders is to blame. Kirkwall and Anders?-- They're not the same thing.

   Would have been interesting to see how the companions would have reacted to that, if I'd made that choice too.

 

I also kinda like the irony, op... in your big list of people you'd stab you've got down Leliana...if she goes ''stabbity stab and nutso''. Sorry :-p

[songsmith2003]

Blackwall.  The first companion to leave me, after a heated conversation asking me if I was happy "with the blood on my hands".  WTF!  There are two things I can think of that resulted in Greatly Disapprove from him.  One was my Skyhold announcement claiming I am in this for my own personal power gain.  Second was for conscripting the mages (or templars, I forget).  I chose the option to let him stay but he walked away.  I sooo wished I could knife him in the back, or have Leliana do it.

 

 

p.s.- glad there is no dislike button on the forums.  ha!

 

It's especially hypocritical considering his background.

 

Sebastian. Because if you say you're going to spare Anders, Sebastian will threaten to start a war. Since I would rather that didn't happen, I knifed Anders. But I would have preferred to have killed Sebastian (probably... I'd have liked the option). Because, seriously, invade Kirkwall? I mean, I know he's brokenhearted and vengeful but Anders is to blame. Kirkwall and Anders?-- They're not the same thing.

   Would have been interesting to see how the companions would have reacted to that, if I'd made that choice too.

 

I also kinda like the irony, op... in your big list of people you'd stab you've got down Leliana...if she goes ''stabbity stab and nutso''. Sorry :-p

 

Now, now.  I never claimed to be any less crazy than The Nightingale! (That is pretty funny). I knew there were more reasons to knife Sebastian. I just couldn't remember them all. (Makes me kind of want Sebastian and Blackwall to have a convo together.)

 

I figure if you're going to murder knife people, it should be a bunch of people (and some for ridiculous reasons).

 

Requisition Officer. How is this not everyone's first choice. I was just thinking the other day that if it was possible to kill npc's I would off her. Then I was wondering if anyone was working on a mod to remove her, and if so where do I sign up to contribute?!

 

See? I knew if I posted this, people would remind me of others who need to go. I'd settle for a mod that would prevent her from saying anything or borking party banter. Just let me check the req table if I'm interested.

 

Isolde, if only for the atrocious accent

 

I forget his name, but the douche who you have to negotiate with to get to the Mage Tower in DAO

 

DA2 Anders

 

Sebastian - enough said

 

Gamlen - a seriously uninteresting ****** who needs offing

 

Meredith for being a whack-job

 

Solas - Angry that he was rejected by the Vulcan Science Academy - He is the one who empowered Cory and yet he distainfully sits in judgement of every decision IQ makes

 

Talis - die. die. die.

 

Solas again - I want to resurrect him just so I can Kill him again and again and again

 

Orsino - for preaching like he does, and then when the **** hits the fan resorting to Blood Magic like a douche - Die. Die. Die

 

Solas - Have I mentioned this?

 

I can get behind that knife.

 

 

Wynne, Anders, Carver, Arl of Redcliffe (Eamon?), Isolde, Jowan, Anora, Goldanna, Merrill, Sister Peatrice, Cole.

 

There are lots more, didn't realise how many characters I didn't like until I had to type them up.

 

I know! People keep mentioning characters I forgot about. I like Wynne until she becomes preachy. I liked Mother Ghiselle the first or second time. After that she turned into Wynne 2.0. She really won my ire when she voiced her veiled Tevinter prejudiced concerns about Dorian.

[Scofield]

Only 2 Da chars i really dislike an thats Zevran an Fenris, so prob them

[Gaesesagai]

As someone who finds it impossible to play "dark" in games (I have probably 1500 hours in SWTOR and all my 13 characters are 100% light side ), I must say I feel no "need" for this horrible tool, people cheerfully call "murder knife".

Still, considering my proffesional background, I find so many people wanting it and talking about it with such ease to be just... fascinating 

[ReiKokoFuuu]

i think petrice is the only one i would personally bring out the murder knife for.  i always regret not being able to kill her.  i absolutely hated her guts.

 

other than that, there isn't really anyone i would do that to, not even velanna who is, by far, the companion i hate the most in the whole series.  i would like to have smacked her a couple times, but i wouldn't want to kill her just because i didn't like her personality.

 

i didn't like gamlen either, but he wasn't ALL bad.  he clearly cared a great deal for leandra and charade (if you reunite them). i just wouldn't trust him with any money.

 

when sebastian wasn't going on and on about the maker, trying to convince fenris to turn merrill and anders over to the templars behind hawke's back, trying to justify that fenris' suffering during slavery was all part of the maker's plan etc etc, he was ok in my book.  his heart's in the right place, but sometimes it feels like his religious beliefs borders on fanaticism and that's NOT ok.  i hate that.  trying to invade a city, your previous home of several years, for one man is also hypocritical and downright stupid.  again though, i wouldn't kill him.  just beat some sense into him >__>

 

other than petrice though, i REALLY don't feel that anyone else in any of the games deserves it.  at least, no one that comes to mind.  there were plenty of npcs i didn't like, but they don't deserve murder knife >___<