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[Dobby]

Haha I love this!

[mybudgee]

These guys could use a Bulwark

[Eternal Phoenix]

We need to play: "Lobbyists Rescue Knights from his ban and then hold him at gun point until he finishes all of his LP's including this one!"

[Dio Demon]

We need to play: "Lobbyists Rescue Knights from his ban and then hold him at gun point until he finishes all of his LP's including this one!"

EP you should be the leader... and get everyone killed. Except me, because I can't die. God mode is in my very being.

[Decepticon Leader Sully]

BSN slays the evil hydra of the literary who's

[Johnnie Walker]

Chapter 5:

Bunz debriefs the other Lobbyists one by one before rounding up volunteers for the next week. With many of the Lobbyists getting their illnesses treated like Dobby, or drinking away the days with copious amounts of vodka like Recon, Bunz wonders if he would have to go dungeon running again.
 

"I have no doubts that Liftus Christ will guide me down a safe and righteous path. But I wouldn't mind a break like some of the others. Maybe I could hang out at the Sanitarium with Dobby..."
 
Eternal Phoenix on the other hand, didn't seem to share Bunz' sense of dread.
 

 
Jock Cranley and mousestalker step forward, with Cranley dragging Eternal Phoenix with him.
 

"I think we're good to go."
 

"Whoa whoa whoa, who said I wanted to go? There's a barmaid at the Tavern and I want to show her my chubby green monster... if you know what I mean..."
 

"Yuck."
 

"It's too late bro, you already 'volunteered'. Alright, let's head out!"
 

 
Rather than the Ruins and the Weald, they decide to explore the Warrens this time around. In other words...
 

 
The sewers.
  
As expected, the first room brings the first battle.
 

 
Eternal Phoenix makes the first move and takes out his lute to fill the Lobbyists with battle courage.


THEY
 
HAVE NO STYLE,
THEY HAVE NO GRACE.
THESE PIGS HAVE AN UGLY FACE.
BUT WE'RE HERE TILL THE END, SO BEAR THE PAIN,
DO IT FOR YOUR BUDDY ACID_RAIN.
 


Despite no one else ever seeing an "Acid_Rain" on BSN, the catchy tune did seem to lift spirits and they dispatch of the larger creatures without issue.

However, mere moments before wrapping up the battle, misfortune strikes Jock Cranley. He is attacked by the last remaining enemy and contracts Tetanus. Severely affecting his combat ability, as well as his stress levels.



The last beast goes down to Bunz' mighty sword and the group moves on. Cranley however, has let his condition get to him as he shows significant signs of stress, which unsettle the other Lobbyists.



When they are ambushed by even more disgusting monsters, he starts to reach a breaking point.



TheBunz, sensing Jock Cranley's fragile grip on sanity, charges the Pig Men and attacks fiercely, hoping to end the battle quickly. His powerful core strength gives him explosive burst speed and it catches the beasts off-guard.



They don't all go down however, and as one of the survivors stops Bunz in his tracks with a vicious acidic Vomit attack, Cranley's resolve is tested.



Cranley howls in despair. He's lost it.



Annoyed, Bunz intensifies his attacks and downs the last opponent.



The tension in the air loosens a little and the Lobbyists turn to Cranley to try and calm him down. But before they all settle down and talk to him in the nearest room, they're ambushed by another hunting party.



Fleet footed, Eternal Phoenix jumps into action, striking one of the enemies with his hand scythe for a fatal hit.



However the other Lobbyists were not as quick on their feet. A large Swine Chopper makes for Bunz. And the Crusader is caught unprepared for the overwhelming attack.



Bunz falls to the ground, he's not moving. And he will never move again.



The death of her comrade pushes the already-stressed mousestalker to the edge.



She is overpowered by fear, then, for one swift moment, rage. She lashes out at the Swine Chopper, swinging wildly with her Spiked Club.



But the moment is over. Bunz is dead. And the Lobbyists are distraught.


"Nooo... I don't want to die... poor Bunz..."


"We are so boned. We're screwed. We're done for. Just kill me now."

The Jester did his best to keep the team's spirits up. And it was up to him to lead them.


"Y-you guys want to leave? Fine. Leave if you want. Dishonour Bunz' memory if that is your wish. The man is going to be lifting with his patron Saint Zyzz and making >tfw no gf threads in Heaven. But it's up to us to carry on with his legacy. It's up to us to finish this. So follow me, and let's end it."

The final room. Filled with enemies. Injured, demoralised and missing their leader, the Lobbyists all feel the stress and are fighting not to be overwhelmed by it.



Cranley moves first, eliminating some of the bigger hostiles with precision.



Eternal Phoenix and mousestalker are slow to react however, weighed down by their mental state. The Swine focus their attacks on mousestalker in the rear, and she suffers a deluge of acidic Vomit.



Though she tried her best to resist it, she succumbs to it's toxicity.




"W-what? Not you too, mousestalker!"

The Swine Chopper takes advantage of Cranley's distraction, slicing the Highwayman with a beastly ferocity.



With Jock Cranley at Death's Door, Eternal Phoenix loses his resolve too.



In desperation, he lunges at the Swine Chopper, stabbing the Pig with his knife and winning the battle.



Eternal Phoenix looks at mousestalker's lifeless body, and at Jock Cranley on the ground, still breathing.

He walks over to mousestalker, and takes what items he can from her.


"Nothing p-personal, mousestalker. Y-you just gotta look out for yourself in this life."

The Jester then looks over at Cranley.


"Ahh crap. You're the only one who knows how to get out of here, aren't you? Well, consider yourself lucky, Jock Cranley. It's not ogre for you today."

Eternal Phoenix and Jock Cranley make their way for the exit, victorious. But it was a hollow victory at best, for TheBunz and mousestalker will never leave the Warrens. Ever.



They arrive back in town and deliver the bad news. Unsurprisingly, the other Lobbyists didn't take it all too well. But Cassandra Saturn in particular took it rough.


"NOOOOOO, BUNZ!!       "
 
Cranley leaves for the Abbey. Another round of absolution was needed. Eternal Phoenix on the other hand walks towards to the Tavern, another round of beer was what he needed.
 
And as the other Lobbyists mark out two tombstones in the Graveyard to honour TheBunz and mousestalker, the newest volunteer catches them by surprise.
 

"Hey guys, what's up? Why the long faces, you look like someone died or something. Ahahaha..."
 

Spoiler

5 bucks on Bunz dying first.

 

You're on, Mousestalker is going down first.

 

Wow! Hahah, it's funny because it's not like I can savescum or anything with this game. It runs all on autosaving which means you have to live with the results you get, no manipulating it, reloading it or anything. Good calls. RIP guise. ;_;7

[Johnnie Walker]

In case anyone accidently reads my response before reading chapter 5:

Spoiler

People aren't going to like that Bunz is gone. Ned Stark as fcuk.

But Sim is now with us!

[mousestalker]

Yikes!

This is most entertaining...

[Dio Demon]

F*** YES! I CALLED IT! YES! KING TONY YOU OWE ME 5 BUCKS!

[Dio Demon]

In case anyone accidently reads my response before reading chapter 5:

Spoiler

People aren't going to like that Bunz is gone. Ned Stark as fcuk.

But Sim is now with us!

Sim is now the main character. He will get everyone killed and loot them.

[Jock Cranley]

I got a laugh out of this one. 

[Dermain]

Welp, poor Bunz and mouse. 

 

At least mouse died afraid... 

[Johnnie Walker]

#BlameSimFam

[Eternal Phoenix]

Jock Cranley and mousestalker step forward, with Cranley dragging Eternal Phoenix with him.
 

"I think we're good to go."
 

"Whoa whoa whoa, who said I wanted to go? There's a barmaid at the Tavern and I want to show her my chubby green monster... if you know what I mean..."

 
That killed me XD
 
And I can't believe Bunz is dead. He was set up as the main character!

 

Then mousestalker dropped straight after!

 

This can only mean one thing:
 
Knights confirmed as George RR Martin in disguise.

[mousestalker]

At least I died well.

Should I bake cookies for the funerals? That seems kind of weird...

[Eternal Phoenix]

At least I died well.

Should I bake cookies for the funerals? That seems kind of weird...

 

No, you're dead and you need to stop posting on the entire forum.

 

In fact that should be the new rule when someone dies in this LP. We delete our accounts forever and never ever return. Deal?

[mousestalker]

No, you're dead and you need to stop posting on the entire forum.

 

In fact that should be the new rule when someone dies in this LP. We delete our accounts forever and never ever return. Deal?

You need to check your privilege there Mr. "I can breathe and you can't"

 

The post ambulatory have been oppressed long enough. We have rights. We'd have voices if we could speak.

 

The oppression of the life privileged over the rest of us has endured entirely too long!

[Eternal Phoenix]

You need to check your privilege there Mr. "I can breathe and you can't"
 
The post ambulatory have been oppressed long enough. We have rights. We'd have voices if we could speak.
 
The oppression of the life privileged over the rest of us has endured entirely too long!

Silence dead scum! Delete your account or I'll do it for you!

Stop defying the laws of nature and just...um...die-die?

[Leo]

Oh wow! RIP in Peace TheBunz and mousestalker, RIP in Peace.

[Johnnie Walker]

Chapter 6:

 
The Lobbyists scowl at SimfamSP. Way to totally ruin the mood, Sim.
 

"You need to level up your social etiquette. Your joke just now was in poor taste! So tell us, what can you offer the team, anime avatar user?"
 

 
To the surprise of none, SimfamSP was a pariah in the Lobby. Such is the fate of a Leper. Infested with Rabies, he wanders from thread to thread, hoping to find solace and friendship, though all he ever does is make things worse and draw the ire of other Lobbyists, who blame him for everything. He's a Warrens Scrounger, adept at scouting out sewer levels and a Quickdraw to boot, he likes to strike first in combat. A surprisingly accomplished lifter, SimfamSP is best utilised at the front of party formations, where he can take the brunt of abuse and deal out heavy melee damage. It's the least he can do seeing as everything is his fault.
 

"Friends! Let me join the next expedition. I'll work hard to earn your trust. I'll be so much stronger than those weaklings who kicked the bucket! You can count on me."
 
That did not go over well. Cassandra Saturn slaps SimfamSP and runs off, wailing about Bunz' image being re-created in Saint's Row IV.
 
Recon on the other hand, speaks up.
 

"We have to fight. We don't all have the luxury of being SJWs, bitching on their $2000 MacBooks about privilege because some guy spreads his legs on a train for comfort. God I wish I could round up all the SJWs and dump them in Australa for the spiders to eat. I'll join you, SimfamSP."
 
Gravisanimi immediately follows Recon's lead.
 

"Yes, this may prove to be an interesting journey. I will accompany you two."
 

"W-why would you want to do that?"
 

"You know why."
 

"T-there's no r-reason for it! I am free of filthy desires!!"
 
Gravisanimi merely smirks at Recon, causing the Crusader to recoil awkwardly.
 
DobbySaurus also volunteers for the next run, and with her joining, the slots are filled. The other Lobbyists disperse and go back to their own business while SimfamSP and the others head towards their next objective. Not eager to repeat the disaster in the Warrens, they decide on exploring more of the Weald.
 

 
The more successful runs in each area you do (different mission types too), the more of a chance you have of exploring enough of it to discover a boss. Defeating all the bosses is kind of the goal of the game, the way of destroying the curse that plagues the estate.
 
They step into the Weald, SimfamSP taking the lead.
 

 
They face many obstacles, this one an overgrowth of hideous roots. Luckily, the team brought a pair of shovels along and Dobby handles the problem without any trouble, digging and cutting away at the roots until an opening forms.
 

 
They enter the first room and with it, comes the first battle.
 

 
Gravisanimi recites a phrase in some weird language before their enemies have a chance to strike.
 

 
He then launches his attack, severely weakening the enemy Cultist.
 

 
Swinging his mighty Sword with purpose, Recon Smites another Cultist.
 

 
And the newcomer, SimfamSP, finishes off the last enemy with an impressive attack of his own.
 

 
The Lobbyists travel through many dark areas.
 

 
With plenty of enemies to boot. However the team does well in dispatching them. None of them lose focus and all of them hold a quiet grit about them. Nobody wanted to end up like Bunz or mousestalker.
 

 

 
The hordes of enemies slow down, and the team's final goal is within sight. Taking the opportunity, Recon asks SimfamSP a few questions. The Inquisitor wanting to sound out whether Sim may have ulterior motives.
 

 

"So what's your motive for leading us today?"
 
Subtle as ever, Recon never changes. Though the others become interested in the conversation as well. SimfamSP walks in silence for a few minutes, before answering the Inquisitor.
 

 

"I used to be part of the Community. Now I'm just a Leper. But even though I am blamed and hated everywhere, I want to give back to the place that has given me so much."
 

"A lot of loyalty for a BSNer."
 

"What about the mask? If I pull that off, would you die?"
 

"It would be extremely painful."
 

"You're a big guy."
 

"For you."
 
SimfamSP leads them down a dark path out of the open forest and into a damp cavern. According to their maps, this would be the last area on their checklist. And sure enough, out pops several monsters.
 

 
The Fungi attack first, spraying a toxic gas all over DobbySaurus and Gravisanimi.
 

 
Grav does his best to heal the damage done to Dobby. Using his knowledge of dark arts, he performs a Wyrd Reconstruction of her body and restores her to vigour.
 

 
The Grave Robber moves to retaliate, throwing her dagger and piercing the heart of her enemy.
 

 
Wading his way back into the thick of the melee, SimfamSP swings his greatsword, inflicting a large amount of damage to several enemies.
 

 
Meanwhile, Recon shifts into position and unleashes a powerful maneuver, lunging at the enemy. The attack completely obliterates the remaining Fungi Monsters.
 

"In the name of Her Royal Highness, take this! Luna Thrust attack!"
 

 
With the battle won, Gravisanimi raises an eyebrow at Recon.
 

"What? What are you looking at me like that for? Y-you sick fak! I hate all ponies. I just hate Luna the least. E-enough of this implying! Let's go back to town."
 
SimfamSP holds back a snicker, he didn't want to be blamed for Recon's grumpy mood when they got back. Regardless, the Lobbyists were victorious. And best of all, they didn't lose anyone this week.
 

 

[Johnnie Walker]

Meanwhile, Recon shifts into position and unleashes a powerful maneuver, lunging at the enemy. The attack completely obliterates the remaining Fungi Monsters.
 

"In the name of Her Royal Highness, take this! Luna Thrust attack!"

 

*snip*

With the battle won, Gravisanimi raises an eyebrow at Recon.
 

"What? What are you looking at me like that for? Y-you sick fak! I hate all ponies. I just hate Luna the least. E-enough of this implying! Let's go back to town."

 

Luna thrust attack?!

What in the fcuk, hon? I'm the one that gets stoned, not you.

 

Fcuk, I am dying. Luna thrust attack... holy shiit.

 

 

Brb, gonna change my Steam name to Luna Thrust Attack.

[Dio Demon]

Why doesn't Recon just admit his love... we'd accept him... kinda... not really... he'd feel a lot better about himself... kinda... not really.